TOEFL TPO 17 Speaking Task 4 Sample: Using points and examples from the talk, explain the concept of diffusion.

1.子项得分

• Delivery: 3

• Language Use: 3

• Topic Development: 3

2.预估分数

• Estimated Score: 23

3.表达 回答中的发音大部分清晰，语速适中，但偶尔有些停顿。为了提高发音的准确性，请注意一些单词的发音，例如“philosophy”和“medicine”。此外，尽量减少不必要的停顿，让语言更流畅。

4.话题发展 The response provides a coherent and well-organized explanation of the concept of diffusion, using two examples from the lecture. However, to improve topic development, try to provide more details from the lecture, such as mentioning how diffusion can occur through various ways like military conquest, tourism, or satellite TV shows. Also, emphasize the selectiveness of diffusion and how cultures resist ideas that seem too foreign or different from their own beliefs and values.

5.语言使用

Original Answer: The lecture gives two examples to illustrate a concept called diffusion, which means the culture spread from one group to another group. The first example is an everyday newspaper. In the United States, the letters were English, but the words were borrowed from other cultures centuries ago. The printing of the word was invented in Germany and the paper was from China. So the diffusion will take a long time and distance. The second example is acupuncture, which is from Chinese medicine. Many United States people realize it is effective to relieve pain, but they do not accept the philosophy behind it. As a result, acupuncture is absorbed in United States culture, but the philosophy of Chinese medicine doesn't.

Corrected Answer: The lecture gives two examples to illustrate a concept called diffusioncultural diffusion, which means the culture spreadthe spreading of culture from one group to another group. The first example is an everyday newspapera modern newspaper. In the United States, the letters are English, but the words were borrowed from other cultures centuries ago. The printing of the wordwords was invented in Germany and the paper was from Chinainvented in China. So, diffusion can take a long time and cover great distances. The second example is acupuncture, which originates from Chinese medicine. Many people in the United States realize it is effective for relieving pain, but they do not fully embrace the philosophy behind it. As a result, acupuncture has been integrated into American culture, but the underlying principles of Chinese medicine have not.

(原文中的“diffusion”应改为“cultural diffusion”，以更准确地描述这个概念。另外，“the culture spread”应改为“the spreading of culture”，使语句更自然。此外，将“an everyday newspaper”改为“a modern newspaper”，以便更好地反映讲座中的内容。还有，将“the word”改为“words”，使表达更准确。最后，将“United States people”改为“people in the United States”，使语句更自然。)

Revised Answer (140 words): The lecture discusses cultural diffusion, which refers to the spreading of culture from one group to another. The first example provided is a modern newspaper. In the United States, although the letters are English, the words were borrowed from other cultures centuries ago. The printing process was invented in Germany, and paper was invented in China. This demonstrates that diffusion can take a long time and cover great distances. The second example is acupuncture, originating from Chinese medicine. Many people in the United States acknowledge its effectiveness for relieving pain but do not fully embrace the underlying philosophy. Consequently, acupuncture has been integrated into American culture, while the principles of Chinese medicine remain less accepted. These examples illustrate how cultural diffusion occurs and how societies selectively adopt aspects of other cultures.

6.思维导图

• Cultural Diffusion
  • Definition
  • Example 1: Modern Newspaper
    • Letters: English
    • Words: Borrowed from other cultures
    • Printing: Invented in Germany
    • Paper: Invented in China
  • Example 2: Acupuncture
    • Origin: Chinese medicine
    • Effectiveness: Pain relief
    • Acceptance: Integrated into American culture
    • Philosophy: Less accepted

7.关键词

1.子项得分

• 交付：2

• 语言使用：2

• 话题发展：2

2.预估分数

• 总分：19

3.表达 在交付方面，发言者的语速较快，有时会出现不必要的停顿。建议发言者尝试放慢语速，并注意在适当的地方停顿，以提高表达的清晰度。此外，发言者在发音方面也存在一些不准确之处，需要加强发音练习。

4.话题发展 在话题发展方面，发言者对扩散概念的解释较为简单。建议发言者在解释扩散概念时，更详细地阐述其特点和过程，并使用听力材料中的例子进行支持。例如，在谈论报纸的例子时，可以提到字母、印刷技术和纸张是如何从不同文化传播到美国的；在谈论针灸的例子时，可以强调美国人接受了针灸这种治疗方法，但没有完全理解和接受背后的中医哲学。通过这样的举例和解释，可以使回答更加充实和有说服力。

5.语言使用

原文：In the lecture, the concept of diffusion is a process, such as a type of food is separated from one group to another group. In the lecture, diffusion is described as a process where cultural items, like a type of food, are spread from one group to another.（将句子结构进行了调整，使其更自然流畅。）

There are two characteristics of diffusion. Diffusion has two main characteristics.（使用了更自然的表达方式。）

The first is that it can occur through a variety of ways. Firstly, it can occur through various means.（调整了句子结构和词汇，使其更自然。）

Take the modern newspaper in the US as an example, the printing of the walls. For example, consider the modern newspaper in the US; the printing process was invented in Germany.（纠正了原文中的错误，并调整了句子结构。）

This process came from Germany. And finally, the paper itself was invented in China. Additionally, paper was invented in China.（合并了两个句子，并进行了简化。）

And the second characteristic is that it is not easy, but the happening of the diffusion. The second characteristic is that diffusion does not always happen easily or completely.（调整了句子结构，使其更自然。）

And take the Chinese treatment in the US as an example, the treatment can be effective in treating some diseases in the US. For instance, consider acupuncture, a Chinese treatment popular in the US that can be effective for certain conditions.（调整了句子结构，使其更自然。）

Many US people like it, but they can't understand the philosophy, which is under the treatment. Many Americans appreciate its effectiveness but may not fully understand or adopt the underlying philosophy of Chinese medicine.（调整了句子结构和词汇，使其更自然。）

修订版（140字）：

In the lecture, diffusion is described as a process where cultural items, like a type of food, are spread from one group to another. Diffusion has two main characteristics. Firstly, it can occur through various means. For example, consider the modern newspaper in the US; the printing process was invented in Germany. Additionally, paper was invented in China. The second characteristic is that diffusion does not always happen easily or completely. For instance, consider acupuncture, a Chinese treatment popular in the US that can be effective for certain conditions. Many Americans appreciate its effectiveness but may not fully understand or adopt the underlying philosophy of Chinese medicine.

6.思维导图

- Diffusion
  - Definition
    - Process of spreading cultural items
  - Characteristics
    - Various means
      - Example: Modern newspaper in the US
        - Printing process from Germany
        - Paper from China
    - Not always easy or complete
      - Example: Acupuncture in the US
        - Effective treatment
        - Limited understanding of underlying philosophy

7.关键词

1.Sub Scores

• Delivery: 3

• Language Use: 3

• Topic Development: 3

2.Estimated Scores

• Total Score: 23

3.Delivery The speaker's delivery is generally clear and fluid, with a consistent pace and only occasional pauses. However, there are some areas where the speech could be improved. For example, the speaker should work on using more natural transitions between ideas and avoiding repetition of certain phrases. Additionally, the speaker should focus on pronouncing certain words more accurately to avoid confusion.

4.Topic Development The response is coherent and well-organized, with clear connections between ideas and sufficient support or examples from the talk. However, there is room for improvement in terms of topic development. The speaker could provide more specific details from the talk to further illustrate the concept of diffusion. Additionally, the speaker should work on making their examples more relevant to the main idea of diffusion and avoid discussing unrelated aspects of the topic. Overall, focusing on these improvements will help create a stronger response that better addresses the question.

5.Language Use

Original: Diffusion is the concept that cultural products spreading spread (corrected verb tense) from one group to another, which can be accomplished by several ways, such as military, conqueror, or tourist. Let's take modern newspaper in the United States as an example. All of its elements come from different areas. Specifically, the character is borrowed from centuries ago, the printing technology was invented by Germany, and the paper originated in China. However, incorporating such many cultures are not easy, and its diffusion is very selective. For example, in the States, people are used to get acupuncture because they realize that it's very effective. However, they cannot understand the philosophy behind it, which is Chinese medicine, due to its remote cultural background.

Revised (140 words): Diffusion refers to the process of cultural elements spreading from one group to another through various means such as military conquests, tourism, or media influences. A prime example of diffusion is the modern newspaper in the United States. Its components have origins in different cultures: characters were borrowed from ancient scripts, printing technology was invented in Germany, and paper was first created in China. The process of incorporating multiple cultures can be challenging and selective. In the US, people have embraced acupuncture for its effectiveness but often struggle to comprehend the underlying philosophy of Chinese medicine due to significant cultural differences.

Suggestions for improvement include using more advanced vocabulary and ensuring proper grammar usage throughout the response. Additionally, focus on creating smooth transitions between ideas and providing a strong conclusion to enhance the overall flow of statements.

6.Mind Map

• Diffusion
  • Process
  • Cultural elements
  • Means of spreading
    • Military conquests
    • Tourism
    • Media influences
  • Example: Modern newspaper in the US
    • Characters: Ancient scripts
    • Printing technology: Germany
    • Paper: China
  • Challenges and selectivity

7.Key Words