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TOEFL Academic Discussion Writing Sample: Your professor is teaching a class on computer science. Write a post responding to the professor’s question.

AI 기반 평가와 피드백이 포함된 실제 사용자 제출 답안

사용자 제출 예시 23개 이용 가능

무료 연습 시작하기

과제 개요

Professor

A new story about Artificial Intelligence (AI) is in the news almost every day. And, of course, companies are spending an enormous amount of money to develop new technologies related to AI. Before next class, I want you to consider the following question: Is AI a dangerous technology that, overall, will be harmful to society, or is it a powerful tool that will improve the lives of people?

Megan

Personally, I think AI is a threat. As AI advances, many jobs may become automated, leaving people without work. That will certainly increase income inequality. Additionally, there’s the risk that AI systems could be programmed with biases or used to discriminate against certain groups. We need to be careful and ensure that AI is developed in an ethical and responsible way. Since we can’t guarantee that right now, I think it is best to slow down.

David

I disagree with Megan. I’m of the opinion that AI has the potential to solve many of the world’s problems, from climate change to disease. Additionally, AI can help us make better decisions by analyzing vast amounts of data and identifying patterns that humans may miss. That said, I agree with Megan that we must ensure that AI is developed and used in a responsible way that benefits society as a whole.

사용자 예시 및 평가 결과

1

사용자 예시 #1

As the GPT era comes, the discussion on AI assistance has become increasingly relevant and warrants careful considerations by policy makers and indust...

점수
28

사용자 예시

As the GPT era comes, the discussion on AI assistance has become increasingly relevant and warrants careful considerations by policy makers and industry regulators. In my opinion, AI is a powerful tool that will improve our lives, especially at workplace. I strongly agree with David that AI is able to identify implicit patterns by analyzing big data, contributing to the decision making process. I’d add that AI also enhance our productivity and efficiency at work, as we can finally get rid of repeated tasks and focus on the creative part. Consequently, AI saves our time and allows us to live a more meaningful non-professional life. While Megan raised the valid concern regarding increased unemployment rate and income inequality, she overlooked that AI also create new job positions; for instance, factory workers are replacing by human-machine interaction designers and AI ethicists. To sum up, future education should emphasize more on logical thinking over repetitive imitating.

평가 결과

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 5.0

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.5

  • Language Use and Grammar: 4.5

2. 预估分数

  • 28

3. 任务完成度

这篇文章在任务完成度方面表现良好,成功回答了教授的问题并表达了个人观点。但是,可以进一步改进的地方是在论述中加入更多具体的例子来支持观点。此外,在讨论AI带来的潜在威胁时,可以更详细地说明如何确保AI的负责任开发和使用。

改进建议示例:

  1. 在讨论AI提高工作效率时,可以举一个具体的例子说明AI如何帮助人们节省时间。

  2. 在讨论如何确保AI负责任地开发和使用时,可以提出一些建议或措施,例如政府监管、行业道德准则等。

4. 文章结构与组织

文章结构清晰,包括引言、主体和结论。每段都集中讨论一个特定观点,并提供支持细节。然而,在段落之间增加过渡句子会使文章更连贯。

改进建议示例:

  1. 在引言和主体之间添加过渡句子:“在这篇文章中,我将详细讨论为什么我认为AI是一种有益的技术,并回应Megan提出的一些担忧。”

  2. 在主体段落之间添加过渡句子:“虽然AI可能导致某些职位被淘汰,但我们也应该看到它为其他领域创造了新的就业机会。”

5. 语法批改

As the GPT era comes, the discussion on AI assistance has become increasingly relevant and warrants careful considerations by policy makerspolicymakers(trouble maker (troublemaker)) and industry regulators. In my opinion, AI is a powerful tool that will improve our lives, especially at workplace. I strongly agree with David that AI is able to identify implicit patterns by analyzing big data, contributing to the decision makingdecision-making(decision making (decision-making)) process. I’d add that AI also enhance our productivity and efficiency at work, as we can finally get rid of repeated tasks and focus on the creative part. Consequently, AI saves our time and allows us to live a more meaningful non-professional life. While Megan raised the valid concern regarding increased unemployment rate and income inequality, she overlooked that AI also create new job positions; for instance, factory workers are replacing by human-machine interaction designers and AI ethicists. To sum up, future education should emphasize more on logical thinking over repetitive imitating.

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

As we enter the era of Generative Pre-trained Transformers (GPT), the debate surrounding AI assistance has become increasingly pertinent, necessitating thoughtful deliberation from policymakers and industry regulators. I concur with David that AI is a powerful tool poised to enhance our lives, particularly in the workplace. Its ability to discern subtle patterns through big data analysis significantly contributes to decision-making processes. Furthermore, AI bolsters productivity and efficiency by automating repetitive tasks, allowing us to concentrate on creative endeavors. This not only saves time but also enables us to lead more fulfilling non-professional lives.

While Megan's concerns about rising unemployment rates and income inequality are valid, her perspective neglects the potential for AI to generate new job opportunities. For example, factory workers may transition into roles such as human-machine interaction designers or AI ethicists. Therefore, it is crucial for future education to prioritize logical thinking over rote imitation in order to adapt effectively to this technological landscape. (161 words)

As the GPT we enter the era comes, the discussion on of Generative Pre-trained Transformers (GPT) [rephrased for clarity and accuracy], the debate surrounding AI assistance has become increasingly relevant and warrants careful considerations by policy makers pertinent [changed "relevant" to "pertinent" for better word choice], necessitating thoughtful deliberation from policymakers and industry regulators. In my opinion, I concur with David that AI is a powerful tool that will improve poised to enhance our lives, especially at workplace. I strongly agree with David that AI is able to identify implicit particularly in the workplace [rephrased for better flow]. Its ability to discern subtle patterns through big data analysis significantly contributes to decision-making processes [rephrased for clarity]. Furthermore, AI bolsters productivity and efficiency by analyzing big data, contributing to the decision making process. I’d add that AI automating repetitive tasks, allowing us to concentrate on creative endeavors [rephrased for better flow]. This not only saves time but also enhance our productivity and efficiency at work, as we can finally get rid of repeated tasks and focus on the creative part. Consequently, AI saves our time and allows enables us to live a lead more meaningful fulfilling non-professional life. lives [rephrased for clarity].

While Megan raised the valid concern regarding increased Megan's concerns about rising unemployment rate rates and income inequality, she overlooked that AI also create inequality are valid, her perspective neglects the potential for AI to generate new job positions; for instance, opportunities [rephrased for better flow]. For example, factory workers are replacing by may transition into roles such as human-machine interaction designers and AI ethicists. To sum up, or AI ethicists [added examples for clarity]. Therefore, it is crucial for future education should emphasize more on to prioritize logical thinking over repetitive imitating.rote imitation in order to adapt effectively to this technological landscape [rephrased conclusion for better flow and emphasis on main point].

Title: 8 思维导图


1. Generative Pre-trained Transformers (GPT)

2. AI assistance debate

3. Big data analysis

4. Productivity and efficiency

5. Creative endeavors

6. Unemployment rates and income inequality

7. New job opportunities

8. Future education priorities

Title: 9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionSimplified Chinese TranslationSample Sentence
Generative/ˈdʒɛnərətɪv/adjectiveCapable of producing or creating something生成的The generative model can create new data instances based on the patterns it has learned from the training data.
Pre-trained/priːˈtreɪnd/adjectiveTrained in advance, before being used预先训练的The pre-trained model was fine-tuned for our specific task to achieve better results.
Transformers/trænsˈfɔrmərz/nounA type of deep learning model that processes input data in parallel rather than sequentially变压器Transformers have shown great success in natural language processing tasks such as translation and summarization.
Big data analysis/bɪg ˈdeɪtə əˈnæləsɪs/nounThe process of examining large and varied sets of data to uncover hidden patterns, trends, and insights大数据分析Big data analysis helps businesses make more informed decisions by providing valuable insights.
Productivity/ˌprɒdʌkˈtɪvəti/nounThe state or quality of being productive, especially in terms of work output生产力Implementing AI solutions can greatly improve productivity in various industries.
Creative endeavors/kriˈeɪtɪv ɛnˈdɛvərz/nounEfforts or attempts to create something new or original创造性努力AI can help automate repetitive tasks, allowing humans to focus on creative endeavors.
Unemployment rates/ʌnɪmˈplɔɪmənt reɪts/nounThe percentage of the total labor force that is unemployed but actively seeking employment and willing to work失业率The impact of AI on unemployment rates is a major concern for policymakers.
Income inequality/ˈɪnkəm ˌinikˈwæləti/nounThe unequal distribution of income within a population收入不平等Income inequality has been exacerbated by the rapid advancement of technology.
Human-machine interaction/hjumən məˈʃin ˌintərækʃ(ə)n/nounThe study and design of communication between people and computers人机交互Human-machine interaction designers are responsible for creating intuitive interfaces between users and machines.

Academic Discussion 채점 방식

TOEFL Academic Discussion 과제는 ETS 공식 채점 기준에 따라 평가됩니다. AI 평가는 여러 측면에서 각 답안을 분석합니다.

관련성 및 기여도

답안이 질문에 답하고 토론에 의미 있게 기여하는가?

언어 사용

문법 정확성, 어휘 범위, 문장 구조의 질.

전개 및 근거

구체적인 예시와 명확한 논리로 아이디어가 잘 전개되었는가?

답안에서 나타나는 공통 패턴

이 과제에 대한 사용자 제출 답안을 분석한 결과, 학생 답안에서 관찰된 공통 패턴은 다음과 같습니다.

많은 학생이 명확한 의견을 제시하지만 구체적인 뒷받침 예시가 부족합니다.

높은 점수를 받은 답안은 리딩 지문과 다른 참여자의 의견을 직접 인용합니다.

점수가 높은 답안은 다양한 문장 구조와 학술적 어휘를 사용합니다.

시간 관리는 핵심 요소입니다 — 서두른 느낌을 주는 답안은 전개 항목에서 낮은 점수를 받는 경향이 있습니다.

학습 팁

1

글을 쓰기 전에 프롬프트를 꼼꼼히 읽고 질문의 모든 부분을 파악하세요.

2

답안에서 리딩 지문과 다른 학생들의 의견을 언급하세요.

3

핵심 주장을 뒷받침할 구체적인 예시를 사용하고, 일반적인 진술은 피하세요.

4

120~150단어를 목표로 하세요. 답안이 길다고 항상 좋은 것은 아니며, 명료함과 초점이 더 중요합니다.

5

시험 조건에서 유창하게 답하기 위해 시간을 정해(10분) 연습하세요.

자주 묻는 질문

TOEFL Academic Discussion 과제란 무엇인가요?
TOEFL Academic Discussion 과제는 온라인 수업 토론에 참여하는 것을 요구합니다. 교수의 질문과 다른 학생들의 답변을 읽은 후, 약 10분 안에 자신의 의견을 표현하고 뒷받침하는 글을 작성하게 됩니다.
Academic Discussion 과제는 어떻게 채점되나요?
이 과제는 토론과의 관련성, 언어 사용의 질(문법, 어휘, 문장 구조), 그리고 구체적인 예시와 근거를 통해 아이디어를 얼마나 잘 전개하고 뒷받침하는지를 기준으로 0~5점 척도로 채점됩니다.
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이 Academic Discussion 과제를 어떻게 연습할 수 있나요?
무료 LingoLeap 계정에 가입하여 연습할 수 있습니다. 바로 이 질문에 대한 답변을 직접 작성하여 제출하면, 글쓰기에 대한 상세한 피드백과 함께 즉시 AI 평가를 받을 수 있습니다.
Academic Discussion 답변은 얼마나 길게 써야 하나요?
120~150단어를 목표로 하세요. 이 과제는 답변을 작성할 10분의 시간을 제공합니다. 더 긴 답변을 쓰기보다는 명확성, 구체적인 예시로 의견을 뒷받침하는 것, 토론 맥락을 참조하는 것에 집중하세요.

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