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TOEFL TPO -1 Academic Discussion Writing Sample: Instructions Your professor is teaching a class on public policy. Write a post responding to the professor's question.

AIによる評価とフィードバック付きの実際のユーザー投稿

1件のユーザー投稿サンプルがあります

無料練習を始める

タスク概要

Doctor Gupta

This week, we will be discussing a shortage of affordable housing that exists in many countries. In these places, housing-both apartments (flats) and houses--are expensive, because populations are growing faster than new housing is being built. Now, think about places in your country that have a housing shortage. In your post, I would like you to indicate the most effective way for the government to address a housing shortage in your country. Please explain why you think so.

Claire

In my country, there is a lack of affordable housing in the big cities. Low-cost housing exists in areas outside of the cities, but that means workers have long commutes to reach their jobs in the cities. I recommend that my government create initiatives to encourage the construction of large buildings with many affordable apartments in cities.

Paul

Claire's recommendation is fine, but many people prefer to live in a house rather than an apartment, even if they have longer commutes. Living in a house can be quieter and more private. So, I believe my government should give subsidies or tax relief to construction companies to build small, affordable single-family houses on unused land that surrounds many cities.

ユーザーサンプルと評価結果

ユーザーサンプル

The most effective way for the government to address a housing shortage in my country would be through increasing investment in public housing projects. With populations growing but private development unable to keep up, only a major commitment from the government can ensure affordable housing for all citizens. By directly funding the construction of new affordable apartments and homes, the public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand. Increased spending on public housing allows more families access to safe, stable shelters at costs below current market rates. It is the most direct method for the government to take action on this issue and fulfill its responsibility of protecting this basic need for everyone in the community.

評価結果

1. 子项得分

Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 5 Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.5 Language Use and Grammar: 4.5

2. 预估分数

28. 3 任务完成度

这篇文章在完成任务方面做得很好,有效地回答了问题,并提出了一个明确的观点。为了进一步改进,可以考虑在文章中提供更多具体的例子和细节来支持观点。此外,尝试使用更丰富的词汇和语法结构来增强表达能力。

Example 1: Instead of "By directly funding the construction of new affordable apartments and homes, the public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand.", you could write "By directly funding the construction of new affordable apartments and homes in strategic locations, such as near public transportation hubs, the public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand more effectively."

Example 2: Instead of "Increased spending on public housing allows more families access to safe, stable shelters at costs below current market rates.", you could write "Increased spending on public housing not only allows more families access to safe, stable shelters at costs below current market rates but also promotes social integration and reduces income inequality."

4. 文章结构与组织

文章的结构和组织方面做得很好,有清晰的引言、主体和结论。为了进一步改进,可以考虑在段落之间添加更明确的过渡句子,以便读者更容易理解观点之间的联系。此外,确保每个段落都有一个明确的主题句,以便读者更好地了解每个段落的重点。

Example 1: Instead of starting the second sentence with "With populations growing...", you could write "Considering the rapid population growth and the inability of private development to keep up, only a major commitment from the government can ensure affordable housing for all citizens."

Example 2: Add a transition sentence between the second and third sentences, such as "This approach not only addresses the immediate housing shortage but also contributes to long-term social stability." Then continue with "By directly funding the construction of new affordable apartments and homes, the public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand."

5. 语法批改

The most effective way for the government to address a housing shortage in my country would be through increasing investment in public housing projects. With populations growing but private development unable to keep up, only a major commitment from the government can ensure affordable housing for all citizens. By directly funding the construction of new affordable apartments and homes, the public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand. Increased spending on public housing allows more families access to safe, stable shelters at costs below current market rates. It is the most direct method for the government to take action on this issue and fulfill its responsibility of protecting this basic need for everyone in the community.

Section Title: 6 文章修订

The most effective way for the government to address a housing shortage in my country would be through increasing investment in public housing projects. With populations growing but private development unable to keep up, only a major commitment from the government can ensure affordable housing for all citizens. By directly funding the construction of new affordable apartments and homes, the public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand. Increased spending on public housing allows more families access to safe, stable shelters at costs below current market rates. It is the most direct method for the government to take action on this issue and fulfill its responsibility of protecting this basic need for everyone in the community. (124 words)

Revised essay: Section Title: 7 文章批改

The most effective way for the government to address a housing shortage in my country would be through increasing investment in public housing projects. projects (reason: clarifies the focus of the essay). With populations growing but private development unable to keep up, up (explanation: highlights the problem), only a major commitment from the government can ensure affordable housing for all citizens. citizens (reason: emphasizes the role of government). By directly funding the construction of new affordable apartments and homes, homes (explanation: explains how it can be done), the public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand. demand (reason: shows potential outcome). Increased spending on public housing allows more families access to safe, stable shelters at costs below current market rates. rates (explanation: describes benefits). It is the most direct method for the government to take action on this issue and fulfill its responsibility of protecting this basic need for everyone in the community.community (reason: concludes with a strong statement about government's role).

8 思维导图


- 1. Introduction
  - Housing shortage issue
  - Government responsibility

- 2. Public housing projects
  - Direct funding for construction
  - Affordable apartments and homes

- 3. Closing the gap
  - Housing supply and demand

- 4. Benefits of increased spending
  - Access to safe, stable shelters
  - Costs below market rates

- 5. Government action and responsibility fulfillment 

- 6. Conclusion 

9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionSimplified Chinese TranslationSample Sentence
housing shortage/ˈhaʊzɪŋ/ /ˈʃɔrtɪdʒ/noun phrasea lack of available homes or apartments for people to live in房屋短缺The government must address the housing shortage in our country.
investment/ɪnˈvɛstmənt/nounthe act of putting money, effort, time, etc., into something to make a profit or get an advantage, or the money, effort, time, etc., used to do this投资Increasing investment in public housing projects can help solve the problem.
public sector/ˈpʌblɪk/ /ˈsɛktər/noun phrasethe part of an economy that is controlled by the government and its agencies rather than by private companies or individuals; often refers to government-funded services and industries such as education, healthcare, and public transportation systems.公共部门(政府部门)The public sector can help close the gap between housing supply and demand.
affordable/əˈfɔrdəbəl/adjectiveinexpensive; reasonably priced负担得起的,价格适中的Affordable apartments and homes are essential for citizens.
construction/kənˈstrʌkʃən/nounthe process of building something, especially a large structure such as a house, bridge, or road建筑,建设Direct funding for construction can help increase the number of available homes.
supply and demand/səˈplaɪ/ /ænd/ /dɪˈmænd/noun phrasethe amount of goods available to be bought compared with the amount that people want to buy; often used to explain how prices are determined in a market economy供求关系The government needs to balance housing supply and demand.
stable shelter/ˈsteɪbəl/ /ˈʃɛltər/noun phrasea safe and secure place to live or stay in, especially during difficult times or conditions稳定的住所Increased spending on public housing allows more families access to safe, stable shelters.
market rates/ˈmɑrkɪt/ /reɪts/noun phrasethe current price or value of something in a competitive marketplace, often used as a benchmark for determining appropriate prices for goods or services市场价格Public housing projects can provide homes at costs below current market rates.
responsibility/rɪˌspɒnsəˈbɪlɪti/noun 1.something that it is your job or duty to deal with 2.the state of having control over and being in charge of someone or something责任

アカデミック・ディスカッションの採点方法

TOEFLアカデミック・ディスカッションのタスクは、ETS公式の採点基準に基づいて評価されます。AI評価は各回答を複数の観点から分析します。

関連性と貢献度

設問に的確に答え、ディスカッションに意味のある貢献をしているか?

言語使用

文法の正確さ、語彙の幅、文構造の質。

展開と裏付け

具体例と明確な論理によってアイデアが十分に展開されているか?

回答に見られる共通パターン

このタスクに寄せられたユーザー投稿の分析に基づき、受験者の回答に見られる共通パターンを紹介します。

多くの受験者は明確な意見を述べるものの、具体的な裏付け例が不足している。

高評価の回答は、リーディングパッセージや他の参加者の意見に直接言及している。

高得点の回答は、多様な文構造とアカデミックな語彙を使用している。

時間配分は重要な要素であり、急いで書かれた印象の回答は展開の評価が低くなる傾向がある。

学習のヒント

1

書き始める前に設問文を注意深く読み、質問のすべての要素を把握する。

2

回答の中でリーディングパッセージや他の受験者の意見に言及する。

3

主張を裏付けるために具体例を使い、一般論は避ける。

4

120~150語を目安にする。長い回答が必ずしも良いわけではなく、明確さと焦点の方が重要。

5

本番同様の条件で流暢さを養うため、時間を計って(10分間)回答する練習をする。

よくある質問

TOEFLのAcademic Discussionタスクとは何ですか?
TOEFLのAcademic Discussionタスクでは、オンラインの授業ディスカッションに参加することが求められます。教授の質問と他の学生の回答を読んだ上で、約10分以内に自分の意見を述べ、それを裏付ける投稿を作成します。
Academic Discussionタスクはどのように採点されますか?
このタスクは0〜5点の尺度で採点され、ディスカッションとの関連性、言語使用の質(文法、語彙、文構造)、そして具体的な例と論理的な根拠を用いてどれだけ考えを展開・裏付けできているかが評価基準となります。
このページに表示されているユーザーサンプルとは何ですか?
これらは、LingoLeap上でこの問題を練習した実際のTOEFL受験者から提出された回答です。各サンプルは当社のAI採点エンジンによって評価されており、スコアと、強みや改善点に関する詳細なフィードバックが提供されます。
AI評価の精度はどの程度ですか?
LingoLeapのAI評価エンジンは、ETSの公式採点基準をもとにトレーニングされ、人間の採点者のスコアと照合して調整されています。自動採点システムに完璧なものはありませんが、練習用として信頼できるフィードバックを提供し、具体的な改善点を特定するのに役立ちます。
このAcademic Discussionタスクをどうやって練習できますか?
無料のLingoLeapアカウントに登録することで練習できます。まさにこの質問に対する自分の回答を書いて提出すると、文章に関する詳細なフィードバック付きのAI評価をすぐに受け取ることができます。
Academic Discussionの回答はどのくらいの長さにすべきですか?
120〜150語を目安にしてください。このタスクでは回答を書くための時間が10分与えられます。より長い回答を書くことよりも、明確さ、具体的な例による意見の裏付け、ディスカッションの文脈への言及を重視してください。

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