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TOEFL Academic Discussion Writing Sample: Your professor is teaching a class on business. Write a post responding to the professor’s question. In your response you should: • express and support your personal opinion • make a contribution to the discussion in your own words An effective response will contain at least 100 words.

Bài nộp thực tế của người dùng với đánh giá và phản hồi bằng AI

Có 3 bài mẫu do người dùng gửi

Bắt Đầu Luyện Tập Miễn Phí

Tổng Quan Dạng Bài

Dr. Diaz

We are all exposed to a lot of advertising, especially on the internet. And of course businesses spend a lot of money to create and distribute advertising. Before next class, I would like for you to discuss this question: Is advertising just a way of manipulating people to buy things they do not need, or is it an important source of information that helps people make informed consumer decisions?

Karen

I don’t think most people consider ads to be valuable. I read that in just one one year, from 2018 to 2019, the number of computers, tablets and and mobile phones using ad blockers increased from 142 million to 615 million.

Brad

People can find out a lot about products from advertising. There’s plenty of evidence that people usually begin the process of making a big purchase by looking at ads and reviews. I have to go to another class right now, but I’m going to post later about an advertisement that gave me a lot of useful information.

Bài Mẫu Của Người Dùng & Kết Quả Đánh Giá

1

Bài Mẫu Của Người Dùng #1

In my perspective, I am a firmly believer that advertising is an essential measure to control people buying unnecessary products. As technology advanc...

Điểm Số
22

Bài Mẫu Của Người Dùng

In my perspective, I am a firmly believer that advertising is an essential measure to control people buying unnecessary products. As technology advances, the Internet appears to be a new way to buy goods, online shopping. As for individuals, they are often drawn the attention and addicted to the video on the phone, and when the advertising promotion of the good in the short video, which could enhance assessments that the product works with authenticity and folks are desire to buy unreasonably. However, the assements have probably be counterfeited by merchants, which will mislead individuals to have impractical and useless goods, such as the functions of some make-up.

Kết Quả Đánh Giá

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.0

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5

  • Language Use and Grammar: 3.5

2. 预估分数

22. 3 任务完成度

此篇文章在回答问题时,表达了作者对广告的看法,但在支持观点方面略显不足。为了提高文章质量,建议在论述中加入更多具体的例子和细节来支持观点。同时,在讨论广告的正面作用时,可以更全面地考虑问题。

示例1:在支持观点时,可以举例说明某种广告如何误导消费者购买不实用的产品。 示例2:在讨论广告的正面作用时,可以提到广告如何帮助消费者了解新产品和服务。

4. 文章结构与组织

文章结构方面有待改进。建议使用引言、主体和结论的结构来组织文章。每个段落应集中讨论一个特定观点,并提供支持细节。此外,在段落之间应使用明确的过渡词来连接思路。

示例1:在引言部分,可以简要介绍互联网广告对消费者行为的影响,并提出自己的观点。 示例2:在主体部分,可以分别讨论广告误导消费者和广告对消费者的正面影响,每个段落都应提供具体的例子和细节来支持观点。

5. 语法批改

In my perspective, I am a firmly believerfirm believer(Adverb instead of an adjective) that advertising is an essential measure to control people buying unnecessary products. As technology advances, the Internet appears to be a new way to buy goods, online shopping. As for individuals, they are often drawn the attention and addicted to the video on the phone, and when the advertising promotion of the good in the short video, which could enhance assessments that the product works with authenticity and folks are desire to buy unreasonably. However, the assementsassessments(misspelling) have probably bebeen(Agreement: 'have' + past/present tense) counterfeited by merchants, which will mislead individuals to have impractical and useless goods, such as the functions of some make-up.

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

In my opinion, advertising plays a crucial role in influencing consumer behavior, often leading to the purchase of unnecessary products. With the advent of technology and the rise of online shopping, individuals are constantly exposed to advertisements through various digital platforms. These ads, often embedded within engaging content, can create a sense of authenticity and urgency that entices consumers to make impulsive purchases. However, it is important to note that some advertisers may resort to deceptive practices, such as fabricating reviews or exaggerating product features, which ultimately mislead consumers into acquiring impractical and ineffective items. Consequently, while advertising can provide valuable information about products and services, it is essential for consumers to exercise caution and critical thinking when making purchasing decisions. (126 words)

In my perspective, I am opinion (revised for a firmly believer that more natural tone), advertising is an essential measure plays a crucial role (changed "essential measure" to control people buying "crucial role" for clarity) in influencing consumer behavior, often leading to the purchase of unnecessary products. As With the advent of technology advances, (rephrased for better flow) and the Internet appears rise of online shopping, individuals are constantly exposed to be advertisements through various digital platforms. These ads, often embedded within engaging content, can create a new way to buy goods, online shopping. As for individuals, they are often drawn the attention and addicted to the video on the phone, and when the advertising promotion sense of the good in the short video, which could enhance assessments that the product works with authenticity and folks are desire urgency (rephrased for clarity) that entices consumers to buy unreasonably. make impulsive purchases. However, the assements have probably be counterfeited by merchants, it is important to note that some advertisers may resort to deceptive practices (rephrased for better flow), such as fabricating reviews or exaggerating product features, which will ultimately mislead individuals to have consumers into acquiring impractical and useless goods, such as the functions of some make-up.ineffective items (rephrased for clarity). Consequently, while advertising can provide valuable information about products and services, it is essential for consumers to exercise caution and critical thinking when making purchasing decisions (rephrased for better flow).

8 思维导图


- Advertising
    - Influencing consumer behavior
        - Purchase of unnecessary products
    - Technology and online shopping
        - Exposure to advertisements on digital platforms
            - Embedded within engaging content
                - Authenticity and urgency
                    - Impulsive purchases
    - Deceptive practices
        - Fabricating reviews or exaggerating product features
            - Misleading consumers into acquiring impractical items
    - Importance of caution and critical thinking in purchasing decisions

9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionSimplified Chinese TranslationSample Sentence
Advertising/ˈædvərˌtaɪzɪŋ/NounThe activity of promoting goods or services广告Advertising plays a crucial role in influencing consumer behavior.
Consumer behavior/kənˈsjuːmər bɪˈheɪvjər/NounThe way people buy, use, and dispose of goods or services消费者行为Advertising has a significant impact on consumer behavior.
Impulsive/ɪmˈpʌlsɪv/AdjectiveActing without forethought or deliberation冲动的These ads can lead to impulsive purchases.
Deceptive/dɪˈsɛptɪv/Adjective_Misleading or dishonest_欺骗性的_Some advertisers may resort to deceptive practices.
Fabricate/fəˈbrɪkeɪt/Verb_To create or invent something false_捏造_Advertisers may fabricate reviews to promote their products.
Exaggerate/ɪgˈzædʒəreɪt/Verb_To represent something as larger or greater than it actually is_夸大_Advertisers may exaggerate product features to attract consumers.
Authenticity/əˌθɛnˈtɪsɪti/Noun_The quality of being genuine or true_真实性_Ads embedded within engaging content can create a sense of authenticity.
Urgency/ˈɜrdʒənsi/Noun_The quality of requiring immediate action or attention_紧迫性_These ads can create a sense of urgency, leading to impulsive purchases.
Critical thinking/ˈkrɪtɪkəl ˈθɪŋkɪŋ/NounThe objective analysis and evaluation of an issue in order to form a judgment批判性思维It is essential for consumers to exercise critical thinking when making purchasing decisions.
2

Bài Mẫu Của Người Dùng #2

Admittedly, it is undeniable that ads. could be a comprehensive approach to help them make decision or buy a product. However, the benefits of adverti...

Điểm Số
22

Bài Mẫu Của Người Dùng

Admittedly, it is undeniable that ads. could be a comprehensive approach to help them make decision or buy a product. However, the benefits of advertisement pale into insignificance when set against drawbacks. In my opinion, advertisement always exaggerate and optimize the product in order to increase sales. It is common that companies would utilize manipulative tactics to induce potential consumers' purchasing behavior, which keeps them from thinking in a rational way. Instead, they make buying choice by emotional response. For example, vacuum cleaner always attract individuals by compelling visual evidence. The company generally advertise that it could tackle stubborn stains, like grease and leftovers. What’s more,

Kết Quả Đánh Giá

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.0

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5

  • Language Use and Grammar: 3.5

2. 预估分数

22. 3 任务完成度

你的文章在回答问题方面做得不错,但还有一些地方需要改进。首先,你需要更具体地说明广告如何操纵人们的购买行为。此外,你可以举出更多关于广告对消费者决策的影响的例子。最后,文章结尾部分不完整,需要加以完善。

示例1:在广告中,公司常常利用心理学原理来吸引消费者,例如使用名人代言、营造紧迫感等手段。 示例2:然而,在某些情况下,广告也能提供有关产品特点和优势的实用信息,帮助消费者作出明智的选择。

4. 文章结构与组织

从文章结构和组织方面来看,你的文章还有待改进。首先,在引言部分简要介绍论点,并明确表达自己的观点。其次,在正文部分详细阐述观点,并使用恰当的例子进行支持。最后,在结论部分总结观点,并呼应引言中提出的问题。

示例1: 引言:广告在当今社会无处不在,尽管它们为消费者提供了一定程度的信息,但我认为广告更多地是在操纵人们购买他们并不需要的东西。

示例2: 结论:总之,虽然广告在某种程度上有助于消费者了解产品信息,但其操纵性质使得消费者很难做出理性的购买决策。因此,我们应该保持警惕,并学会分辨广告中的真实与虚假。

5. 语法批改

Admittedly, it is undeniable that ads. couldCould(Checks that a sentence starts with an uppercase letter) be a comprehensive approach to help them make decision or buy a product. However, the benefits of advertisement pale into insignificance when set against drawbacks. In my opinion, advertisement always exaggerate and optimize the product in order to increase sales. It is common that companies would utilize manipulative tactics to induce potential consumers' purchasing behavior, which keeps them from thinking in a rational way. Instead, they make buying choice by emotional response. For example, vacuum cleaner always attract individuals by compelling visual evidence. The company generally advertiseadvertises(The dog always bark(s) at me) that it could tackle stubborn stains, like grease and leftovers. What’s more,

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

While advertisements can indeed provide valuable information to assist consumers in making informed decisions, their potential drawbacks cannot be overlooked. In my view, advertisements often exaggerate and embellish product features to boost sales, employing manipulative tactics that target potential consumers' emotions rather than rational thinking. Consequently, individuals may make impulsive purchases based on emotional responses rather than objective evaluations. For instance, vacuum cleaner advertisements frequently captivate audiences with persuasive visual demonstrations, claiming the ability to tackle stubborn stains such as grease and residue. However, the reality may not always align with these lofty promises. (99 words)

Admittedly, Revised essay: Section Title: 7 Article Corrections

Although it is undeniable true that ads. could be advertisements can serve as a comprehensive approach to help them make decision guide for consumers in making decisions or buy a product. However, the benefits of advertisement pale into insignificance when set against drawbacks. purchasing products, their drawbacks must also be considered. In my opinion, advertisement always advertisements often exaggerate and optimize enhance product features with the product in order to increase goal of increasing sales. It is common that not uncommon for companies would utilize to use manipulative tactics to induce influence potential consumers' buying behavior, steering them away from rational thinking and towards emotional responses. As a result, people may make purchasing behavior, which keeps them from thinking in a rational way. Instead, they make buying choice by emotional response. choices based on their emotions rather than objective evaluations. For example, vacuum cleaner always attract ads frequently entice individuals by with compelling visual evidence. The company generally advertise evidence, typically claiming that it could tackle the product can effectively remove stubborn stains, stains like grease and leftovers. What’s more,However, these advertised claims may not always reflect the true capabilities of the product.

8 思维导图


1. Introduction
   - Advertisements: valuable information vs. drawbacks

2. Exaggeration and embellishment
   - Boost sales
   - Manipulative tactics

3. Targeting emotions
   - Emotional responses vs. rational thinking

4. Impulsive purchases
   - Consequences of emotional decision-making

5. Example: vacuum cleaner advertisements
   - Persuasive visual demonstrations
   - Reality vs. promises

6. Conclusion 
   - Balancing information and skepticism in advertisements 

9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish definitionSimplified Chinese translationSample sentences
advertisement/ˌædvərˈtaɪzmənt/nounA notice or announcement promoting a product广告Advertisements often exaggerate the benefits of their products to attract customers.
exaggerate/ɪɡˈzædʒəreɪt/verbTo represent something as being larger or greater than it actually is夸大The advertisement exaggerated the vacuum cleaner's ability to remove stubborn stains.
embellish/ɪmˈbɛlɪʃ/verbTo make something more attractive by adding decorative details美化The company embellished the product's features in the advertisement to make it more appealing.
manipulative/məˈnɪpjələtɪv/adjectiveInfluencing or attempting to influence someone's behavior or perceptions操控性的The advertisement used manipulative tactics to evoke an emotional response from viewers.
impulsive/ɪmˈpʌlsɪv/adjectiveActing or done without forethought, often with negative consequences冲动的Impulsive purchases can lead to financial problems and dissatisfaction with the product.
rational/ˈræʃənl/adjectiveBased on or in accordance with reason or logic理性的It is important to make rational decisions when purchasing products, rather than being swayed by emotions.
vacuum cleaner/ˈvækjum ˈklinər/nounAn electrical appliance that cleans surfaces by suction吸尘器The vacuum cleaner advertisement claimed it could remove even the most stubborn stains.
persuasive/pərˈsweɪsɪv/adjectiveAble to convince someone to believe or do something有说服力的The persuasive visual demonstration in the advertisement made the product seem more effective than it was.
reality/riˈælɪti/nounThe state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear现实The reality of the product's performance did not live up to the promises made in the advertisement.
skepticism/ˈskɛptɪsɪzəm/nounDoubt as to the truth of something; critical questioning怀疑主义Consumers should maintain a healthy level of skepticism when evaluating the claims made in advertisements.
3

Bài Mẫu Của Người Dùng #3

From my perspective, I agree with Brad's view, advertising can help people make better choose. And people can watch a lot of advertisements to compare...

Điểm Số
22

Bài Mẫu Của Người Dùng

From my perspective, I agree with Brad's view, advertising can help people make better choose. And people can watch a lot of advertisements to compare different products. And when some new stores open,company will uus commercial stratages to help them better sale goods. So people can spend less money to buy high quality products. However, I disagree with ‘s opinion, because she ignores that a lot of information in the world is wrong, and some information is deliberately exaggerated in order to get others to watch. And if a company want to sale computer or smart phones to other, starting company need to ensure the quality of goods. Otherwise people don’t to spend money to buy it.

Kết Quả Đánh Giá

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.0

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5

  • Language Use and Grammar: 3.0

2. 预估分数

22. 3 任务完成度

从任务完成度的角度来看,这篇文章基本上回答了问题,并表达了个人观点。但是,文章中的一些句子表达不够清晰,有些语法错误。建议在细节和例子方面加强论述,使观点更具说服力。同时注意提高英语语法和词汇的准确性。

示例1(改进前):And people can watch a lot of advertisements to compare different products. 示例1(改进后):People can view various advertisements to compare different products, which helps them make informed decisions.

示例2(改进前):However, I disagree with ‘s opinion, because she ignores that a lot of information in the world is wrong... 示例2(改进后):However, I disagree with Karen's opinion because she overlooks the fact that there is a significant amount of misinformation in the world...

4. 文章结构与组织

从文章结构和组织的角度来看,这篇文章的结构不够清晰。建议在开头部分明确地陈述自己的观点,并在正文部分逐一阐述支持观点的理由和论据。最后,在结尾部分总结全文内容。此外,注意在段落之间使用恰当的过渡词或短语,使文章更具连贯性。

示例1(改进前):From my perspective, I agree with Brad's view, advertising can help people make better choose. 示例1(改进后):In my opinion, I agree with Brad that advertising plays a crucial role in helping people make better choices.

示例2(改进前):And when some new stores open,company will uus commercial stratages to help them better sale goods. 示例2(改进后):Moreover, when new stores open, companies use various marketing strategies to promote their products and attract customers.

5. 语法批改

From my perspective, I agree with Brad's view, advertising can help people make bettera better(This rule identifies whether the article 'a' is missing in a sentence.) choose. And people can watch a lot of advertisements to compare different products. And when some new stores open,company[No Replacement Word Found](misspelling) will uusUUS(misspelling) commercial stratagesstratagem(misspelling) to help them better sale goods. So people can spend less money to buy high quality products. However, I disagree with [No Replacement Word Found](Unpaired braces, brackets, quotation marks and similar symbols)s opinion, because she ignores that a lot of information in the world is wrong, and some information is deliberately exaggerated in order to get others to watch. And if a company wantwants(punctuation + singular noun + plural verb) to sale[No Replacement Word Found](unexpected noun after 'to') computer or smart phonessmartphones(Recommended compounds (smartphone, website, …)) to other, starting company need to ensure the quality of goods. OtherwiseOtherwise,(Commas after conjunctive/linking adverbs in front of a new sentence.) people don’t to spend money to buy it.

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

In my opinion, I concur with Brad's perspective that advertising can indeed assist individuals in making well-informed decisions. By examining various advertisements, consumers can compare different products and make better choices. For instance, when new stores launch, they often employ marketing strategies to promote their merchandise effectively, allowing customers to purchase high-quality items at lower prices. However, I must disagree with Karen's viewpoint as it overlooks the fact that misinformation is prevalent in today's world. Some advertisements may contain exaggerated claims to attract attention. It is crucial for companies selling products like computers or smartphones to ensure the quality of their offerings; otherwise, consumers will be hesitant to invest in them. (116 words)

From In my perspective, opinion, I agree concur with Brad's view, perspective (rephrased for better flow and clarity) that advertising can help people indeed assist individuals (changed "people" to "individuals" for variety) in making well-informed decisions (rephrased "better choose" to make better choose. And people it grammatically correct). By examining various advertisements, consumers can watch a lot of advertisements to compare different products. And products and make better choices (combined two sentences for better flow). For instance, when some new stores open,company will uus commercial stratages to help them better sale goods. So people can spend less money to buy high quality products. launch, they often employ marketing strategies (rephrased "commercial stratages" for proper spelling and clarity) to promote their merchandise effectively, allowing customers to purchase high-quality items at lower prices (rephrased for better flow and clarity). However, I must disagree with ‘s opinion, because she ignores Karen's viewpoint (added Karen's name for context) as it overlooks the fact that a lot of information misinformation is prevalent in the today's world (rephrased for better flow and clarity). Some advertisements may contain exaggerated claims to attract attention (rephrased for better flow and clarity). It is wrong, and some information is deliberately exaggerated in order to get others to watch. And if a company want to sale computer crucial for companies selling products like computers or smart phones to other, starting company need smartphones to ensure the quality of goods. Otherwise people don’t to spend money to buy it.their offerings; otherwise, consumers will be hesitant to invest in them (rephrased for better flow and clarity).

8 思维导图


- 主题: 广告对消费者的影响
  - 支持观点: 帮助消费者做出明智决策
    - 比较不同产品
    - 新店开张促销活动
    - 高质量商品降价销售
  - 反对观点: 广告中的误导信息
    - 夸大宣传
    - 质量问题
    - 消费者犹豫购买

9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish definitionSimplified Chinese translationSample sentences
perspective/pərˈspektɪv/nouna particular way of considering something观点I concur with Brad's perspective that advertising can assist individuals in making well-informed decisions.
advertisement/ədˈvɜrtɪsmənt/nouna notice or announcement promoting a product or service广告By examining various advertisements, consumers can compare different products and make better choices.
merchandise/ˈmɜrʧəndaɪz/noun/goods to be bought and sold/商品/When new stores launch, they often employ marketing strategies to promote their merchandise effectively.
misinformation/ˌmɪsɪnfərˈmeʃən/noun/false or inaccurate information/误导信息/However, I must disagree with Karen's viewpoint as it overlooks the fact that misinformation is prevalent in today's world.
exaggerated/ɪɡˈzæʤəreɪtəd/adjective/made to seem larger, better, or more important than it is/夸大的/Some advertisements may contain exaggerated claims to attract attention.
ensure/ɪnˈʃʊr/verb/to make certain that something will happen/确保/It is crucial for companies selling products like computers or smartphones to ensure the quality of their offerings; otherwise, consumers will be hesitant to invest in them.
prevalent/ˈprɛvələnt/adjectivewidespread in a particular area at a particular time普遍的Misinformation is prevalent in today's world.
quality/ˈkwɒlɪti/nounthe standard of something as measured against others质量Companies should ensure the quality of their products.
hesitant/ˈhɛzɪtənt/adjectivetentative, unsure, or slow in acting or speaking犹豫的Consumers will be hesitant to invest in products with exaggerated claims.
invest/ɪnˈvɛst/_verb_to put money into something hoping for a profit_投资

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Nhiệm vụ TOEFL Academic Discussion là gì?
Nhiệm vụ TOEFL Academic Discussion yêu cầu bạn đóng góp vào một cuộc thảo luận lớp học trực tuyến. Bạn sẽ đọc câu hỏi của giáo sư và các câu trả lời của những sinh viên khác, sau đó viết bài của riêng mình để trình bày và bảo vệ quan điểm trong khoảng 10 phút.
Nhiệm vụ Academic Discussion được chấm điểm như thế nào?
Nhiệm vụ này được chấm theo thang điểm từ 0-5 dựa trên mức độ liên quan đến chủ đề thảo luận, chất lượng sử dụng ngôn ngữ (ngữ pháp, từ vựng, cấu trúc câu), và mức độ bạn phát triển và hỗ trợ ý tưởng của mình bằng các ví dụ cụ thể và lập luận.
Các mẫu bài của người dùng trên trang này là gì?
Đây là những câu trả lời thực tế được gửi bởi các thí sinh TOEFL đã luyện tập câu hỏi này trên LingoLeap. Mỗi bài mẫu đã được đánh giá bởi công cụ chấm điểm AI của chúng tôi, cung cấp điểm số và phản hồi chi tiết về điểm mạnh cũng như những phần cần cải thiện.
Đánh giá của AI chính xác đến mức nào?
Công cụ đánh giá AI của LingoLeap được huấn luyện dựa trên tiêu chí chấm điểm chính thức của ETS và được hiệu chỉnh theo điểm số của giám khảo con người. Mặc dù không có hệ thống tự động nào là hoàn hảo, nó cung cấp phản hồi đáng tin cậy cho mục đích luyện tập và giúp xác định những phần cụ thể cần cải thiện.
Làm thế nào để tôi luyện tập nhiệm vụ Academic Discussion này?
Bạn có thể luyện tập bằng cách đăng ký một tài khoản LingoLeap miễn phí. Viết câu trả lời của riêng bạn cho đúng câu hỏi này, gửi bài, và nhận đánh giá AI tức thì cùng phản hồi chi tiết về bài viết của bạn.
Câu trả lời Academic Discussion của tôi nên dài bao nhiêu?
Hãy đặt mục tiêu khoảng 120-150 từ. Nhiệm vụ này cho bạn 10 phút để viết câu trả lời. Hãy tập trung vào sự rõ ràng, hỗ trợ quan điểm của bạn bằng các ví dụ cụ thể, và tham chiếu đến bối cảnh thảo luận thay vì viết một câu trả lời dài hơn.

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