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TOEFL Academic Discussion Writing Sample: Your professor is teaching a class on marketing. Write a post responding to the professor’s question.

AI-संचालित मूल्यांकन और फीडबैक के साथ वास्तविक यूज़र सबमिशन

112 यूज़र-सबमिटेड सैंपल उपलब्ध हैं

फ्री प्रैक्टिस शुरू करें

Task का अवलोकन

Professor

Today, we’re discussing the ethics of targeted advertising. Some people argue that online advertising which uses personal information to target specific people is an invasion of privacy. Others argue that it’s simply an acceptable way to reach consumers with products and services they’re interested in. What’s your take? Do you think targeted advertising is ethical, or is it an invasion of privacy?

Student A

I think targeted advertising is an invasion of privacy. Advertisers shouldn’t be able to track and use our personal information to sell us products. It’s not fair to consumers, and it’s a violation of our rights. Instead, advertisers should focus on creating high-quality ads that appeal to a broad audience. By doing that they can both increase their sales and show respect for their customers.

Student B

I disagree with Jessica. I think targeted advertising is ethical. It’s a more efficient way to reach consumers with products and services that are relevant to their interests. With the money they save by using more effective marketing techniques, companies can afford to offer lower prices to their customers. Plus, we can always opt-out of targeted advertising by adjusting our privacy settings. As long we get a choice, I think targeted advertising can be beneficial

यूज़र सैंपल्स और मूल्यांकन परिणाम

1

यूज़र सैंपल #1

To a certain extent,admittedly targeted advertising has become an efficient way to purchase products.Nevertheless,we can not emphasize the importance ...

अंक
22

यूज़र सैंपल

To a certain extent,admittedly targeted advertising has become an efficient way to purchase products.Nevertheless,we can not emphasize the importance of protecting our privacy.I am inclined to believe that targeted advertisting is an invasion of privacy.In my view,it is prone to exert an adverse impact on daily life.When acquiring our privacy, some people are intended to harass us by calling or texting us.What angered us is that it tends to ruin our lives.If cheaters obtain our personal information,some people with low identification ability tend to be easily tricked.For example, my cousin was cheated out of money because he filled in his personal information on a shopping app.

मूल्यांकन परिणाम

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5

  • Language Use and Grammar: 3.5

2. 预估分数

22. 3 任务完成度

您的文章在回应讨论问题方面做得很好,但在阐述观点和语言使用方面还有待提高。首先,在表达观点时,可以尝试提供更多具体的例子和详细信息来支持您的看法。其次,在语言使用方面,注意避免出现语法错误和不清晰的表达。

改进示例1(英文): Instead of saying "it is prone to exert an adverse impact on daily life," you could provide a specific example, such as "targeted advertising can lead to unwanted spam emails, which can be annoying and time-consuming for users."

改进示例2(英文): Instead of saying "some people with low identification ability tend to be easily tricked," you could say "individuals who are not familiar with online security measures may fall victim to scams or identity theft due to targeted advertising."

4. 文章结构与组织

从组织结构上看,您的文章需要更明确地划分引言、正文和结论部分。此外,每个段落应专注于一个特定观点,并提供支持细节。同时,注意在段落之间使用清晰的过渡词或短语。

改进示例1(英文): Add an introduction sentence at the beginning of your essay, such as "In the debate on targeted advertising, I believe that it is an invasion of privacy due to its potential negative consequences."

改进示例2(英文): Use transition words or phrases to connect your ideas, such as "Moreover" or "On the other hand." For example, you could say "Moreover, targeted advertising can lead to unwanted spam emails, which can be annoying and time-consuming for users."

5. 语法批改

To a certain extent,admittedly, admittedly(Use of whitespace before comma and before/after parentheses) targeted advertising has become an efficient way to purchase products.Nevertheless Nevertheless(Missing space between sentences),we, we(Use of whitespace before comma and before/after parentheses) can not emphasize the importance of protecting our privacy.I I(Missing space between sentences) am inclined to believe that targeted advertistingadvertising(misspelling) is an invasion of privacy.In In(Missing space between sentences) my view,it, it(Use of whitespace before comma and before/after parentheses) is prone to exert an adverse impact on daily life.When When(Missing space between sentences) acquiring our privacy, some people are intended to harass us by calling or texting us.What What(Missing space between sentences) angered us is that it tends to ruin our lives.If If(Missing space between sentences) cheaters obtain our personal information,some, some(Use of whitespace before comma and before/after parentheses) people with low identification ability tend to be easily tricked.For For(Missing space between sentences) example, my cousin was cheated out of money because he filled in his personal information on a shopping app.

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

While targeted advertising can be an efficient method for promoting products, the protection of personal privacy should not be overlooked. I believe that targeted advertising constitutes an invasion of privacy, as it can potentially have negative consequences on our daily lives. The acquisition of personal information may lead to harassment through unwanted calls or messages, causing significant distress. Furthermore, if fraudsters gain access to such information, individuals with limited discernment may fall victim to scams. For instance, my cousin lost money after providing his personal details on a shopping app. (95 words)

To a certain extent,admittedly Revised essay: Section Title: 7 Article Correction

While targeted advertising has become can be an efficient way to purchase products.Nevertheless,we can method for promoting products (clarified phrasing for better understanding), the protection of personal privacy should not emphasize the importance of protecting our privacy.I am inclined to be overlooked (improved sentence structure). I believe that targeted advertisting is advertising constitutes an invasion of privacy.In my view,it is prone privacy (rephrased for clarity), as it can potentially have negative consequences on our daily lives (simplified phrasing). The acquisition of personal information may lead to exert an adverse impact on daily life.When acquiring our privacy, some people are intended harassment through unwanted calls or messages, causing significant distress (revised sentence structure). Furthermore, if fraudsters gain access to harass us by calling or texting us.What angered us is that it tends such information, individuals with limited discernment may fall victim to ruin our lives.If cheaters obtain our personal information,some people with low identification ability tend to be easily tricked.For example, scams (improved phrasing for clarity). For instance, my cousin was cheated out of lost money because he filled in after providing his personal information details on a shopping app.app (rephrased for better understanding).

Display title: 8 思维导图

Mindmap:

1. Introduction
   - Targeted advertising
   - Privacy concerns

2. Invasion of privacy
   - Personal information acquisition
   - Harassment and distress

3. Negative consequences
   - Unwanted calls/messages
   - Fraud and scams

4. Personal example
   - Cousin's experience with shopping app

5. Conclusion
   - Balancing targeted advertising and privacy protection 

Display title: 9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionSimplified Chinese TranslationSample Sentence
targeted/ˈtɑːrɡɪtɪd/adjdirected or used toward a specific object针对性的Targeted advertising can be an efficient method for promoting products.
invasion/ɪnˈveɪʒən/nan unwelcome intrusion into another's domain侵犯I believe that targeted advertising constitutes an invasion of privacy.
harassment/həˈræsmənt/naggressive pressure or intimidation骚扰The acquisition of personal information may lead to harassment through unwanted calls or messages.
discernment/dɪˈsɜrn.mənt/nthe ability to judge well辨别力Individuals with limited discernment may fall victim to scams.
fraudster/ˈfrɔːd.stər//n//a person who commits fraud//骗子//If fraudsters gain access to such information, they can take advantage of unsuspecting individuals./
scam/skæm/na dishonest scheme or fraud骗局My cousin lost money after falling for a scam on a shopping app.
acquisition/ˌæk.wɪˈzɪʃ.ən/nthe act of obtaining something获取The acquisition of personal information can lead to negative consequences.
distress/dɪˈstres/nextreme anxiety, sorrow, or pain痛苦Harassment through unwanted calls or messages can cause significant distress.
privacy/ˈpraɪ.və.si//n//the state of being free from public attention//隐私//The protection of personal privacy should not be overlooked in targeted advertising./

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

While targeted advertising can be an efficient method for promoting products, the protection of personal privacy should not be overlooked. I believe that targeted advertising constitutes an invasion of privacy, as it can potentially have negative consequences on our daily lives. The acquisition of personal information may lead to harassment through unwanted calls or messages, causing significant distress. Furthermore, if fraudsters gain access to such information, individuals with limited discernment may fall victim to scams. For instance, my cousin lost money after providing his personal details on a shopping app.

2

यूज़र सैंपल #2

I agree with Mike’s idea that we can just opt-out of targeted advertising if we’re worried about it. On top of that, I frimly believe that target adve...

यूज़र सैंपल

I agree with Mike’s idea that we can just opt-out of targeted advertising if we’re worried about it. On top of that, I frimly believe that target advertising isn’t an ethical problem, as it provides people with proper and understamdable guidance to avoid data privacy issues. To elaborate, it is extremely easy to protect our personal data nowadays since Internet browsers are very user-friendly. Even people who are inexperienced with technology can find the right settings and adjust them. Furthermore, society is more diverse than before, so it is almost impossible to create a message that everyone finds attractive. Small companies without large advertising and research budgets might go out of business if they are prevented from using cheap and effective target advertising. Still, Jessica raises a relevant point that companies should create advertisements that appeal to a broad audience. Ironically, she didn’t mention how difficult it is to make advertisements like that.

मूल्यांकन परिणाम

1. Sub Scores

Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5 Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0 Language Use and Grammar: 4.0

2. Estimated Scores

Estimated Score: 27

3. Task completeness

The essay does a good job of addressing the task requirements by expressing a personal opinion and contributing to the discussion. However, there is room for improvement in terms of elaborating on the viewpoint and providing more specific examples or details to support the argument.

Suggestions for improvement:

  • Provide more concrete examples of how targeted advertising benefits both consumers and businesses.

  • Discuss potential drawbacks or concerns related to targeted advertising, such as data privacy issues, and how they can be mitigated.

Examples:

  1. "For instance, targeted advertising allows small businesses with limited budgets to reach their niche audience more effectively, resulting in better sales performance."
  2. "While there are concerns about data privacy, companies can implement strict data protection policies and inform users about their rights regarding personal information usage."

4. Essay structure and organization

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, it could benefit from better organization within the body paragraphs and clearer transitions between ideas.

Suggestions for improvement:

  • Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to introduce the main point.

  • Improve transitions between ideas by using appropriate linking words or phrases.

Examples:

  1. "Firstly, it is important to consider that targeted advertising allows for greater efficiency in reaching potential customers."
  2. "On the other hand, some may argue that targeted advertising can lead to privacy concerns; however, there are ways to address these issues."

5. Grammar

I agree with Mike's idea that we can just opt-out of targeted advertising if we're worried about it. On top of that, I frimlyfirmly believe that targettargeted advertising isn't an ethical problem, as it provides people with proper and understamdableunderstandable guidance to avoid data privacy issues. To elaborate, it is extremely easy to protect our personal data nowadays since Internet browsers are very user-friendly. Even people who are inexperienced with technology can find the right settings and adjust them. Furthermore, society is more diverse than before, so it is almost impossible to create a message that everyone finds attractive. Small companies without large advertising and research budgets might go out of business if they are prevented from using cheap and effective target advertising. Still, Jessica raises a relevant point that companies should create advertisements that appeal to a broad audience. Ironically, she didn't mention how difficult it is to make advertisements like that.

Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I concur with Mike's perspective that users can simply opt-out of targeted advertising if they have concerns about privacy. Moreover, I firmly believe that targeted advertising does not pose an ethical dilemma, as it offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues.

To elaborate, protecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today's digital age, as internet browsers are designed to be user-friendly. Even those who lack technological expertise can easily locate and adjust the necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally. Small businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

While Jessica raises a valid point about the importance of creating advertisements that cater to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges associated with producing such content. (157 words)

Revised essay: Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I concur (agree with Mike’s idea that we changed to concur for a more formal tone) with Mike's perspective that users can just simply opt-out of targeted advertising if we’re worried they have concerns about it. On top of that, privacy. Moreover, I firmly (frimly corrected to firmly) believe that target advertising isn’t targeted advertising does not pose an ethical problem, dilemma, as it provides people with proper offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible (understamdable corrected to comprehensible) guidance to avoid circumvent data privacy issues.

To elaborate, it is protecting personal data has become increasingly accessible (extremely easy to protect our personal data nowadays since Internet changed to increasingly accessible for a more precise description) in today's digital age, as internet browsers are very designed to be user-friendly. Even people those who are lack technological expertise (inexperienced with technology changed to lack technological expertise for clearer expression) can find the right settings easily locate and adjust them. Furthermore, the necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society (society changed to contemporary society for better context) is more diverse than ever before, so making it is almost nearly impossible to create craft a message that everyone finds attractive. appeals universally. Small companies without large businesses with limited advertising and research budgets might go out of business may struggle to survive if they are prevented barred from using cheap and effective target advertising. utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

Still, While Jessica raises a valid point (relevant point that companies should create changed to valid point for better clarity) about the importance of creating advertisements that appeal cater to a broad audience. Ironically, audience, she didn’t mention how difficult it is to make advertisements like that.fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges associated with producing such content.

Display title: 8 Mind Map


1. Introduction
   - Mike's perspective
   - No ethical dilemma

2. Protecting personal data
   - Accessible tools
   - User-friendly browsers

3. Diversity in society
   - Difficult to appeal universally

4. Small businesses
   - Limited budgets
   - Need for targeted advertising

5. Jessica's point of view
   - Broad audience catering importance

6. Challenges in broad content creation

7. Conclusion 

Display title: 9 Key Words

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionEnglish TranslationSample Sentence
concur/kənˈkər/verbTo agree or have the same opinionagreeI concur with Mike's perspective that users can simply opt-out of targeted advertising if they have concerns about privacy.
ethical dilemma/ˈɛθɪkəl dɪˈlɛmə/nounA situation in which a difficult choice must be made between two or more morally conflicting alternatives.moral conflictTargeted advertising does not pose an ethical dilemma, as it offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues.
user-friendly/ˈjuːzər ˈfrɛndli/adjectiveEasy to use or understandeasy to useInternet browsers are designed to be user-friendly, allowing even those who lack technological expertise to easily locate and adjust the necessary settings.
contemporary/kənˈtɛmpəreri/adjectiveBelonging to or occurring in the presentcurrentContemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally.
diverse/daɪˈvərs/adjectiveShowing a great deal of variety; very differentvariedThe diversity in today's society makes it difficult to create advertisements that cater to a broad audience.
targeted advertising/ˈtɑrɡɪtəd ˈædvərtaɪzɪŋ/nounA form of advertising where online advertisers can use demographic information to show ads to specific users.focused marketingSmall businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.
inherent/ɪnˈhɪrənt/adjectiveExisting in something as a permanent, essential, or characteristic attributeintrinsicJessica fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges associated with producing content that caters to a broad audience.
accessible/əkˈsɛsəbəl/adjectiveEasy to approach or reachreachableProtecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today's digital age.
acknowledge/əkˈnɒlɪdʒ/verbTo accept or admit the existence or truth ofrecognizeShe fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges associated with producing such content.

Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I concur with Mike's perspective that users can simply opt-out of targeted advertising if they have concerns about privacy. Moreover, I firmly believe that targeted advertising does not pose an ethical dilemma, as it offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues.

To elaborate, protecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today's digital age, as internet browsers are designed to be user-friendly. Even those who lack technological expertise can easily locate and adjust the necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally. Small businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

While Jessica raises a valid point about the importance of creating advertisements that cater to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges associated with producing such content.

3

यूज़र सैंपल #3

I agree with Mike’s idea that we can just opt-out of targeted advertising if we’re worried about it. On top of that, I frimly believes that target adv...

यूज़र सैंपल

I agree with Mike’s idea that we can just opt-out of targeted advertising if we’re worried about it. On top of that, I frimly believes that target advertising isn’t an ethical problems, as it provides people with proper and understamdable guidance to avoid data priracy. To elaborate, it is extremely easy to protect our personal data nowadays since Internet browsers are very user-friendly. Even people that are inexperienced with technology can find the right settings and adjust them. Furthermore, society is more diverse than before, so it is almost impossible to create a message that everyone finds attractive. Small companies without large advertising and research budgets might go out of business if they are prevented from using cheap and effective target advertising. Still, jessica raises a relevantpoints that companies shold create advertisements that appeal to broad audience. Ironically, She didn’t mention how difficult it is to make advertisements like that.

मूल्यांकन परिणाम

1. Sub Scores

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0

  • Language Use and Grammar: 3.5

2. Estimated Scores

Estimated Score: 25

3. Task completeness

The essay effectively addresses the task by expressing a personal opinion and contributing to the discussion in your own words. However, there is room for improvement in elaborating on your viewpoint with more specific examples or details. Additionally, some grammar errors and unclear language use are present.

Suggestions for improvement:

  • Provide more specific examples or details to support your viewpoint.

  • Revise grammar errors and improve language use for clarity.

Examples in English:

  1. "To elaborate, it is extremely easy to protect our personal data nowadays since Internet browsers are very user-friendly." -> "To elaborate, modern internet browsers offer user-friendly privacy settings that allow users to easily protect their personal data from targeted advertising."

  2. "Small companies without large advertising and research budgets might go out of business if they are prevented from using cheap and effective target advertising." -> "Small companies with limited advertising budgets may struggle to compete if they cannot utilize cost-effective targeted advertising methods."

4. Essay structure and organization

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion. However, some paragraphs could be better organized with clearer transitions between ideas.

Suggestions for improvement:

  • Improve paragraph organization by focusing on one main point per paragraph.

  • Use clear transitions between ideas and paragraphs.

Examples in English:

  1. Instead of combining two different points in one paragraph like this: "To elaborate, it is extremely easy... Small companies without large advertising...", separate them into two distinct paragraphs.

  2. Add transition phrases such as "On the other hand" or "In addition" at the beginning of paragraphs to signal a shift in focus or the introduction of a new idea.

5. Grammar

I agree with Mike's idea that we can just opt-out of targeted advertising if we're worried about it. On top of that, I frimly believesfirmly believe that targettargeted advertising isn't an ethical problems,problem, as it provides people with proper and understamdableunderstandable guidance to avoid data priracy. privacy issues. To elaborate, it is extremely easy to protect our personal data nowadays since Internet browsers are very user-friendly. Even people thatwho are inexperienced with technology can find the right settings and adjust them. Furthermore, society is more diverse than before, so it is almost impossible to create a message that everyone finds attractive. Small companies without large advertising and research budgets might go out of business if they are prevented from using cheap and effective target advertising. Still, jessicaJessica raises a relevantpointsrelevant point that companies sholdshould create advertisements that appeal to broad audience. Ironically, Sheshe didn't mention how difficult it is to make advertisements like that.

Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I concur with Mike's perspective that users can simply opt-out of targeted advertising if they have concerns about privacy. Moreover, I firmly believe that targeted advertising is not an ethical issue, as it offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible guidance to prevent data breaches.

To elaborate, protecting personal information has become increasingly accessible due to user-friendly internet browsers. Even those who are not technologically adept can easily locate and adjust the necessary settings. Additionally, society has become more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a universally appealing message. Small businesses lacking substantial advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

While Jessica raises a valid point regarding the importance of creating advertisements that appeal to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges in doing so. (146 words)

Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I agree concur with Mike’s idea Mike's perspective (Changed "agree" to "concur" for a more formal tone) that we users can just simply opt-out of targeted advertising if we’re worried they have concerns about it. On top of that, privacy. Moreover, I frimly believes firmly (Corrected "frimly" to "firmly") believe that target advertising isn’t targeted advertising is not an ethical problems, issue, as it provides people with offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible (Changed "proper and understamdable" to "appropriate and comprehensible" for clarity) guidance to prevent data breaches (Changed "data priracy" to "data breaches" for proper and understamdable guidance to avoid data priracy. spelling and terminology).

To elaborate, it is extremely easy to protect our protecting personal data nowadays since Internet browsers information has become increasingly accessible due to user-friendly internet browsers. Even those who are very user-friendly. Even people that are inexperienced not technologically adept (Changed "inexperienced with technology technology" to "not technologically adept" for better word choice) can find easily locate and adjust the right settings and adjust them. Furthermore, necessary settings. Additionally, society is has become more diverse than ever before, so making it is almost nearly impossible to create a message that everyone finds attractive. craft a universally appealing message. Small companies without large businesses lacking substantial advertising and research budgets might go out of business may struggle to survive if they are prevented barred from using cheap and effective target advertising. utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

Still, jessica While Jessica raises a relevantpoints that companies shold create valid point (Changed "relevantpoints" to "valid point") regarding the importance of creating advertisements that appeal to a broad audience. Ironically, She didn’t mention how difficult it is to make advertisements like that.audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges in doing so (Rephrased sentence for clarity).

Display title: 8 Mind Map


1. Targeted Advertising
   1.1 Ethical Issue?
       1.1.1 Privacy Concerns
       1.1.2 Opt-out Options
   1.2 Benefits
       1.2.1 Appropriate Guidance
       1.2.2 Prevent Data Breaches

2. Personal Information Protection
   2.1 User-friendly Browsers
   2.2 Accessibility for Non-tech Users

3. Diverse Society & Advertising Challenges
   3.1 Universally Appealing Message Difficulties
   3.2 Small Business Struggles

4. Counterargument: Broad Audience Appeal Importance 

Display title: 9 Key Words

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionEnglish TranslationSample Sentences
concur/kənˈkɜr/verbto agreeagreeI concur with Mike's perspective that users can simply opt-out of targeted advertising...
targeted/ˈtɑrɡɪtɪd/adjectivedirected or used toward a particular object or goaldirected...targeted advertising is not an ethical issue...
ethical/ˈɛθɪkəl/adjective/pertaining to or dealing with morals or principles/moral, principled/...targeted advertising is not an ethical issue...
comprehensible/ˌkɒmprɪˈhensəbəl//adjective/able to be understood; intelligible/understandable/...it offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible guidance to prevent data breaches.
user-friendly/ˈjuːzər ˈfrɛndli//adjective/easy to use or understand/easy-to-use/...protecting personal information has become increasingly accessible due to user-friendly internet browsers.
diverse/daɪˈvɜrs, dɪ-, ˈdaɪ-/adjectiveshowing a great deal of varietyvariedAdditionally, society has become more diverse than ever before...
universally/juːnɪˈvɜrsəli/adverbin a way that relates to all people or thingsall-encompassingly...making it nearly impossible to craft a universally appealing message.
inherent/ɪnˈhɪrənt, -ˈhɛr-/adjectiveexisting in something as a permanent characteristicintrinsic...she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges in doing so.
counterargument/ˈkaʊntər ˌɑrgjʊmənt//noun/an argument or set of reasons put forward to oppose an idea or theory developed in another argument.opposing argumentWhile Jessica raises a valid point regarding the importance of creating advertisements that appeal to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenges in doing so.
4

यूज़र सैंपल #4

In response to the professor’s question, I concur with Claire’s perspective that online reviews have some problems, as there are always negative revie...

अंक
22

यूज़र सैंपल

In response to the professor’s question, I concur with Claire’s perspective that online reviews have some problems, as there are always negative reviews on the Internet and the realness of the reviews are low. I’d add that some reviews online may not be posed by customers. Since the seller would use their friends、family and many other tactics such as positive feedback cashback to attract more customers. Andrew raised the relevant point that reviews are written by original customers. But she didn’t mention that everyone’s flavor is different, one’s preference isn’t suitable for you. Overall I think watching reviews online before buying something isn’t useful.

मूल्यांकन परिणाम

1. 子项得分

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.0

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 3.5

  • Language Use and Grammar: 3.5

2. 预估分数

22. 3 任务完成度

这篇文章在回答问题方面做得不错,但仍有改进的空间。首先,可以提供更多具体的例子来支持观点。其次,在解释为什么在线评论可能不真实时,可以详细说明一下负面现象。最后,注意使用恰当的词汇和语法。

示例1(改进前):Since the seller would use their friends、family and many other tactics such as positive feedback cashback to attract more customers. 示例1(改进后):Sellers may use various tactics, such as asking friends or family members to leave positive reviews or offering cashback incentives for good feedback, which can distort the authenticity of online reviews.

示例2(改进前):But she didn’t mention that everyone’s flavor is different, one’s preference isn’t suitable for you. 示例2(改进后):However, it is important to consider that individual preferences vary, and what one person enjoys might not necessarily align with another person's tastes.

4. 文章结构与组织

文章的结构和组织方面还有待加强。首先,需要添加一个引言部分来引入主题,并在结尾部分总结观点。其次,在正文段落中,应更明确地表达每个观点,并使用恰当的过渡词汇来连接不同的想法。

示例1(改进前):In response to the professor’s question, I concur with Claire’s perspective that online reviews have some problems... 示例1(改进后):In response to the professor's question, I would like to express my agreement with Claire's perspective on the issues surrounding online reviews. To begin with...

示例2(改进前):Andrew raised the relevant point that reviews are written by original customers. 示例2(改进后):Although Andrew raises a valid point about reviews being written by genuine customers, it is crucial to consider that...

5. 语法批改

In response to the professor’s question, I concur with Claire’s perspective that online reviews have some problems, as there are always negative reviews on the Internet and the realness of the reviews are low. I’d add that some reviews online may not be posed by customers. Since the seller would use their friends、family[No Replacement Word Found](misspelling) and many other tactics such as positive feedback cashback to attract more customers. Andrew raised the relevant point that reviews are written by original customers. But she didn’t mention that everyone’s flavor is different, one’s preference isn’t suitable for you. OverallOverall,(This rule identifies whether commas are missing in a sentence.) I think watching reviews online before buying something isn’t useful.

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

In response to Dr. Gupta's inquiry, I agree with Claire's viewpoint that online reviews present certain challenges, primarily due to the prevalence of negative feedback and the questionable authenticity of some reviews. Furthermore, it is essential to consider that some online reviews may not be genuine customer experiences, as sellers often employ various tactics such as enlisting friends and family or offering cashback incentives for positive feedback. While Andrew highlights the value of reviews from ordinary customers, it is crucial to remember that individual preferences vary greatly, and what suits one person may not necessarily be suitable for another. Consequently, relying solely on online reviews when making purchasing decisions may not prove beneficial. (118 words)

In response to Dr. Gupta's inquiry (clarifying the professor’s question, relationship between the speaker and the professor), I concur agree with Claire’s perspective Claire's viewpoint that online reviews have some problems, as there are always present certain challenges (rephrasing for clarity and formality), primarily due to the prevalence of negative reviews on the Internet feedback and the realness questionable authenticity of the some reviews are low. I’d add (rephrasing for clarity). Furthermore, it is essential to consider that some online reviews online may not be posed by customers. Since the seller would use their friends、family and many other genuine customer experiences (rephrasing for clarity), as sellers often employ various tactics such as enlisting friends and family or offering cashback incentives for positive feedback cashback (providing specific examples). While Andrew highlights the value of reviews from ordinary customers (acknowledging Andrew's point), it is crucial to attract more customers. Andrew raised the relevant point remember that reviews are written by original customers. But she didn’t mention that everyone’s flavor is different, one’s preference isn’t individual preferences vary greatly, and what suits one person may not necessarily be suitable for you. Overall I think watching another (explaining why Andrew's point may not be sufficient). Consequently, relying solely on online reviews online before buying something isn’t useful.when making purchasing decisions may not prove beneficial (summarizing the main argument).

Display title: 8 思维导图


1. Online Reviews
   1.1 Challenges
       1.1.1 Negative feedback
       1.1.2 Questionable authenticity
   1.2 Genuine customer experiences
       1.2.1 Tactics by sellers
           1.2.1.1 Friends and family
           1.2.1.2 Cashback incentives
   2. Individual Preferences
       2.1 Variability in suitability
   3. Purchasing Decisions
       3.1 Relying solely on online reviews may not be beneficial

Display title: 9 关键词

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish definitionSimplified Chinese translationSample sentences
prevalence/ˈprɛvələns/nounthe fact or condition of being prevalent; widespread流行,盛行The prevalence of negative feedback in online reviews can be misleading to potential customers.
authenticity/ɔːθənˈtɪsɪti/nounthe quality of being genuine or true真实性,可靠性The authenticity of some online reviews is questionable, making it difficult to trust them completely.
tactics/ˈtæktɪks/nouna plan or strategy for achieving a particular goal策略,手段Sellers often employ various tactics to manipulate online reviews, such as offering cashback incentives for positive feedback.
preferences/ˈprɛfərəns/nouna greater liking for one alternative over another偏好,喜好Individual preferences vary greatly, so what suits one person may not necessarily be suitable for another.
variability/ˌvɛəriəˈbɪlɪti/nounthe quality of being subject to change or variation变化性,多样性The variability in individual preferences makes relying solely on online reviews less reliable.
beneficial/ˌbɛnəˈfɪʃəl/adjectiveresulting in good; favorable or advantageous有益的,有利的Relying solely on online reviews when making purchasing decisions may not prove beneficial.
inquiry/ɪnˈkwaɪri/nounan act of asking for information询问,调查In response to Dr. Gupta's inquiry, I agree with Claire's viewpoint on the challenges of online reviews.
cashback/ˈkæʃbæk/nouna sum of money paid back to a customer after a purchase返现Sellers often offer cashback incentives to encourage customers to leave positive feedback.
misleading/mɪsˈliːdɪŋ/adjectivegiving the wrong idea or impression误导性的The prevalence of negative feedback in online reviews can be misleading to potential customers.
5

यूज़र सैंपल #5

I concur with Mike’s perspective that users can simply opt-out of target advertisements if they have concern about piracy. Moreover, I firmly believe ...

यूज़र सैंपल

I concur with Mike’s perspective that users can simply opt-out of target advertisements if they have concern about piracy. Moreover, I firmly believe that target advertising does not pose an ethical dilemma, as it offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues. To elaborate, proctecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today’s digital age, as internet browsers are designed to be user-friendly. Even those who lack technical expertise can easily locate and adjust necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally. Small businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods. While Jessica raises valid points about the importance of creating cater to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenge associated with producing such content.

मूल्यांकन परिणाम

1. Sub Scores

  • Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5

  • Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0

  • Language Use and Grammar: 4.0

2. Estimated Scores

Estimated Score: 27

3. Task completeness

The essay does a good job of addressing the specific requirements of the task, expressing a personal opinion, and contributing to the discussion in their own words. However, there is room for improvement in elaborating on the viewpoint and providing more specific examples or details to support the argument.

Suggestions for improvement:

  • Provide more concrete examples of how targeted advertising benefits both consumers and businesses.

  • Explain further why you believe targeted advertising does not pose an ethical dilemma.

Examples:

  1. "For instance, targeted advertising can help small businesses reach their niche audience more effectively, resulting in increased sales and customer satisfaction."
  2. "Moreover, as long as companies are transparent about their data collection practices and give users control over their privacy settings, targeted advertising can be conducted ethically."

4. Essay structure and organization

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion. The organization is mostly logical; however, transitions between ideas could be improved for better flow.

Suggestions for improvement:

  • Improve transitions between ideas to create a smoother flow throughout the essay.

  • Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main point with supporting details.

Examples:

  1. Instead of jumping directly from discussing privacy settings to diversity in society, use a transition like "Furthermore" or "In addition" to connect these ideas.
  2. When discussing the challenges associated with creating content that appeals to a broad audience, start the paragraph with a topic sentence like "Another aspect worth considering is the difficulty advertisers face when trying to create universally appealing content."

5. Grammar

I concuragree with Mike's perspective that users can simply opt-out of targettargeted advertisements if they have concernconcerns about piracy.privacy. Moreover, I firmly believe that targettargeted advertising does not pose an ethical dilemma, as it offers individuals appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues. To elaborate, proctectingprotecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today's digital age, as internet browsers are designed to be user-friendly. Even those who lack technical expertise can easily locate and adjust necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally. Small businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods. While Jessica raises valid points about the importance of creating catercontent that caters to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenge associated with producing such content.

Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I agree with Mike's viewpoint that users can simply opt-out of targeted advertisements if they have concerns about privacy. Furthermore, I firmly believe that targeted advertising does not present an ethical dilemma, as it provides individuals with appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues.

To elaborate, protecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today's digital age, as internet browsers are designed to be user-friendly. Even those who lack technical expertise can easily locate and adjust necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally. Small businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

While Jessica raises valid points about the importance of creating content that caters to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenge associated with producing such content. (156 words)

Revised essay: Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I concur with Mike’s perspective agree with Mike's viewpoint (Changed "concur" to "agree" for a more conversational tone) that users can simply opt-out of target targeted advertisements (Changed "target" to "targeted" for consistency) if they have concern concerns about piracy. Moreover, privacy (Changed "piracy" to "privacy" as it was likely a typo). Furthermore, I firmly believe that target targeted advertising does not pose present an ethical dilemma, dilemma (Changed "pose" to "present" for better flow), as it offers provides individuals with appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues.

To elaborate, proctecting protecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today’s today's digital age, as internet browsers are designed to be user-friendly. Even those who lack technical expertise can easily locate and adjust necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally. Small businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

While Jessica raises valid points about the importance of creating cater content that caters (Changed "creating cater" to "creating content that caters" for clarity) to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenge associated with producing such content.

Display title: 8 Mind Map


1. Introduction
   - Mike's viewpoint
   - No ethical dilemma

2. Protecting personal data
   - Accessible in digital age
   - User-friendly browsers

3. Diversity in society
   - Difficult to appeal universally

4. Small businesses and targeted advertising
   - Limited budgets
   - Cost-effective methods

5. Jessica's counterargument
   - Broad audience content importance

6. Challenge of broad content creation 

7. Conclusion 

Display title: 9 Key Words

WordPhonetic SymbolPart of SpeechEnglish DefinitionEnglish TranslationSample Sentence
Ethical dilemmaˈɛθɪkəl dɪˈlɛməNounA situation in which a difficult choice has to be made between two courses of actionMoral problemTargeted advertising does not present an ethical dilemma, as it provides individuals with appropriate guidance to circumvent data privacy issues.
User-friendlyˈjuːzər ˈfrɛndliAdjectiveEasy to use or understandEasy-to-useInternet browsers are designed to be user-friendly, allowing people to easily adjust their privacy settings.
DiversedaɪˈvɜrsAdjectiveShowing a great deal of variety; very differentVariedContemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it difficult to create universally appealing content.
Targeted advertisingˈtɑrɡɪtəd ˌædvərˈtaɪzɪŋNounAdvertising that is aimed at a particular group of peopleFocused marketingSmall businesses may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.
Inherent challengeɪnˈhɪrənt ˈʧæləndʒNounA natural or basic difficulty that is a part of somethingFundamental difficultyJessica fails to acknowledge the inherent challenge associated with producing content that caters to a broad audience.
AccessibleəkˈsɛsəblAdjectiveEasy to approach, reach, enter, speak with, or useApproachableProtecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today's digital age.
UniversallyjuːnɪˈvɜrsəliAdverbIn a way that relates to or involves all people or thingsGenerallyIt is nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally due to the diversity in society.
Cost-effective_ kɒst ɪˈfektiv__ Adjective__ Economical in terms of the goods or services received for the money spent; offering good value for money_Good value for money_ Targeted advertising is a cost-effective method for small businesses with limited budgets._
Circumvent_ sɜrkəmˈvɛnt__ Verb__ Find a way around (an obstacle); overcome (a problem) in a clever and surreptitious way _Bypass_ Users can circumvent data privacy issues by opting out of targeted advertisements._

Display title: 6 Revised Essay

I agree with Mike's viewpoint that users can simply opt-out of targeted advertisements if they have concerns about privacy. Furthermore, I firmly believe that targeted advertising does not present an ethical dilemma, as it provides individuals with appropriate and comprehensible guidance to circumvent data privacy issues.

To elaborate, protecting personal data has become increasingly accessible in today's digital age, as internet browsers are designed to be user-friendly. Even those who lack technical expertise can easily locate and adjust necessary settings. Additionally, contemporary society is more diverse than ever before, making it nearly impossible to craft a message that appeals universally. Small businesses with limited advertising and research budgets may struggle to survive if they are barred from utilizing cost-effective targeted advertising methods.

While Jessica raises valid points about the importance of creating content that caters to a broad audience, she fails to acknowledge the inherent challenge associated with producing such content.

Academic Discussion का मूल्यांकन कैसे होता है

TOEFL Academic Discussion task का मूल्यांकन आधिकारिक ETS scoring rubric के आधार पर किया जाता है। AI evaluation हर जवाब का विश्लेषण कई आयामों में करता है।

प्रासंगिकता और योगदान

क्या जवाब प्रश्न को संबोधित करता है और चर्चा में सार्थक योगदान देता है?

भाषा का प्रयोग

व्याकरणिक शुद्धता, शब्दावली की व्यापकता, और वाक्य संरचना की गुणवत्ता।

विकास और समर्थन

क्या विचारों को विशिष्ट उदाहरणों और स्पष्ट तर्क के साथ अच्छी तरह विकसित किया गया है?

जवाबों में सामान्य पैटर्न

इस task के लिए यूज़र सबमिशन के विश्लेषण के आधार पर, यहाँ छात्रों के जवाबों में देखे गए सामान्य पैटर्न दिए गए हैं।

कई छात्र स्पष्ट राय देते हैं लेकिन उनके पास सहायक उदाहरणों की कमी होती है।

मजबूत जवाब सीधे reading passage और अन्य वक्ताओं के दृष्टिकोण का संदर्भ देते हैं।

अधिक अंक पाने वाले जवाब विविध वाक्य संरचनाओं और अकादमिक शब्दावली का उपयोग करते हैं।

समय प्रबंधन एक अहम कारक है — जल्दबाज़ी में लिखे गए जवाबों को विकास (development) में कम अंक मिलते हैं।

सीखने के टिप्स

1

लिखना शुरू करने से पहले prompt को ध्यान से पढ़ें और प्रश्न के सभी हिस्सों को पहचानें।

2

अपने जवाब में reading passage और अन्य छात्रों की राय का संदर्भ दें।

3

अपने मुख्य बिंदु को सपोर्ट करने के लिए विशिष्ट उदाहरणों का उपयोग करें — सामान्य बातें कहने से बचें।

4

120-150 शब्दों का लक्ष्य रखें। लंबे जवाब हमेशा बेहतर नहीं होते; स्पष्टता और फोकस ज़्यादा मायने रखते हैं।

5

एग्ज़ाम की परिस्थितियों में fluency बनाने के लिए समयबद्ध जवाबों (10 मिनट) का अभ्यास करें।

अक्सर पूछे जाने वाले प्रश्न

TOEFL Academic Discussion टास्क क्या है?
TOEFL Academic Discussion टास्क में आपको एक ऑनलाइन क्लासरूम चर्चा में योगदान देना होता है। आप एक प्रोफेसर का प्रश्न और अन्य छात्रों की प्रतिक्रियाएँ पढ़ेंगे, फिर लगभग 10 मिनट में अपनी राय व्यक्त करते हुए और उसका समर्थन करते हुए अपनी खुद की पोस्ट लिखेंगे।
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इस पेज पर मौजूद यूज़र सैंपल क्या हैं?
ये उन TOEFL परीक्षार्थियों द्वारा सबमिट किए गए वास्तविक उत्तर हैं जिन्होंने LingoLeap पर इस प्रश्न का अभ्यास किया है। प्रत्येक सैंपल का मूल्यांकन हमारे AI स्कोरिंग इंजन द्वारा किया गया है, जो स्कोर के साथ-साथ ताकत और सुधार के क्षेत्रों पर विस्तृत फीडबैक प्रदान करता है।
AI मूल्यांकन कितना सटीक है?
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