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TOEFL Academic Discussion Writing Sample: Your professor is teaching a class on business administration. Write a postresponding to the professor's question.

AIによる評価とフィードバック付きの実際のユーザー投稿

2件のユーザー投稿サンプルがあります

無料練習を始める

タスク概要

Professor

A new story about Artificial Intelligence (Al) is in the news almost every day. And of course, companies are spending an enormous amount of money to develop new technologies related to A. Before next class, I want you to consider the following question: ls Al a dangerous technology that, overall, will be harmful to society, or is it a powerful tool that will improve the lives of people?

Student A

Personally. I think Al is a threat to society. As Al technology advances many jobs may become automated, leaving people without work and that will certainly increase increase income inequailty. Additionally. there's the risk that Al systems could be programmed with biases or used to discriminate against certain groups. We need to be careful and ensure that Al developed in an ethical and responsible way. Since we can't guarantee that right now, I think it is best to slow down when it comes to this kind of technology.

Student B

disagree with Megan. I'm of the opinion that Al is a tool for progress. It has the potential to solve many of the world's problems, from climate change to disease. Additionally. AI can help us make better decisions by analyzing vast amounts of data and identifying patterns that humans may miss. That said. l agree with Megan that we must ensure that Al is developed and used in a responsible way that benefits society as a whole.

ユーザーサンプルと評価結果

1

ユーザーサンプル #1

In my opinion, AI is an effective tool which can enhance the people’s working efficiency. To be more specific, It’s quite efficient for workers usin...

スコア
27

ユーザーサンプル

In my opinion, AI is an effective tool which can enhance the people’s working efficiency. To be more specific, It’s quite efficient for workers using generative AI to collect and sort out the information and data in today’s exploding information era. AI also has a strong ability to help workers to analyze vast amounts of data. For instance, as I’m an architecture student, we always do some site analysis and data collection at the beginning of a new design project, which benefits the development of later design concept. But as there are a large amount of information and data of the site we searching on the Internet, we can’t precisely find out and sum up the most useful information in a short time, we are always given a very short period of time. However, if we use AI to search the information, it can give us the feedback as soon as possible based on the prompt we give, which reduces the time we scan on the irrelevant information the website offered. We always consider it as a helpful assistant. Still, some people think AI replaces the job that some people hold. However, by liberating the productive forces, human will have a role to play in every social sector by showing off creativity and imagination.

評価結果

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0

  • Language Use and Grammar: 4.0

2. 预估分数

  • 27

3. 任务完成度

总体来说,你的文章回答了教授的问题,并表达了自己对人工智能的看法。然而,为了更好地完成任务,你可以在以下方面进行改进:

  1. 更具体地提供支持观点的例子和细节;

  2. 对于不同观点进行对比和讨论,以便更全面地参与讨论。

示例1:在提到AI帮助建筑学生时,可以详细描述一个实际项目中AI如何节省时间并提高效率。 示例2:在讨论AI可能取代工作岗位时,可以引用一些研究数据或者具体案例来支持你的观点。

4. 文章结构与组织

文章结构基本清晰,但可以在以下方面进行改进:

  1. 在开头部分明确指出文章将讨论哪些方面;

  2. 在段落之间使用过渡词或短语来增强连贯性。

示例1:在引言中添加一句话:“本文将从AI提高工作效率和可能取代人类工作这两个方面来探讨这个问题。” 示例2:在不同观点之间添加过渡词,如:“尽管有人认为AI会取代人类的工作,但从另一个角度来看,AI的发展实际上可以激发人类的创造力和想象力。”

5. 语法批改

In my opinion, AI is an effective tool which can enhance the people’s working efficiency.

To be more specific, It’s quite efficient for workers using generative AI to collect and sort out the information and data in today’s exploding information era. AI also has a strong ability to help workers to analyze vast amounts of data.

For instance, as I’m an architecture student, we always do some site analysis and data collection at the beginning of a new design project, which benefits the development of laterthe later(This rule identifies whether the article 'the' is missing in a sentence.) design concept. But as there are a large amount of information and data of the site we searchingwe're searching(He going (He is going)) on the Internet, we can’t precisely find out and sum up the most useful information in a short time, we are (Two consecutive spaces)always given a very short period of time. However, if we use AI to search the information, it can give us the feedback as soon as possible based on the prompt we give, which reduces the time we scan on the irrelevant information the website offered. We always consider it as a helpful assistant.

Still, some people think AI replaces the job that some people hold. However, by liberating the productive forces, human will have a role to play in every social sector by showing off creativity and imagination.

Title: 6 文章修订

In my opinion, AI serves as an effective tool that can significantly enhance people's work efficiency.

To elaborate, utilizing generative AI for information and data collection proves to be highly efficient in today's rapidly expanding information era. AI possesses a remarkable ability to assist workers in analyzing vast amounts of data.

For example, as an architecture student, we often conduct site analysis and data collection at the onset of a new design project, which contributes to the development of subsequent design concepts. However, given the vast amount of information available online and the limited time we have, it is challenging to accurately identify and summarize the most relevant information quickly. By employing AI for information retrieval, we can receive prompt feedback based on our queries, reducing time spent sifting through irrelevant content. In this regard, AI serves as a valuable assistant.

Admittedly, some argue that AI may replace jobs currently held by humans. Nonetheless, by liberating productive forces, humans will continue to play essential roles across various social sectors by showcasing their creativity and imagination. (178 words)

Title: 7 文章批改

In my opinion, AI is serves as an effective tool which that can significantly enhance the people’s working efficiency. people's work efficiency (revised for clarity and natural tone).

To elaborate, utilizing generative AI for information and data collection proves to be more specific, It’s quite highly efficient for in today's rapidly expanding information era (revised for natural tone). AI possesses a remarkable ability to assist workers using generative AI to collect and sort out the information and data in today’s exploding information era. AI also has a strong ability to help workers to analyze analyzing vast amounts of data. data (maintained original text).

For instance, example, as I’m an architecture student, we always do some often conduct site analysis and data collection at the beginning onset of a new design project, which benefits contributes to the development of later subsequent design concept. But as there are a large concepts (revised for clarity). However, given the vast amount of information and data of the site available online and the limited time we searching on the Internet, have, it is challenging to accurately identify and summarize the most relevant information quickly (revised for natural tone). By employing AI for information retrieval, we can’t precisely find out and sum up the most useful information in a short time, we are always given a very short period of time. However, if we use AI to search the information, it can give us the receive prompt feedback as soon as possible based on the prompt we give, which reduces the our queries, reducing time we scan on the spent sifting through irrelevant information the website offered. We always consider it content (revised for clarity). In this regard, AI serves as a helpful assistant. ¶ Still, valuable assistant (maintained original text).

Admittedly, some people think AI replaces the job argue that some people hold. However, AI may replace jobs currently held by humans. Nonetheless, by liberating the productive forces, human humans will have a role continue to play in every essential roles across various social sector sectors by showing off showcasing their creativity and imagination.imagination (revised for natural tone).

8 思维导图


- AI作为有效工具
    - 提高工作效率

- 生成性AI在信息和数据收集中的应用
    - 高效的数据分析能力

- 示例:建筑学生进行场地分析和数据收集
    - AI帮助快速获取相关信息

- AI作为有价值的助手
    - 减少无关内容筛选时间

- 承认AI可能取代人类工作岗位的观点
    - 但人类在各个领域依然具有创造力和想象力

9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish definitionSimplified Chinese translationSample sentences
enhance/ɪnˈhæns/verbto increase or improve in value, quality, or power提高,增强AI can significantly enhance people's work efficiency.
generative/ˈdʒenərətɪv/adjectivecapable of producing or creating something生成性的Utilizing generative AI for information and data collection proves to be efficient.
vast/væst/adjectivevery large in size, amount, or extent巨大的AI possesses a remarkable ability to assist workers in analyzing vast amounts of data.
site analysis/saɪt/ /əˈnælɪsɪs/nounthe process of studying the conditions of a location场地分析As an architecture student, we often conduct site analysis at the onset of a new design project.
retrieval/rɪˈtriːvəl/nounthe process of getting something back检索By employing AI for information retrieval, we can receive prompt feedback based on our queries.
prompt/prɒmpt/adjectivedone without delay; immediate及时的AI helps us receive prompt feedback based on our queries.
liberating/ˈlɪbəreɪtɪŋ/adjectivesetting free from restrictions or control解放的By liberating productive forces, humans will continue to play essential roles across various social sectors.
creativity/kriːeɪˈtɪvəti/nounthe ability to produce original and unusual ideas创造力Humans will showcase their creativity and imagination in various fields.
imagination/ɪˌmædʒɪˈneɪʃən/nounthe ability to form pictures or ideas in your mind想象力Humans will continue to play essential roles by showcasing their creativity and imagination.
2

ユーザーサンプル #2

Well personally speaking I strongly agree with the statement created by Andrew. Firstly, I think the company should hire more skilled people.Because ...

スコア
22

ユーザーサンプル

Well personally speaking I strongly agree with the statement created by Andrew. Firstly, I think the company should hire more skilled people.Because hiring people costed a lot, so company should hire skilled people insteading of spending money on teaching people about the working skill. To spending money on teaching people about the working skill is not only a kind of time wasted but also waste of money. And more importantly, companies do have a lot of implict cost, so they need to spend their money on something that is useful. So, those are the reasons why I agree with the statement from Andrew.

評価結果

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.0

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5

  • Language Use and Grammar: 3.5

2. 预估分数

22. 3 任务完成度

虽然你的文章回答了教授的问题并表达了自己的观点,但是在支持观点和详细阐述方面还有待提高。首先,你需要更具体地解释为什么雇佣更多技能人才比培训现有员工更重要。此外,你可以给出一些具体的例子来支持你的观点。

Example 1: Instead of "Because hiring people costed a lot," you could write, "Hiring skilled employees is crucial because the initial investment in their recruitment can save the company money in the long run by reducing the need for extensive training."

Example 2: Instead of "To spending money on teaching people about the working skill is not only a kind of time wasted but also waste of money," you could write, "Investing in employee training can be time-consuming and costly, especially when considering that employees may leave the company after receiving this training."

4. 文章结构与组织

从组织结构上看,你的文章缺乏清晰的引言、主体和结论。在撰写文章时,请确保每个段落都集中讨论一个特定的观点,并提供相应的支持细节。同时,请使用明确的过渡词汇来连接不同的观点和段落。

Example 1: Add an introduction: "In response to the professor's question about the importance of employee training, I believe that hiring skilled employees should be a company's top priority rather than investing heavily in ongoing training."

Example 2: Improve transitions between ideas: "While it is true that companies have many other expenses to consider, prioritizing the recruitment of skilled employees can lead to long-term benefits. For instance, a well-trained workforce can increase productivity and reduce the need for additional training costs."

5. 语法批改

WellSure, here is the text with corrections for grammar and spelling: Well, personally speakingspeaking, I strongly agree with the statement createdmade by Andrew. Firstly, I think the company should hire more skilled people.Becausepeople. Because hiring people costedcosts a lot, so company should hire skilled people insteadinginstead of spending money on teaching people about the working skill.skills. To spendingspend money on teaching people about the working skillskills is not only a kindwaste of time wasted but also waste of money. AndEven more importantly, companies do have a lot of implict cost,implicit costs, so they need to spend their money on something that is useful. So, those are the reasons why I agree with the statement from Andrew.

Title: 6 文章修订

In my opinion, I concur with Andrew's perspective on the matter of employee training and its importance in a company.

Firstly, I believe that companies should prioritize hiring highly skilled individuals. The recruitment process can be costly, and it is more efficient for a company to hire skilled workers rather than investing in extensive training for less experienced employees. Allocating resources to develop work skills may not only consume valuable time but also divert funds from other crucial aspects of the business. Furthermore, companies often face numerous implicit costs, necessitating prudent financial management and prioritization of expenditures.

However, it is essential to acknowledge that continuous employee training can contribute positively to the employer-employee relationship. When companies invest in their workforce's skill development, employees are likely to feel valued and appreciated, fostering loyalty and job satisfaction. In this regard, striking a balance between hiring skilled workers and providing ongoing training opportunities becomes crucial for businesses aiming to thrive in today's competitive market. (164 words)

Well personally speaking I strongly In my opinion, I concur with Andrew's perspective (I rephrased "strongly agree with the statement created by Andrew. Andrew" to make it sound more natural) on the matter of employee training and its importance in a company.

Firstly, I think the believe that companies should prioritize hiring highly skilled individuals (I replaced "more skilled people" with "highly skilled individuals" for better word choice). The recruitment process can be costly, and it is more efficient for a company should to hire skilled workers rather than investing in extensive training for less experienced employees (I restructured this sentence to make it clearer and more skilled people.Because hiring people costed a lot, so company should hire skilled people insteading of spending money on teaching people about the working skill. To spending money on teaching people about the working skill is concise). Allocating resources to develop work skills may not only a kind of consume valuable time wasted but also waste divert funds from other crucial aspects of money. And more importantly, the business (I revised this sentence for clarity and conciseness). Furthermore, companies do have a lot often face numerous implicit costs, necessitating prudent financial management and prioritization of implict cost, so they need to spend expenditures (I rephrased this sentence to improve its flow).

However, it is essential to acknowledge that continuous employee training can contribute positively to the employer-employee relationship (I added this sentence to provide a balanced view on the topic). When companies invest in their money on something that is useful. ¶ So, those workforce's skill development, employees are the reasons why I agree with the statement from Andrew.likely to feel valued and appreciated, fostering loyalty and job satisfaction (I revised this sentence for clarity). In this regard, striking a balance between hiring skilled workers and providing ongoing training opportunities becomes crucial for businesses aiming to thrive in today's competitive market (I rephrased this sentence to conclude the paragraph effectively).

Title: 8 思维导图


1. Employee Training
   1.1 Importance in a company
   1.2 Andrew's perspective

2. Hiring Skilled Workers
   2.1 Efficient recruitment process
   2.2 Cost and resource allocation

3. Continuous Training Benefits
   3.1 Employer-employee relationship
   3.2 Loyalty and job satisfaction

4. Striking a Balance
   4.1 Skilled workers and ongoing training opportunities
   4.2 Thriving in a competitive market

Title: 9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionSimplified Chinese TranslationSample Sentence
prioritize/praɪˈɒrɪtaɪz/verbTo arrange or deal with in order of importance优先考虑Companies should prioritize hiring highly skilled individuals.
recruitment/rɪˈkruːtmənt/nounThe process of finding people to work for a company招聘The recruitment process can be costly for a company.
implicit/ɪmˈplɪsɪt/adjectiveSuggested without being directly expressed含蓄的Companies often face numerous implicit costs, necessitating prudent financial management.
continuous/kənˈtɪnjuəs/adjectiveUninterrupted, unbroken │连续的 │Continuous employee training can contribute positively to the employer-employee relationship.
skill development/skɪl dɪˈvɛləpmənt/nounThe process of improving abilities and competencies技能发展Companies should invest in their workforce's skill development.
loyalty/ˈlɔɪəlti/nounA strong feeling of support or allegiance忠诚Investing in training can foster loyalty among employees.
job satisfaction/dʒɒb sætɪsˈfækʃən/nounThe extent to which a person is content with their job │工作满意度 │Continuous training can lead to increased job satisfaction.
thrive/θraɪv/verbTo grow, develop, or be successful │繁荣,兴旺 │Businesses need to strike a balance between hiring skilled workers and providing ongoing training opportunities to thrive in today's competitive market.
competitive market/kəmˈpɛtɪtɪv ˈmɑrkət/nounA market where businesses compete for customers │竞争市场 │Striking a balance between hiring skilled workers and providing ongoing training opportunities is crucial for thriving in a competitive market.

アカデミック・ディスカッションの採点方法

TOEFLアカデミック・ディスカッションのタスクは、ETS公式の採点基準に基づいて評価されます。AI評価は各回答を複数の観点から分析します。

関連性と貢献度

設問に的確に答え、ディスカッションに意味のある貢献をしているか?

言語使用

文法の正確さ、語彙の幅、文構造の質。

展開と裏付け

具体例と明確な論理によってアイデアが十分に展開されているか?

回答に見られる共通パターン

このタスクに寄せられたユーザー投稿の分析に基づき、受験者の回答に見られる共通パターンを紹介します。

多くの受験者は明確な意見を述べるものの、具体的な裏付け例が不足している。

高評価の回答は、リーディングパッセージや他の参加者の意見に直接言及している。

高得点の回答は、多様な文構造とアカデミックな語彙を使用している。

時間配分は重要な要素であり、急いで書かれた印象の回答は展開の評価が低くなる傾向がある。

学習のヒント

1

書き始める前に設問文を注意深く読み、質問のすべての要素を把握する。

2

回答の中でリーディングパッセージや他の受験者の意見に言及する。

3

主張を裏付けるために具体例を使い、一般論は避ける。

4

120~150語を目安にする。長い回答が必ずしも良いわけではなく、明確さと焦点の方が重要。

5

本番同様の条件で流暢さを養うため、時間を計って(10分間)回答する練習をする。

よくある質問

TOEFLのAcademic Discussionタスクとは何ですか?
TOEFLのAcademic Discussionタスクでは、オンラインの授業ディスカッションに参加することが求められます。教授の質問と他の学生の回答を読んだ上で、約10分以内に自分の意見を述べ、それを裏付ける投稿を作成します。
Academic Discussionタスクはどのように採点されますか?
このタスクは0〜5点の尺度で採点され、ディスカッションとの関連性、言語使用の質(文法、語彙、文構造)、そして具体的な例と論理的な根拠を用いてどれだけ考えを展開・裏付けできているかが評価基準となります。
このページに表示されているユーザーサンプルとは何ですか?
これらは、LingoLeap上でこの問題を練習した実際のTOEFL受験者から提出された回答です。各サンプルは当社のAI採点エンジンによって評価されており、スコアと、強みや改善点に関する詳細なフィードバックが提供されます。
AI評価の精度はどの程度ですか?
LingoLeapのAI評価エンジンは、ETSの公式採点基準をもとにトレーニングされ、人間の採点者のスコアと照合して調整されています。自動採点システムに完璧なものはありませんが、練習用として信頼できるフィードバックを提供し、具体的な改善点を特定するのに役立ちます。
このAcademic Discussionタスクをどうやって練習できますか?
無料のLingoLeapアカウントに登録することで練習できます。まさにこの質問に対する自分の回答を書いて提出すると、文章に関する詳細なフィードバック付きのAI評価をすぐに受け取ることができます。
Academic Discussionの回答はどのくらいの長さにすべきですか?
120〜150語を目安にしてください。このタスクでは回答を書くための時間が10分与えられます。より長い回答を書くことよりも、明確さ、具体的な例による意見の裏付け、ディスカッションの文脈への言及を重視してください。

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