TOEFL TPO 9 Writing Task 1 Sample: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on specific points made in the reading passage.

1.Sub Scores:

• Task fulfillment: 0

• Organization: 0

• Coherence and Cohesion: 0

• Language Use: 0

2.Estimated Scores:

0. 3.Task completeness:

The essay does not address the specific requirements of the task. It is incomplete and does not summarize the points made in the lecture or explain how they cast doubt on specific points made in the reading passage. To improve, you should:

• Begin with an introduction that briefly introduces the topic and states that the lecture casts doubt on the reading passage's claims.

• Write a body paragraph for each point made in the lecture, explaining how it contradicts or challenges a corresponding point from the reading passage.

• Conclude by summarizing how the lecture casts doubt on the reading passage's claims.

Example 1: Introduction: The reading passage discusses the potential benefits of hydrogen-based fuel-cell engines as an alternative to internal-combustion engines. However, the lecture casts doubt on these claims by presenting several counterarguments.

Example 2: Body Paragraph: The first point made in the lecture is that hydrogen is not as easily available as claimed in the reading passage. Producing pure liquid hydrogen requires complex technology and energy-intensive processes, which contradicts the assertion that hydrogen is a practical and easily available substance.

4.Essay structure and organization: The essay lacks structure and organization. To improve, you should:

• Follow a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs for each point discussed, and a conclusion.

• Ensure each paragraph focuses on one specific point from either the reading or listening passages.

• Use clear transitions between ideas and paragraphs to guide readers through your essay.

Example 1: Transition between paragraphs: While the reading passage claims that hydrogen-based fuel cells will solve pollution problems, this idea is challenged by the lecture. (Begin discussing pollution-related counterargument from lecture)

Example 2: Conclusion: In conclusion, the lecture presents several counterarguments that cast doubt on the reading passage's claims about the benefits of hydrogen-based fuel-cell engines. By addressing issues related to hydrogen availability, pollution, and cost, the lecture effectively challenges the optimistic view presented in the reading passage.

5. Grammar

The reading argues that

6. Revised Essay

The reading argues that hydrogen-based fuel-cell engines are a promising alternative to internal-combustion engines, offering advantages such as renewable resources, reduced pollution, and economic competitiveness. However, the lecture casts doubt on these claims by presenting counterarguments that highlight the challenges and limitations of fuel-cell technology.

Firstly, the reading states that hydrogen is an easily available and renewable resource, derived from sources like natural gas and water. In contrast, the lecture contends that obtaining pure liquid hydrogen for fuel-cell engines is a complex process. It requires advanced technology to produce and store liquid hydrogen at extremely low temperatures (minus 253 degrees Celsius). This suggests that hydrogen may not be as practical or readily accessible as the reading implies.

Secondly, the reading claims that hydrogen-based fuel cells will help solve pollution problems since their only byproduct is water. However, the lecture points out that producing pure hydrogen generates significant pollution. The purification process necessitates large amounts of energy obtained from burning coal or oil, which in turn creates pollution. Thus, while fuel-cell cars themselves may not pollute directly, the production of hydrogen for these vehicles would still contribute to environmental degradation.

Lastly, the reading asserts that fuel-cell engines will soon be economically competitive due to their higher efficiency compared to internal-combustion engines. The lecture challenges this assertion by highlighting the high manufacturing costs associated with fuel-cell technology. Fuel-cell engines require platinum components for the chemical reaction needed to generate electricity. Platinum is a rare and expensive metal; efforts to find a cheaper alternative have been unsuccessful thus far. Consequently, any potential cost savings from increased efficiency could be offset by these high production costs.

In conclusion, although hydrogen-based fuel cells appear promising in theory as an alternative energy source for automobiles, the lecture raises valid concerns regarding their practicality, environmental impact, and economic feasibility—effectively casting doubt on the optimistic claims presented in the reading passage. (316 words)

6. Revised Essay

The reading argues thatthat hydrogen-based fuel-cell engines are a promising alternative to internal-combustion engines, offering advantages such as renewable resources, reduced pollution, and economic competitiveness (revised for clarity and cohesion). However, the lecture casts doubt on these claims by presenting counterarguments that highlight the challenges and limitations of fuel-cell technology (revised to emphasize the contrasting viewpoints).

Firstly, the reading states that hydrogen is an easily available and renewable resource, derived from sources like natural gas and water (revised for conciseness). In contrast, the lecture contends that obtaining pure liquid hydrogen for fuel-cell engines is a complex process (revised to emphasize contrast). It requires advanced technology to produce and store liquid hydrogen at extremely low temperatures (minus 253 degrees Celsius) (added specific detail). This suggests that hydrogen may not be as practical or readily accessible as the reading implies (clarified conclusion).

Secondly, the reading claims that hydrogen-based fuel cells will help solve pollution problems since their only byproduct is water (revised for clarity). However, the lecture points out that producing pure hydrogen generates significant pollution (emphasized contrast). The purification process necessitates large amounts of energy obtained from burning coal or oil, which in turn creates pollution (added specific details). Thus, while fuel-cell cars themselves may not pollute directly, the production of hydrogen for these vehicles would still contribute to environmental degradation (clarified conclusion).

Lastly, the reading asserts that fuel-cell engines will soon be economically competitive due to their higher efficiency compared to internal-combustion engines (revised for clarity). The lecture challenges this assertion by highlighting the high manufacturing costs associated with fuel-cell technology (emphasized contrast). Fuel-cell engines require platinum components for the chemical reaction needed to generate electricity. Platinum is a rare and expensive metal; efforts to find a cheaper alternative have been unsuccessful thus far (added specific details). Consequently, any potential cost savings from increased efficiency could be offset by these high production costs (clarified conclusion).

In conclusion, although hydrogen-based fuel cells appear promising in theory as an alternative energy source for automobiles, the lecture raises valid concerns regarding their practicality, environmental impact, and economic feasibility—effectively casting doubt on the optimistic claims presented in the reading passage (revised for clarity and cohesion).

8. Mind Map

- Introduction
    - Reading: Hydrogen fuel cells as a promising alternative
    - Lecture: Challenges and limitations of fuel-cell technology

- Availability and Renewability
    - Reading: Hydrogen from natural gas and water
    - Lecture: Complex process to produce and store liquid hydrogen

- Pollution Reduction
    - Reading: Fuel cells only produce water as a byproduct
    - Lecture: Pollution generated during hydrogen production

- Economic Competitiveness
    - Reading: Higher efficiency compared to internal-combustion engines
    - Lecture: High manufacturing costs due to platinum components

- Conclusion
    - Lecture casts doubt on the optimistic claims in the reading passage

9. Key Words