TOEFL TPO -1 Writing Task 2 Sample: do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Sports and social activities should have equal financial support as academic classes and libraries in universities and colleges.

1.子项得分

• 任务完成度：3

• 文章结构与组织：3

• 连贯性与衔接：3

• 语言运用：2

2.预估分数

• 总分：20

3.任务完成度 您的文章基本上回答了题目，但是需要更深入地探讨主题。建议您提供更多具体的例子和详细的解释来支持您的观点。此外，尝试使用更多种类的句式和词汇来丰富文章。

示例1： 原文：“With the finical support, our library had invited the Economy Noble prize owner John to gave us a letter.” 修改后：“With financial support, our university was able to invite Nobel Prize-winning economist John Smith to give a lecture on economic development.”

示例2： 原文：“However，the cost of these activities should be lower than universities, because of low frequency.” 修改后：“However, the cost of sports and social activities should be lower than that of academic classes and libraries because students spend less time participating in these activities compared to studying.”

4.文章结构与组织 文章的结构需要改进。建议您在引言部分明确表达自己的观点，并在正文中为每个观点单独安排一个段落。同时，确保每个段落都有明确的主题句和相关的支持细节。最后，在结论部分总结您的论点。

示例1： 原文：“With the decrease of global economy, the universities have reduced the cost.” 修改后：“Due to the global economic downturn, universities are facing budget cuts and need to prioritize their spending. I believe that academic classes and libraries should receive more financial support than sports and social activities.”

示例2： 原文：“Admittedly, exercise and activities are crucial parts pf universities.” 修改后：“While it is true that sports and social activities play an important role in university life, they should not be prioritized over academic resources such as classes and libraries.”

5. 语法批改

With the decrease of global economy, the universities have reduced the cost. Leaders (Two consecutive spaces)are talking about how to distribute funding in an appropriate wayappropriately(Wordiness: in a ... manner). Some argue that (Two consecutive spaces)fund should be used in class, sports and library. whileWhile(Checks that a sentence starts with an uppercase letter), I believe that class and library should have priority, especially considering the factors of updating the facilities.

Firstly, the responsibility of the university is teaching. Libraries and class roomsclassrooms(bed room (bedroom)) are symbols of knowledge, improve the support will be beneficial to their scholarship. For example, with the finical support, our library had invited the Economy Noble prizeNobel Prize(price (prize)) owner John to gave us a letter. After his wonderful speech, many students decided to (Two consecutive spaces)learn economy. Under his enthusiasm, (Two consecutive spaces)many people are exploring some interesting areas which is beneficial for economy field.

Second, updating facilities will cost money. When the budget could be used in updating the libraries and classrooms ,,(Use of whitespace before comma and before/after parentheses) they can offer better services. Take my classmate as andan(Detects potentially wrong usage of "and") example, he downloaded a data paper from library websites when he prepared a paper. Some argue that these data papers cost a lot of money. However, he claimed it reduced lota lot(This rule identifies whether the article 'a' is missing in a sentence.) of time. Without thesesthese(theses (these)) data papers, he couldn’t finish the paper. Besides, our teaching builds are urge to be repaired. Admittedly, compared with others, this should have priority. In conclusion, I believe more money should be cost in libraries and classrooms updating.

Admittedly, exercise and activities are crucial parts pf universities. I totally agree that (Two consecutive spaces)students should attend these activities to keep up their’stheirs(their's (theirs)) physical and emotional health. However，the[No Replacement Word Found](misspelling) cost of these activities should be lower than universities, because of low frequency. The students always spend more time on doing homework in classrooms and libraries, while they just spend several hours on doing sports.

In conclusion, we have to admit that although doing exercise and activities are important to students, universities are the place which used for study. So, universities should be prioritized in terms of these.

6.文章修订

Due to the global economic downturn, universities are facing budget cuts and need to prioritize their spending. I believe that academic classes and libraries should receive more financial support than sports and social activities, as they are essential for fulfilling the primary purpose of universities: education.

Firstly, the primary responsibility of a university is to provide quality education. Libraries and classrooms are symbols of knowledge, and improving their support will be beneficial to students' scholarship. For instance, with financial support, our university was able to invite Nobel Prize-winning economist John Smith to give a lecture on economic development. After his insightful speech, many students were inspired to study economics. Under his guidance, numerous individuals have explored interesting areas in the field of economics, contributing significantly to its advancement.

Secondly, updating facilities requires substantial funding. Allocating budgets for upgrading libraries and classrooms will enable them to offer better services. Take my classmate as an example; he downloaded a research paper from the library website while preparing for an assignment. Although some argue that these research papers can be expensive, he claimed that it saved him a significant amount of time. Without access to these resources, he would not have been able to complete his assignment efficiently. Moreover, our teaching buildings are in dire need of repair; compared with other aspects of university life, this should take precedence.

Admittedly, sports and social activities play an important role in university life; they contribute significantly to students' physical and emotional well-being. However, the cost of these activities should be lower than that of academic classes and libraries because students spend less time participating in them compared to studying.

In addition to prioritizing funding for academic resources over sports and social activities, universities could also explore alternative sources of funding for these non-academic pursuits. For example, they could collaborate with local businesses or seek sponsorships from alumni who value the importance of extracurricular activities in shaping well-rounded individuals.

In conclusion, while sports and social activities are essential aspects of university life, they should not be prioritized over academic resources such as classes and libraries. Universities must allocate their limited financial resources wisely to ensure that their primary mission—providing quality education—is not compromised. By investing more in academic facilities and seeking alternative funding for extracurricular activities, universities can strike a balance between academics and other aspects of student life, ultimately benefiting all stakeholders involved.

Essay statistics: {"words": 451, "unique_words": 234} (405 words)

With the decrease of 7.文章批改

Due to the global economy, the economic downturn, universities have reduced the cost. Leaders are talking about how to distribute funding in an appropriate way. Some argue that fund should be used in class, sports and library. while, facing budget cuts and need to prioritize their spending. (Revised for clarity and formality) I believe that class and library academic classes and libraries should have priority, especially considering the factors of updating the facilities. receive more financial support than sports and social activities, as they are essential for fulfilling the primary purpose of universities: education. (Revised for clarity)

Firstly, the primary responsibility of the a university is teaching. to provide quality education. (Revised for clarity) Libraries and class rooms classrooms are symbols of knowledge, improve the and improving their support will be beneficial to their students' scholarship. (Revised for coherence) For example, instance, with the finical financial support, our library had invited the Economy Noble prize owner university was able to invite Nobel Prize-winning economist John to gave us Smith to give a letter. lecture on economic development. (Corrected grammar and added details) After his wonderful insightful speech, many students decided to learn economy. were inspired to study economics. Under his enthusiasm, many people are exploring some guidance, numerous individuals have explored interesting areas which is beneficial for economy field. ¶ Second, in the field of economics, contributing significantly to its advancement. (Revised for coherence)

Secondly, updating facilities requires substantial funding. Allocating budgets for upgrading libraries and classrooms will cost money. When the budget could be used in updating the libraries and classrooms , they can enable them to offer better services. (Revised for clarity) Take my classmate as and example, an example; he downloaded a data research paper from the library websites when he prepared a paper. Some website while preparing for an assignment. Although some argue that these data research papers cost a lot of money. However, can be expensive, he claimed that it reduced lot saved him a significant amount of time. Without theses data papers, access to these resources, he couldn’t finish the paper. Besides, would not have been able to complete his assignment efficiently. (Corrected grammar and added details) Moreover, our teaching builds buildings are urge to be repaired. Admittedly, in dire need of repair; compared with others, other aspects of university life, this should have priority. In conclusion, I believe more money should be cost in libraries and classrooms updating. take precedence. (Revised for coherence)

Admittedly, exercise and sports and social activities are crucial parts pf universities. I totally agree that students should attend these activities to keep up their’s play an important role in university life; they contribute significantly to students' physical and emotional health. However，the well-being. However, the cost of these activities should be lower than universities, that of academic classes and libraries because of low frequency. The students always spend more less time on doing homework in classrooms and libraries, while participating in them compared to studying. (Revised for clarity and coherence)

In addition to prioritizing funding for academic resources over sports and social activities, universities could also explore alternative sources of funding for these non-academic pursuits. For example, they just spend several hours on doing sports. could collaborate with local businesses or seek sponsorships from alumni who value the importance of extracurricular activities in shaping well-rounded individuals. (Added details)

In conclusion, we have to admit that although doing exercise and while sports and social activities are important to students, universities are the place which used for study. So, universities essential aspects of university life, they should not be prioritized in terms of these.over academic resources such as classes and libraries. Universities must allocate their limited financial resources wisely to ensure that their primary mission—providing quality education—is not compromised. By investing more in academic facilities and seeking alternative funding for extracurricular activities, universities can strike a balance between academics and other aspects of student life, ultimately benefiting all stakeholders involved. (Revised for clarity and coherence)

8.思维导图

• Thesis statement: Prioritize funding for academic classes and libraries over sports and social activities.
  • Topic sentence 1: Primary responsibility of universities is education.
    • Sub-topic: Libraries and classrooms as symbols of knowledge.
      • Supporting example: Nobel Prize-winning economist's lecture.
  • Topic sentence 2: Updating facilities requires substantial funding.
    • Sub-topic: Better services with upgraded libraries and classrooms.
      • Supporting example: Classmate's use of research paper from library website.
  • Topic sentence 3: Sports and social activities are important but less prioritized.
    • Sub-topic: Cost should be lower than academic resources due to less time spent on them.
  • Topic sentence 4: Alternative sources of funding for non-academic pursuits.
    • Sub-topic: Collaboration with local businesses or seeking sponsorships from alumni.
  • Conclusion: Balance between academics and other aspects of student life.

9.关键词

10.补充示例

1. Universities with well-funded libraries often have access to a wide range of academic journals, allowing students to stay up-to-date with the latest research in their fields.

2. Upgraded classrooms with modern technology, such as smartboards and high-speed internet, can enhance the learning experience for students and improve their overall academic performance.

3. By allocating more funds to academic resources, universities can attract top-notch professors and researchers, thereby raising the institution's reputation and ranking.

4. Investing in library resources can also benefit remote learners who rely on digital materials for their studies, ensuring that they receive the same quality education as on-campus students.

5. A well-funded library can offer extended hours of operation, providing students with a quiet and comfortable space to study during evenings and weekends when they may not have access to classrooms.