TOEFL TPO 9 Speaking Task 1 Sample: Some people think that family members are the most important influence on young adults. Others believe that friends are the most important influence. Which do you agree with? Explain why.

1. Sub Scores

• Delivery: 3

• Topic Development: 3

• Language Use: 2

2. Estimated Scores

• Total Score: 23

3. Delivery The speaker's speech is relatively clear and fluid, with a consistent pace and only occasional pauses. However, there are some areas where the speech could be improved. The speaker should work on their pronunciation to avoid any confusion or misunderstandings. Additionally, they should practice using appropriate pauses to improve the overall flow of their speech.

4. Topic Development The speaker provides a coherent and well-organized response, with clear connections between ideas and sufficient support for their opinion. However, the response could be improved by providing more specific examples or personal experiences to further support their argument. Additionally, the speaker could explore the topic more deeply by discussing the various ways family members can influence young adults and comparing that to the influence of friends. This would create a more comprehensive and persuasive response.

5. Grammar

In my opinion, family members are the most influential people on the young adults because they've lived together for like over 10 or 20 years and they know each other very well. But for friends, they might, if they relocate from aone place to another new place, the friends might change over time, so they might not have that deep interaction as family membersmembers, and this leads to less influence on them.

5. Language Use

Original:

In my opinion, family members are the most influential people on the young adults because they've lived together for like over 10 or 20 years and they know each other very well. But for friends, they might, if they relocate from a place to another new place, the friends might change over time, so they might not have that deep interaction as family members and this leads to less influence on them.

Revised:

In my opinion, family members have the most significant influence on young adults. This is primarily because they have lived together for an extended period, often over 10 or 20 years, and have developed a deep understanding of each other. One supporting example is that family members are present during crucial developmental stages, shaping the young adult's values and beliefs. In contrast, friends may change over time, especially if a person relocates to a new place. This can result in less profound interactions and a weaker influence on the individual's life choices. Another example is that family members often provide emotional and financial support, which can directly impact a young adult's decisions and future opportunities. Overall, the enduring relationships and support from family members make them the most important influence on young adults.

In my opinion, family members have the most significant influence on young adults (revised for clarity). This is primarily because they have lived together for an extended period (revised for better flow), often over 10 or 20 years (revised for emphasis), and have developed a deep understanding of each other (revised for better flow). One supporting example is that family members are present during crucial developmental stages (added to strengthen argument), shaping the young adult's values and beliefs (added to explain the reason). In contrast, friends may change over time (revised for better flow), especially if a person relocates to a new place (added to provide context). This can result in less profound interactions and a weaker influence on the individual's life choices (revised for clarity). Another example is that family members often provide emotional and financial support (added to strengthen argument), which can directly impact a young adult's decisions and future opportunities (added to explain the reason). Overall, the enduring relationships and support from family members make them the most important influence on young adults (strong conclusion added).

Corrected:

In my opinion, family members are have the most influential people significant influence on the young adults (revised for clarity). This is primarily because they've they have lived together for like an extended period (revised for better flow), often over 10 or 20 years and they know (revised for emphasis), and have developed a deep understanding of each other very well. But for friends, they might, if they relocate from a place to another new place, the (revised for better flow). One supporting example is that family members are present during crucial developmental stages (added to strengthen argument), shaping the young adult's values and beliefs (added to explain the reason). In contrast, friends might may change over time, so they might not have that deep interaction as family members and this leads to time (revised for better flow), especially if a person relocates to a new place (added to provide context). This can result in less profound interactions and a weaker influence on them.the individual's life choices (revised for clarity). Another example is that family members often provide emotional and financial support (added to strengthen argument), which can directly impact a young adult's decisions and future opportunities (added to explain the reason). Overall, the enduring relationships and support from family members make them the most important influence on young adults (strong conclusion added).

7. Display title: 7.Mind Map

- Preference or Opinion
  - Family members are more influential on young adults

- Main Point
  - Family members have deeper connections and understanding

- Supporting Examples
  - Living together for over 10 or 20 years
  - Friends might change over time due to relocation

- Conclusion
  - Family members have a stronger influence on young adults than friends

8. Display title: 8.Key Words