TOEFL TPO 8 Academic Discussion Writing Sample: Your professor is teaching a class on economics. Write a post responding to the professor’s question.
إجابات حقيقية من المستخدمين مع تقييم وملاحظات مدعومة بالذكاء الاصطناعي
يتوفر 378 نموذج مُقدَّم من المستخدمين
ابدأ التدريب المجانينظرة عامة على المهمة
Doctor Achebe
In 1930, a famous economist predicted that at the end of the twentieth century, an average worker would work only 15 hours a week, thanks to advances in technology. This did not happen, as we all know. Nonetheless, the balance between work time and free time remains an interesting question. So, let me ask you today: Twenty years in the future, will people have more leisure time (free time) and less work than they have today? Why, or why not?
Claire
I think it is likely that people will work shorter hours in twenty years than they do today. Our societies are becoming wealthier all the time. It does not seem necessary for people to continue working as hard as they do today. At some point, having more free time should be more important than creating more wealth.
Paul
I am not sure people will work less in the future. As Doctor Achebe wrote, a shortening of the workweek was predicted before. There are many factors that determine how long people work. Our economic system is very competitive. Workers are pushed to work longer and longer hours so that companies have a competitive advantage.
نماذج المستخدمين ونتائج التقييم
Opens the writing question list in the LingoLeap app, not this exact question. Practising needs a free account. AI scoring uses credits, except 3 free scores a day on Practice Test 1 (PQ26-1) questions.
1نموذج مستخدم #1
While Paul presents a compelling counterargument regarding the decline of working time, asserting that workers are expected to strive longer in concer...
نموذج مستخدم #1
While Paul presents a compelling counterargument regarding the decline of working time, asserting that workers are expected to strive longer in concer...
نموذج مستخدم
While Paul presents a compelling counterargument regarding the decline of working time, asserting that workers are expected to strive longer in concerning of the extremely competitive market, I believe that declining working hours are destined. Although corporation requires more enormous prolificacy, extending working hours will lower their working satisfaction and therefore reduce their working motivation and efficiency. Consequently, the implementation of this option will not only increase the expenses spent on the labor force but also decrease the overall competitive abilities in the market, outweighing the potential benefits offered by extended working hours. Furthermore, with the rapid development of artificial intelligence, AI may be able to solve the complex issues that were previously handled by humans with fewer or even no extra and unnecessary expenses. Additionally, reducing the working hours enables employees to increase their human capital by leveraging resources available to perfectly engage in this contemporary and technologically advanced society. Therefore, both employers and employees can benefit substantially from the advantages offered by declining working hours.
نتيجة التقييم
1. Sub Scores
-
Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 5
-
Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.5
-
Language Use and Grammar: 4.5
2. Estimated Scores
Estimated Score: 28
3. Task completeness
The essay effectively addresses the task requirements by expressing a clear opinion, supporting it with relevant arguments, and contributing to the discussion in a unique way. However, there is room for improvement in terms of elaborating on some points and providing more specific examples to strengthen the argument.
Example 1: Original: "Furthermore, with the rapid development of artificial intelligence, AI may be able to solve the complex issues that were previously handled by humans with fewer or even no extra and unnecessary expenses." Improved: "Furthermore, with the rapid development of artificial intelligence, AI may be able to solve complex issues such as data analysis or customer service tasks that were previously handled by humans, thus reducing labor costs and allowing companies to shorten working hours."
Example 2: Original: "Additionally, reducing the working hours enables employees to increase their human capital by leveraging resources available to perfectly engage in this contemporary and technologically advanced society." Improved: "Additionally, reducing working hours enables employees to invest more time in professional development opportunities such as online courses or workshops, thereby increasing their human capital and contributing positively to both their personal growth and company success."
4. Essay structure and organization
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs presenting different arguments, and a conclusion. The organization is mostly logical; however, some transitions between ideas could be improved for better flow.
Example 1: Original: "Although corporation requires more enormous prolificacy..." Improved: "Although corporations require increased productivity..."
Example 2: Original: "Therefore, both employers and employees can benefit substantially from the advantages offered by declining working hours." Improved: "In conclusion, both employers and employees stand to benefit substantially from the advantages offered by declining working hours, as it can lead to increased efficiency, cost savings, and improved human capital."
5. Grammar
While Paul presents a compelling counterargumentcounter-argument regarding the decline of working time,hours, asserting that workers are expected to strive longer in concerningthe face of the extremely competitive market, I believe that declining working hours are destined. Although corporation requires more enormous prolificacy,corporations require greater productivity, extending working hours will lower their working satisfaction and therefore reduce their working motivation and efficiency. Consequently, the implementation of this option will not only increase the expenses spent on the labor force but also decrease the overall competitive abilities in the market, outweighing the potential benefits offered by extended working hours. Furthermore, with the rapid development of artificial intelligence, AI may be able to solve the complex issues that were previously handled by humans with fewer or even no extra and unnecessary expenses. Additionally, reducing the working hours enables employees to increase their human capital by leveraging resources available to perfectly engage in this contemporary and technologically advanced society. Therefore, both employers and employees can benefit substantially from the advantages offered by declining working hours.
Display title: 6 Revised Essay
While Paul presents a compelling counterargument regarding the decline of working time, asserting that workers are expected to strive longer in light of the highly competitive market, I believe that a reduction in working hours is inevitable. Although companies demand increased productivity, extending working hours may lower employee satisfaction and consequently reduce their motivation and efficiency. As a result, this approach could not only increase labor costs but also diminish overall competitiveness in the market, outweighing the potential benefits offered by extended working hours. Furthermore, with the rapid development of artificial intelligence, AI may be able to address complex issues previously handled by humans with fewer or even no additional expenses. Additionally, reducing working hours enables employees to enhance their human capital by leveraging resources available to effectively engage in this modern and technologically advanced society. Therefore, both employers and employees can substantially benefit from the advantages offered by declining working hours. (157 words)
While Paul presents a compelling counterargument regarding the decline of working time, time (changed "time" to "hours" for consistency), asserting that workers are expected to strive longer in concerning light of the extremely highly competitive market, market (rephrased for clarity and natural tone), I believe that declining a reduction in working hours are destined. is inevitable. Although corporation companies demand increased productivity (changed "corporation requires more enormous prolificacy, prolificacy" to improve clarity and natural tone), extending working hours will may lower their working employee satisfaction and therefore consequently reduce their working motivation and efficiency. Consequently, the implementation of As a result, this option will approach could not only increase the expenses spent on the labor force costs (rephrased for clarity) but also decrease the diminish overall competitive abilities competitiveness in the market, outweighing the potential benefits offered by extended working hours. Furthermore, with the rapid development of artificial intelligence, AI may be able to solve the address complex issues that were previously handled by humans with fewer or even no extra and unnecessary expenses. additional expenses (rephrased for clarity and natural tone). Additionally, reducing the working hours enables employees to increase enhance their human capital by leveraging resources available to perfectly effectively engage in this contemporary modern and technologically advanced society. society (rephrased for clarity and natural tone). Therefore, both employers and employees can substantially benefit substantially from the advantages offered by declining working hours.
Display title: 8 Mind Map
1. Introduction
- Counterargument
- Reduction in working hours
2. Employee satisfaction
- Lower motivation and efficiency
- Increased labor costs
3. Competitiveness in the market
- Diminished overall competitiveness
4. Artificial intelligence (AI)
- Address complex issues
- Fewer expenses
5. Enhancing human capital
- Leveraging resources effectively
6. Modern and technologically advanced society
7. Benefits for employers and employees
8. Conclusion
Display title: 9 Key Words
| Word | Phonetic Symbol | Part of Speech | English Definition | English Translation | Sample Sentence |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Counterargument | /ˈkaʊntərˌɑːrɡjʊmənt/ | Noun | An argument or set of reasons put forward to oppose an idea or theory developed in another argument. | Counterargument | Paul presents a compelling counterargument regarding the decline of working time. |
| Inevitable | /ɪˈnɛvɪtəbəl/ | Adjective | Certain to happen; unavoidable | Inevitable | I believe that a reduction in working hours is inevitable. |
| Competitiveness | /kəmˈpɛtɪtɪvnəs/ | Noun | The ability of a firm or nation to offer products and services that meet the quality standards of the local and world markets. | Competitiveness | This approach could diminish overall competitiveness in the market. |
| Artificial Intelligence (AI) | /ˌɑrtəˈfɪʃəl ɪnˈtɛlɪdʒəns/ | Noun | The theory and development of computer systems able to perform tasks that normally require human intelligence. | Artificial Intelligence | With the rapid development of artificial intelligence, AI may be able to address complex issues. |
| Expenses | /ɪkˈspɛnsɪz/ | Noun | The cost required for something; the money spent on something | Expenses | AI may be able to address complex issues with fewer or even no additional expenses. |
| Leveraging | /ˈliːvərɪdʒɪŋ/ | Verb | Use (something) to maximum advantage | Leveraging | Reducing working hours enables employees to enhance their human capital by leveraging resources. |
| Human Capital | /ˈhjumən ˈkæpɪtl/ | Noun | The skills, knowledge, and experience possessed by an individual or population | Human Capital | Enhancing human capital is essential for both employers and employees. |
| Technologically advanced | /tɛknəˈlɒdʒɪkli ədˈvænst/ | Adjective | Having or involving new and advanced technology | Technologically advanced | We live in a modern and technologically advanced society. |
| Declining | /dɪˈklaɪnɪŋ/ | Verb | Gradually decrease in importance, value, quality, or intensity | _Declining | _Both employers and employees can benefit from the advantages offered by declining working hours. |
2نموذج مستخدم #2
From my perspective, I hold the view that people will work more in the future. Tough technology developing future, this improvement can do little diff...
الدرجة22
نموذج مستخدم #2
From my perspective, I hold the view that people will work more in the future. Tough technology developing future, this improvement can do little diff...
نموذج مستخدم
From my perspective, I hold the view that people will work more in the future. Tough technology developing future, this improvement can do little difference to poeple's wroking load as people dreamed in 1930 and even make it worse. In the past, there are many works shoule people devote in, which greatly contribute to lift the employment rate.However, as technology advanced, almost all of these jobs are took place by robots and machines. Why? For these 'workers' need no rest, salary. Consequently, people shoule work harder and overtime to survive. Moreover, AI progress fastly. Nowadays, they can adress professional problems better than people, and have no uppper limitition. These fruits of people's intelligence perform at a higher level than people themselves. To live better, people should be more diligent. As a result, the dream of working less will fall down again. Through perfecting the legal system, it may really benefit people.
نتيجة التقييم
1. 子项得分
Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.0 Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5 Language Use and Grammar: 3.0
2. 预估分数
22. 3 任务完成度
你的文章基本上回答了问题,但是在支持观点和语言使用方面还有待提高。首先,在论述为什么未来人们会工作更多时,你提到了技术发展和人工智能的影响,但没有详细说明这些因素如何导致人们工作时间增加。其次,在语言使用方面,有一些语法错误和表达不清晰的地方。
改进建议:
-
在论述观点时,尝试提供更具体的例子或详细解释。
-
注意检查语法错误,并确保表达清晰。
示例:
-
"However, as technology advanced, almost all of these jobs are took place by robots and machines." 改为 "However, as technology advanced, many of these jobs have been replaced by robots and machines."
-
"These fruits of people's intelligence perform at a higher level than people themselves." 改为 "These products of human intelligence often perform at a higher level than humans themselves."
4. 文章结构与组织
文章的结构基本合理,包括引言、正文和结论。然而,在段落组织和过渡方面还有改进空间。每个段落应集中讨论一个具体观点,并提供支持细节。同时,需要在段落之间加入明确的过渡。
改进建议:
-
在段落之间加入过渡句,使文章更连贯。
-
确保每个段落都有一个明确的主题句和支持细节。
示例:
-
在第二段和第三段之间加入过渡句,如:"In addition to the impact of technology on jobs, the rapid development of artificial intelligence also plays a role in increasing work hours."
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在第三段开头加入主题句,如:"Another factor contributing to longer working hours is the advancement of artificial intelligence."
5. Grammar
From my perspective, I hold the view that people will work more in the future. Tough technology developing future, this improvement can do little difference to poeplepeople(misspelling)'s wrokingworking(misspelling) load as people dreamed in 1930 and even make it worse. In the past, there are many works shouleshould(misspelling) people devote in, which greatly contribute to lift the employment rate.However However(Missing space between sentences), as technology advanced, almost all of these jobs are tooktaken(Agreement: 'been' or 'was' + past tense) place by robots and machines. Why? For these 'workers' need no rest, salary. Consequently, people shouleshould(misspelling) work harder and overtime to survive.
Moreover, AI progress fastlyquickly(fastly (quickly)). Nowadays, they can adressaddress(misspelling) professional problems better than people, and have no uppperupper(misspelling) limititionlimitation(misspelling). These fruits of people's intelligence perform at a higher level than people themselves. To live better, people should be more diligent.
As a result, the dream of working less will fall down again. Through perfecting the legal system, it may really benefit people.
Title: 6 文章修订
In my opinion, it is more likely that people will work longer hours in the future. Although technological advancements have the potential to reduce workloads, as optimistically predicted in 1930, they may conversely contribute to increased work demands. In the past, numerous jobs required human labor, which significantly boosted employment rates. However, with the advent of technology, many of these positions have been replaced by robots and machines that do not require rest or compensation. As a result, individuals must work harder and longer to remain competitive in the job market.
Furthermore, rapid advancements in artificial intelligence (AI) have led to machines capable of solving complex professional problems more efficiently than humans and without any upper limitations. These creations of human ingenuity often outperform their creators, necessitating greater diligence from people who wish to improve their lives.
Consequently, the dream of reduced working hours may once again prove elusive. However, through the refinement of legal systems and labor policies, it is possible that technological advancements could eventually be harnessed for the benefit of society as a whole. (180 words)
From In my perspective, I hold the view opinion, it is more likely that people will work more in the future. Tough technology developing future, this improvement can do little difference to poeple's wroking load as people dreamed in 1930 and even longer hours in the future (clarified the statement to make it worse. more concise). Although technological advancements have the potential to reduce workloads (corrected "technology developing future" to "technological advancements"), as optimistically predicted in 1930, they may conversely contribute to increased work demands. In the past, there are numerous jobs required human labor (rephrased for clarity), which significantly boosted employment rates. However, with the advent of technology (corrected "as technology advanced" to "with the advent of technology"), many works shoule people devote in, which greatly contribute to lift the employment rate.However, as technology advanced, almost all of these jobs are took place positions have been replaced by robots and machines. Why? For these 'workers' need no rest, salary. Consequently, people shoule work harder and overtime to survive. ¶ Moreover, AI progress fastly. Nowadays, they can adress professional problems better than people, and have no uppper limitition. These fruits of people's intelligence perform at a higher level than people themselves. To live better, people should be more diligent. ¶ machines that do not require rest or compensation (rephrased for clarity and corrected grammar). As a result, individuals must work harder and longer to remain competitive in the job market.
Furthermore, rapid advancements in artificial intelligence (AI) have led to machines capable of solving complex professional problems more efficiently than humans and without any upper limitations (rephrased for clarity and corrected grammar). These creations of human ingenuity often outperform their creators, necessitating greater diligence from people who wish to improve their lives.
Consequently, the dream of reduced working less will fall down again. Through perfecting the hours may once again prove elusive (rephrased for clarity). However, through the refinement of legal system, systems and labor policies (corrected "perfecting the legal system" to "refinement of legal systems and labor policies"), it may really is possible that technological advancements could eventually be harnessed for the benefit people.of society as a whole.
8 思维导图
1. Introduction
- Future work hours
- Technological advancements
2. Past work environment
- Human labor
- Employment rates
3. Technology replacing jobs
- Robots and machines
- Competitive job market
4. Artificial intelligence (AI)
- Solving complex problems
- Outperforming humans
5. Increased work demands
- Remaining competitive
- Improving lives
6. Elusive dream of reduced working hours
7. Legal systems and labor policies
8. Harnessing technology for societal benefit
9 关键词
| Word | Phonetic Symbol | Part of Speech | English Definition | Simplified Chinese Translation | Sample Sentence |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Technological advancements | /ˌtɛknəˈlɒdʒɪkəl ədˈvænsmənts/ | Noun phrase | Progress in technology | 技术进步 | Technological advancements have the potential to reduce workloads. |
| Employment rates | /ɪmˈplɔɪmənt reɪts/ | Noun phrase | The percentage of people who are employed in a population | 就业率 | In the past, numerous jobs required human labor, which significantly boosted employment rates. |
| Artificial intelligence (AI) | /ɑrˌtɪfɪʃəl ɪnˈtɛlədʒəns/ | Noun phrase | The development of computer systems that can perform tasks that normally require human intelligence, such as visual perception, speech recognition, decision-making, and translation between languages. | 人工智能(AI) | Rapid advancements in artificial intelligence (AI) have led to machines capable of solving complex professional problems. |
| Competitive job market | /kəmˈpɛtɪtɪv dʒɒb ˈmɑrkɪt/ | Noun phrase | A job market where there is strong competition for jobs | 竞争激烈的就业市场 | As a result, individuals must work harder and longer to remain competitive in the job market. |
| Outperform | /aʊtpərˈfɔrm/ | Verb | To perform better than someone or something else | 胜过,优于 | These creations of human ingenuity often outperform their creators. |
| Diligence | /ˈdɪlədʒəns/ | Noun | Careful and persistent work or effort | 勤奋,用功 | Necessitating greater diligence from people who wish to improve their lives. |
| Elusive | /ɪˈluːsɪv/ | Adjective | Difficult to find, catch, or achieve; difficult to remember or recall. | 难以捉摸的,难以实现的,难以回忆起的 | The dream of reduced working hours may once again prove elusive. |
| Refinement | /rɪˈfaɪnmənt/ | Noun | The process of improving something by making small changes; the act of refining something. | 改进,提炼,精炼 | Through the refinement of legal systems and labor policies, it is possible that technological advancements could eventually be harnessed for the benefit of society as a whole. |
| Harness | /ˈhærnɪs/ | Verb | To control and make use of something, especially to produce energy or power | 利用,驾驭 | It is possible that technological advancements could eventually be harnessed for the benefit of society as a whole. |
3نموذج مستخدم #3
In my opinion, workers will work more time in the future.
Firstly, the number of population is continuously decreasing in most countries of the worl...
نموذج مستخدم #3
In my opinion, workers will work more time in the future. Firstly, the number of population is continuously decreasing in most countries of the worl...
نموذج مستخدم
In my opinion, workers will work more time in the future. Firstly, the number of population is continuously decreasing in most countries of the world, meaning that less new workers will have to support those retiring from work. The situation will place excessive pressure on the pension system, and consequently, new generation of employees may have to spend more time in working. Secondly, with more advanced economy comes more desire for better life, and workers may pursue supriority over others by dedicating more of their life to make more money. While Claire raises a valid argument by stating that people will work less due to how wealthy the society will be, I believe that some people will require for more because this abide by the human nature. Also, I concur with Paul on his concern about the increasing intensity of competition leading people to work more.
نتيجة التقييم
1. Sub Scores
Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5 Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0 Language Use and Grammar: 4.0
2. Estimated Scores
Estimated Score: 27
3. Task completeness
The essay does a good job of addressing the specific requirements of the task. The writer expresses their opinion, supports it with relevant arguments, and contributes to the discussion by engaging with the viewpoints of Claire and Paul. However, there is room for improvement in elaborating on the viewpoint and providing more specific examples or details to strengthen the argument.
Example 1: Instead of saying "the number of population is continuously decreasing," provide a specific example or statistic to support this claim.
Example 2: When discussing how workers may pursue superiority over others, consider giving an example from a particular industry or job role to illustrate this point more clearly.
4. Essay structure and organization
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a specific point, and supporting details are provided. However, transitions between ideas could be improved for better coherence.
Suggestion 1: Use transitional phrases such as "Furthermore," "On the other hand," or "In addition" to create smoother connections between ideas within paragraphs.
Suggestion 2: Consider reorganizing the essay so that each paragraph focuses on one main idea with supporting details, rather than mixing multiple points within one paragraph.
Example 1: Instead of combining both reasons for increased work hours in one paragraph, create separate paragraphs for each reason (population decrease and desire for superiority) with appropriate transitions between them.
Example 2: When discussing Claire's argument in the conclusion, use a transition like "While Claire raises a valid argument..." instead of starting directly with her name. This will help guide readers through your thought process more effectively.
5. Grammar
In my opinion, workers will work more time in the future.
Firstly, the number of population is continuously decreasing in most countries of the world, meaning that less new workers will have to support those retiring from work. The situation will place excessive pressure on the pension system, and consequently, new generation of employees may have to spend more time in working. Secondly, with more advanced economy comes more desire for better life, and workers may pursue suprioritysuperiority(misspelling) over others by dedicating more of their life to make more money.
While Claire raises a valid argument by stating that people will work less due to how wealthy the society will be, I believe that some people will require for more because this abideabides(Plural verb after 'this' or 'that') by the human nature. Also, I concur with Paul on his concern about the increasing intensity of competition leading people to work more.
Display title: 6 Revised Essay
In my opinion, workers will likely work more hours in the future.
Firstly, the population is continuously decreasing in most countries worldwide, meaning that fewer new workers will have to support those retiring from work. This situation will place excessive pressure on the pension system, and consequently, the new generation of employees may have to spend more time working. Secondly, with a more advanced economy comes a greater desire for a better life, and workers may pursue superiority over others by dedicating more of their lives to earning money.
While Claire raises a valid argument by stating that people will work less due to society's increasing wealth, I believe that some individuals will strive for more because it aligns with human nature. Additionally, I concur with Paul on his concern about the escalating intensity of competition leading people to work longer hours. (147 words)
In my opinion, workers will likely work more time hours in the future. future (revised "more time" to "more hours" for clarity and specificity).
Firstly, the number of population is continuously decreasing in most countries of the world, worldwide (revised "of the world" to "worldwide" for conciseness), meaning that less fewer new workers (changed "less" to "fewer" for grammatical correctness) will have to support those retiring from work. The This situation will place excessive pressure on the pension system, and consequently, the new generation of employees may have to spend more time in working. working (revised "in working" to "working" for natural tone). Secondly, with a more advanced economy comes more a greater desire for a better life, life (revised "more desire for better life" to "greater desire for a better life" for natural tone), and workers may pursue supriority superiority over others by dedicating more of their life to make more money. lives (changed "life" to "lives" for plural agreement) to earning money (revised "make more money" to "earning money" for natural tone).
While Claire raises a valid argument by stating that people will work less due to how wealthy the society will be, society's increasing wealth (revised phrasing for clarity and natural tone), I believe that some people will require individuals will strive for more because this abide by the it aligns with human nature. Also, nature (revised phrasing for clarity and natural tone). Additionally, I concur with Paul on his concern about the increasing escalating intensity of competition leading people to work more.longer hours (revised phrasing for clarity and natural tone).
8 Mind Map
-
Decreasing population
- Fewer new workers
- Support retirees
- Pressure on pension system
-
Advanced economy
- Desire for better life
- Pursue superiority
- Dedication to earning money
-
Claire's argument: increasing wealth leads to less work
-
Human nature: striving for more despite wealth increase
-
Paul's concern: escalating competition leads to longer hours
9 Key Words
| Word | Phonetic Symbol | Part of Speech | English Definition | English Translation | Sample Sentences |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Decreasing | /dɪˈkriːsɪŋ/ | adjective | Becoming smaller or fewer in size, amount, intensity, or degree | Becoming smaller or fewer in size, amount, intensity, or degree | The population is continuously decreasing in most countries worldwide. |
| Pension | /ˈpɛnʃən/ | noun | A regular payment made during a person's retirement from an investment fund | A regular payment made during a person's retirement from an investment fund | This situation will place excessive pressure on the pension system. |
| Superiority | /suːˌpɪəriˈɒrɪti/ | noun | The state of being superior; higher rank, status, or quality | The state of being superior; higher rank, status, or quality | Workers may pursue superiority over others by dedicating more of their lives to earning money. |
| Escalating | /ˈeskəleɪtɪŋ/ | adjective | Increasing rapidly | Increasing rapidly | Paul's concern about the escalating intensity of competition. |
| Intensity | /ɪnˈtensɪti/ | noun | The quality of being intense; extreme force, degree, or amount | The quality of being intense; extreme force, degree, or amount | The escalating intensity of competition leading people to work longer hours. |
| Concur | /kənˈkər/ | verb | To agree; to have the same opinion | To agree; to have the same opinion | I concur with Paul on his concern about the escalating intensity of competition. |
| Dedication | /ˌdɛdɪˈkeɪʃən/ | noun | The quality of being dedicated or committed to a task or purpose | The quality of being dedicated or committed to a task or purpose | Workers may show dedication to earning money by working more hours. |
| Strive | /straɪv/ | verb | To make great efforts to achieve or obtain something | To make great efforts to achieve or obtain something | Some individuals will strive for more because it aligns with human nature. |
| Advanced | /ədˈvænst/ | adjective | Far on in progress; at a higher level than others in skill, knowledge, or achievement | Far on in progress; at a higher level than others in skill, knowledge, or achievement | With a more advanced economy comes a greater desire for a better life. |
6 Revised Essay
In my opinion, workers will likely work more hours in the future.
Firstly, the population is continuously decreasing in most countries worldwide, meaning that fewer new workers will have to support those retiring from work. This situation will place excessive pressure on the pension system, and consequently, the new generation of employees may have to spend more time working. Secondly, with a more advanced economy comes a greater desire for a better life, and workers may pursue superiority over others by dedicating more of their lives to earning money.
While Claire raises a valid argument by stating that people will work less due to society's increasing wealth, I believe that some individuals will strive for more because it aligns with human nature. Additionally, I concur with Paul on his concern about the escalating intensity of competition leading people to work longer hours.
4نموذج مستخدم #4
In response to Doctor Achebe's qustion about leisure time in the future, I concur with the Paul's opinion that people will not work less in the future...
الدرجة22
نموذج مستخدم #4
In response to Doctor Achebe's qustion about leisure time in the future, I concur with the Paul's opinion that people will not work less in the future...
نموذج مستخدم
In response to Doctor Achebe's qustion about leisure time in the future, I concur with the Paul's opinion that people will not work less in the future as the development of technology devices need more people to repair. The technology advances rapidly, which means it will occur many robots to serve for people. The large extent of using robots caused them broken down frequently that they will need many people who specilizes in technology to repaire them. I recall a experience of using a robot at my home which often didn't work. Thus, I often called the technologists to repair it. Through this experience, we are able to inferr easily that many robots needed to repair in the future because of largely-scare use. This will cause people who work in this area will not have more to relax.
نتيجة التقييم
1.子项得分
Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.0 Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5 Language Use and Grammar: 3.0
2.预估分数
22. 3.任务完成度
这篇文章在回答问题时,表达了一个明确的观点,并提供了一些相关的论据。然而,有一些方面可以改进。首先,文章需要更多的具体例子和详细信息来支持观点。其次,在讨论技术发展对工作时间影响时,可以考虑其他因素,如经济、社会和政治因素。
改进建议示例:
-
"The technology advances rapidly, which means it will occur many robots to serve for people." 改为 "The rapid advancement of technology will lead to an increased use of robots in various industries, potentially reducing the need for human labor."
-
在文章中加入其他因素的讨论,例如:"In addition to technological advancements, factors such as economic growth, social policies, and changing work culture may also contribute to a potential decrease in work hours."
4.文章结构与组织
文章的结构和组织方面有待提高。虽然有简短的引言、主体和结论部分,但段落之间缺乏清晰的过渡。此外,主体段落应更加关注一个具体的观点,并提供支持细节。
改进建议示例:
-
在引言部分明确提出自己的观点,例如:"In my opinion, people will not necessarily work less in the future due to the increasing demand for technology specialists."
-
在主体段落中使用过渡词汇来连接不同的观点,例如:"On one hand, the rapid advancement of technology may lead to a decrease in work hours. On the other hand, factors such as economic growth and social policies could also play a role in determining future work hours."
- 语法批改
In response to Doctor Achebe's qustionquestion(misspelling) about leisure time in the future, I concur with the Paul's opinion that people will not work less in the future as the development of technology devices need more people to repair. The technology advances rapidly, which means it will occur many robots to serve for people. The large extent of using robots caused them broken down frequently that they will need many people who specilizesspecializes(misspelling) in technology to repairerepair(misspelling) them. I recall aan(Use of 'a' vs. 'an') experience of using a robot at my homehome,(This rule identifies whether commas are missing in a sentence.) which often didn't work. Thus, I often called the technologists to repair it. Through this experience, we are able to inferrinfer(misspelling) easily that many robots needed to repair in the future because of largely-scare use. This will cause people who work in this area will not have more to relax.
6.文章修订
In response to Doctor Achebe's question about leisure time in the future, I concur with Paul's opinion that people will not necessarily work less due to the increasing demand for technology specialists. The rapid advancement of technology will lead to an increased use of robots in various industries, potentially reducing the need for human labor. However, this also creates a demand for skilled technicians who can maintain and repair these machines.
Drawing from personal experience, I recall frequently encountering issues with a robot at my home, requiring the assistance of technologists to resolve the problem. This example illustrates that as robots become more prevalent in society, there will be a greater need for individuals specializing in their maintenance and repair. Consequently, those working in this field may not experience a reduction in work hours.
In addition to technological advancements, factors such as economic growth, social policies, and changing work culture may also contribute to a potential decrease or increase in work hours. Thus, it is essential to consider multiple aspects when predicting future trends in leisure time and work-life balance. (181 words)
7.文章批改
In response to Doctor Achebe's qustion question about leisure time in the future, I concur with the Paul's opinion that people will not necessarily work less due to the increasing demand for technology specialists. (Revised "not work less in the future as the development of technology devices need more people to repair. repair" for clarity and coherence.)
The rapid advancement of technology will lead to an increased use of robots in various industries, potentially reducing the need for human labor. (Revised "technology advances rapidly, which means it will occur many robots to serve for people. The large extent of using robots caused them broken down people" for improved grammar and vocabulary.)
However, this also creates a demand for skilled technicians who can maintain and repair these machines. (Added a sentence to connect ideas and improve cohesion.)
Drawing from personal experience, I recall frequently that they will need many people who specilizes in technology to repaire them. I encountering issues with a robot at my home, requiring the assistance of technologists to resolve the problem. (Revised "I recall a experience of using a robot at my home which often didn't work. Thus, I often called the technologists to repair it. Through work" for better grammar and vocabulary usage.)
This example illustrates that as robots become more prevalent in society, there will be a greater need for individuals specializing in their maintenance and repair. Consequently, those working in this field may not experience a reduction in work hours. (Revised "Through this experience, we are able to inferr easily that many robots needed to repair in the future because of largely-scare use. This use" for improved grammar and clarity.)
In addition to technological advancements, factors such as economic growth, social policies, and changing work culture may also contribute to a potential decrease or increase in work hours. (Added new ideas that contribute to the conversation while maintaining original paragraph structure.)
Thus, it is essential to consider multiple aspects when predicting future trends in leisure time and work-life balance. (Revised "This will cause people who work in this area will not have more to relax.relax" for better grammar and coherence.)
8.思维导图
-
Introduction
- Leisure time in the future
- Paul's opinion
-
Technology advancements
- Increased use of robots
- Reduced need for human labor
-
Demand for skilled technicians
- Maintenance and repair of robots
- Personal experience with a robot at home
-
Other factors affecting work hours
- Economic growth
- Social policies
- Changing work culture
-
Conclusion
- Importance of considering multiple aspects
9.关键词
| Word | Phonetic Symbol | Part of Speech | English definition | Simplified Chinese translation | Sample sentences |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| concur | /kənˈkɜr/ | verb | to agree | 同意 | I concur with Paul's opinion that people will not necessarily work less in the future. |
| prevalent | /ˈprɛvələnt/ | adjective | widespread; common | 普遍的 | As robots become more prevalent in society, there will be a greater need for maintenance specialists. |
| technologist | /tɛkˈnɒlədʒɪst/ | noun | /a person who specializes in technology | /技术专家 | /I had to call a technologist to fix the issues with my home robot. |
| maintenance | /ˈmeɪntənəns/ | /noun | /the process of preserving or repairing something | /维护,保养 | /Regular maintenance is essential for keeping machines running smoothly. |
| economic growth | /iːkəˈnɒmɪk ɡrəʊθ/ | noun | an increase in the production and consumption of goods and services | 经济增长 | Economic growth can have a significant impact on work hours and leisure time. |
| social policies | /ˈsəʊʃəl ˈpɒlɪsiz/ | noun | government policies that affect society and its well-being | 社会政策 | Social policies, such as parental leave, can influence work-life balance. |
| work culture | /wɜrk ˈkʌltʃər/ | /noun | /the values, beliefs, and attitudes that shape a workplace | /工作文化 | /A positive work culture can lead to increased job satisfaction and productivity. |
| coherence | /kəʊˈhɪərəns/ | /noun | /the quality of being logical and consistent | /连贯性 | /The revised essay has improved coherence, making it easier to understand. |
| cohesion | /kəʊˈhiːʒən/ | /noun | /the action or fact of forming a united whole | /凝聚力 | /Cohesion is essential for creating a well-structured essay with clear connections between ideas. |
| work-life balance | /wɜrk laɪf ˈbæləns/ | noun | the equilibrium between personal life and career demands | 工作与生活的平衡 | Achieving a healthy work-life balance is crucial for overall well-being. |
5نموذج مستخدم #5
While Paul raises a valid point that people will unavoidably work overtime in the future, he fails to predict the revolutionary effect caused by the c...
الدرجة27
نموذج مستخدم #5
While Paul raises a valid point that people will unavoidably work overtime in the future, he fails to predict the revolutionary effect caused by the c...
نموذج مستخدم
While Paul raises a valid point that people will unavoidably work overtime in the future, he fails to predict the revolutionary effect caused by the cutting-edge technology. Beyond overall improvement of society wealth, technology plays a pivotal role in future's workplace by serving and substituting most of individual's work assignments. Coding in front of the computer, giving fundamental history classes to students, and even serving as a well-experienced auditor, robots can perform numerous tasks without human's guidance and some of their work outcome exceeds human' s outcome. All human being has to do is to keep an eye on robots' work consciously and carefully, which is extremely time-saving compared with their work rhythm recently. Therefore, with advanced technology and rapid changing economy landscape, people will work less in the future.
نتيجة التقييم
1. 子项得分
-
Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5
-
Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0
-
Language Use and Grammar: 4.0
2. 预估分数
- 27
3. 任务完成度
这篇文章在回答问题时基本上完成了任务要求。然而,为了更好地支持观点,可以提供更多具体的例子和细节。此外,文章可以进一步讨论克莱尔的观点以及它与保罗的观点之间的关系。
改进建议示例:
-
在讨论技术如何影响未来工作时,可以提供具体的技术发展趋势或案例,例如人工智能、自动化等。
-
可以进一步阐述克莱尔观点中提到的社会财富增长对未来工作时间的影响,并与保罗的观点进行比较。
4. 文章结构与组织
文章结构清晰,包括引言、正文和结论。然而,在正文部分,可以通过使用主题句和段落间过渡词汇来增强段落之间的联系。
改进建议示例:
-
在第一个主体段落开头使用主题句:“尽管保罗认为竞争性经济可能导致人们在未来加班,但他没有考虑到技术进步对工作时间的影响。”
-
在段落之间使用过渡词汇,例如:“因此,在克莱尔的观点中,随着社会财富的增长和技术的发展,人们在未来可能会有更多的休闲时间。”
5. 语法批改
While Paul raises a valid point that people will unavoidably work overtime in the future, he fails to predict the revolutionary effect caused by the cutting-edge technology. Beyond overall improvement of society wealth, technology plays a pivotal role in future's workplace by serving and substituting most of individual's work assignments. Coding in front of the computer, giving fundamental history classes to students, and even serving as a well-experienced auditor, robots can perform numerous tasks without human's guidance and some of their work outcome exceeds human' shuman's(space after apostrophe in contraction (e.g. I' m)) outcome. All human being has to do is to keep an eye on robots' work consciously and carefully, which is extremely time-saving compared with their work rhythm recently. Therefore, with advanced technology and rapid changing economy landscape, people will work less in the future.
Display title: 6 文章修订
While Paul acknowledges the possibility of people working overtime in the future, he underestimates the transformative impact of cutting-edge technology. In addition to increasing societal wealth, technology will play a crucial role in shaping the future workplace by automating and replacing many tasks currently performed by individuals. From coding at a computer to delivering fundamental history lessons or serving as an experienced auditor, robots will be capable of executing numerous tasks without human supervision, often outperforming their human counterparts. The primary responsibility of humans will be to monitor and manage these robotic workers diligently, which will be significantly more time-efficient compared to current work practices. Consequently, due to advancements in technology and the rapidly evolving economic landscape, people are likely to work less in the future. (130 words)
While Paul raises a valid point that acknowledges the possibility (revised for clarity and natural tone) of people will unavoidably work working overtime in the future, he fails to predict underestimates (revised for a more accurate description) the revolutionary effect caused by the transformative impact (revised for a stronger expression) of cutting-edge technology. Beyond overall improvement of society In addition to increasing societal wealth, technology plays will play a pivotal crucial role (revised for better emphasis) in future's shaping the future workplace by serving automating and substituting most of individual's work assignments. Coding in front of the computer, giving replacing many tasks currently performed by individuals (revised for clarity). From coding at a computer to delivering fundamental history classes to students, and even lessons or serving as a well-experienced an experienced auditor, robots can perform will be capable of executing numerous tasks without human's guidance human supervision (revised for better flow), often outperforming their human counterparts (revised for clarity). The primary responsibility of humans will be to monitor and some of their manage these robotic workers diligently (revised for better emphasis), which will be significantly more time-efficient compared to current work outcome exceeds human' s outcome. All human being has practices (revised for improved readability). Consequently, due to do is to keep an eye on robots' work consciously and carefully, which is extremely time-saving compared with their work rhythm recently. Therefore, with advanced advancements in technology and rapid changing economy the rapidly evolving economic landscape, people will are likely to work less in the future.future (revised for a more concise conclusion).
8 思维导图
- 标题:未来工作时间的减少
- 副标题:技术的变革性影响
- 社会财富的增加
- 未来工作场所的塑造
- 自动化和替代人类任务
- 编码
- 历史课程教授
- 审计师工作
- 机器人执行任务优势
- 无需人类监督
- 经常超过人类表现
- 副标题:人类的主要责任变化
- 监控和管理机器人工作者
- 时间效率显著提高
9 关键词
| Word | Phonetic Symbol | Part of Speech | English definition | Simplified Chinese translation | Sample sentences |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| transformative | /trænsˈfɔrmətɪv/ | adjective | causing a marked change in someone or something. | 变革性的 | Cutting-edge technology has a transformative impact on the future workplace. |
| automating | /ˈɔtəmeɪtɪŋ/ | verb | convert (a process or facility) to automation. | 自动化 | Robots will be automating many tasks currently performed by individuals. |
| counterparts | /kaʊntərˌpɑrts/ | noun | a person or thing that corresponds to another. | 对应物 | Robots often outperform their human counterparts in executing tasks. |
| diligence | /ˈdɪlɪdʒəns/ | noun | careful and persistent work or effort. | 勤勉 | The primary responsibility of humans will be to monitor and manage robotic workers with diligence. |
| time-efficient | /taɪm ɪˈfɪʃənt/ | adjective | the ability to achieve desired results with less time spent. | 时间效率高的 | Monitoring and managing robotic workers will be significantly more time-efficient compared to current work practices. |
| advancements | /ədˈvænsmənts/ | noun | the process of promoting a cause or plan. | 进步 | Due to advancements in technology, people are likely to work less in the future. |
| economic | /ˌikəˈnɑmɪk/ | adjective | relating to economics or the economy. | 经济的 | The rapidly evolving economic landscape will also contribute to people working less in the future. |
| landscape | /ˈlændskeɪp/ | noun | a particular area of activity or way of life | 活动领域 | The economic landscape is changing rapidly due to technological advancements. |
| diligently | /ˈdɪlɪdʒəntli/ | adverb | with great care and perseverance. | 勤奋地 | Humans will need to diligently monitor and manage robotic workers in the future workplace. |
6 文章修订
尽管Paul承认未来人们可能会加班,但他低估了尖端技术的变革性影响。除了增加社会财富外,技术还将在塑造未来工作场所方面发挥关键作用,通过自动化和替代许多目前由个人完成的任务。从计算机编码到传授基本历史课程,再到担任经验丰富的审计师,机器人将能够在无需人类监督的情况下执行众多任务,并经常超过其人类对应物的表现。人类的主要责任将是勤奋地监控和管理这些机器人工作者,这将比当前的工作实践更具时间效率。因此,由于技术进步和迅速演变的经济格局,未来人们可能会减少工作时间。
Opens the writing question list in the LingoLeap app, not this exact question. Practising needs a free account. AI scoring uses credits, except 3 free scores a day on Practice Test 1 (PQ26-1) questions.
كيف يتم تقييم النقاش الأكاديمي
يتم تقييم مهمة النقاش الأكاديمي في TOEFL بناءً على معايير التقييم الرسمية من ETS. يحلل تقييم الذكاء الاصطناعي كل إجابة عبر عدة أبعاد.
الصلة والمساهمة
هل تعالج الإجابة السؤال وتُقدّم مساهمة ذات معنى في النقاش؟
استخدام اللغة
دقة القواعد، وتنوّع المفردات، وجودة بنية الجمل.
التطوير والدعم
هل تم تطوير الأفكار بشكل جيد باستخدام أمثلة محددة وتعليل واضح؟
الأنماط الشائعة في الإجابات
استنادًا إلى تحليل نماذج المستخدمين لهذه المهمة، إليك الأنماط الشائعة الملاحظة في إجابات الطلاب.
يقدّم كثير من الطلاب آراءً واضحة لكنهم يفتقرون إلى أمثلة داعمة محددة.
تشير الإجابات القوية مباشرةً إلى نص القراءة ووجهات نظر المتحدثين الآخرين.
تستخدم الإجابات ذات الدرجات الأعلى بنى جُمَلية متنوعة ومفردات أكاديمية.
إدارة الوقت عامل أساسي — الإجابات التي تبدو متسرعة تحصل غالبًا على درجة أقل في التطوير.
نصائح للتعلم
اقرأ السؤال بعناية وحدّد جميع أجزائه قبل البدء بالكتابة.
أشر في إجابتك إلى نص القراءة وآراء الطلاب الآخرين.
استخدم أمثلة محددة لدعم فكرتك الرئيسية — تجنّب العبارات العامة.
استهدف 120-150 كلمة. الإجابة الأطول ليست دائمًا أفضل؛ فالوضوح والتركيز أهم.
تدرّب على إجابات محددة الوقت (10 دقائق) لبناء الطلاقة في ظروف الاختبار.
الأسئلة الشائعة
ما هي مهمة المناقشة الأكاديمية في TOEFL؟
كيف يتم تقييم مهمة المناقشة الأكاديمية؟
ما هي عينات المستخدمين الموجودة في هذه الصفحة؟
ما مدى دقة تقييم الذكاء الاصطناعي؟
كيف يمكنني التدرب على مهمة المناقشة الأكاديمية هذه؟
ما الطول المناسب لإجابة المناقشة الأكاديمية؟
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