TOEFL TPO 38 Writing Task 1 Sample: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on the specific methods proposed in the reading passage.

1.Sub Scores

• Task fulfillment: 4

• Organization: 4

• Coherence and Cohesion: 4

• Language Use: 3

2.Estimated Scores

• Estimated Score: 25

3.Task completeness The essay does a good job of summarizing the points made in the lecture and explaining how they cast doubt on the specific methods proposed in the reading passage. However, there is room for improvement in terms of language use and clarity. To improve task fulfillment, consider using more precise language to describe the points made in the lecture and avoid repeating phrases from the reading passage.

Example 1: Original: "The professor contradicted this idea by offering the fact that there are other kinds of spores spreading like water-assisted spreading." Improved: "The professor challenged this idea by explaining that spores can also spread through water, making it difficult to control their dissemination."

Example 2: Original: "However, the professor pointed out that this kind of chemicals can only protect them for several months." Improved: "However, the professor noted that these fungicides provide protection for only a few months, necessitating frequent reapplication."

4.Essay structure and organization The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing each method discussed in the lecture, and a conclusion. However, transitions between ideas could be improved to enhance coherence and cohesion. Additionally, consider using topic sentences at the beginning of each body paragraph to clearly state what will be discussed.

Example 1: Original: "Firstly, we can stop..." Improved: "Firstly, while the reading suggests stopping P. ramorum spores from spreading as an effective method..."

Example 2: Original: "Secondly, there are some kinds..." Improved: "Secondly, although fungicides are mentioned as a potential solution in the reading passage..."

5. Grammar

A fungus called Phytophthora[No Replacement Word Found](misspelling) ramorumfamous(misspelling) can infect trees and cause serious damage to oak trees. Many infected oak trees died of Phytophthora[No Replacement Word Found](misspelling) ramorumfamous(misspelling). The fungus was a threat to the forests in the Western United States. The passage listed some possible methods to address this problem. However, the professor in the discussion offered an opposite opinion that all these methods are ineffective and not practical. Firstly, we can stop the P. ramorumfamous(misspelling) spores from spreading to control the reproduction of the fungus. By suggesting hikers to wash their shoes and installing new bike scrubbers, we can prevent the human-assisted spreading. The professor contradicted this idea by offering the fact that there are other kinds of spores spreadingspreading,(This rule identifies whether commas are missing in a sentence.) like water-assisted spreading. The rainfall can carry the spores a long distance. This kind of spreading is hard to control. Secondly, there are some kinds of fungus-fighting chemicals that can help oak trees to defend against the P. ramorumfamous(misspelling) fungus, which can reduce the probability of infection. However, the professor pointed out that this kind of chemicals can only protect them for several months. Therefore, in order to protect the oak trees, we have to inject these chemical every few months to every single tree in the forest, which can be very expensive. Lastly, the passage introduced a method that is called clear-cuttingcutting,(This rule identifies whether commas are missing in a sentence.) which refers to cutting and burning all the infected trees and the trees around themthe surrounding trees(the noun around it (surrounding noun)) to prevent the spreading fungus. However, the professor mentioned that there are some tree species that are too rare to cut down. Besides, the damage of cutting down trees is much more heavierheavier(No 'more' or 'most' before comparatives) than the damage ofdamage to(Collocation: damage of/to) fungus.

Section Title: 6. Revised Essay

A fungus called Phytophthora ramorum can infect trees and cause serious damage to oak trees. Many infected oak trees die due to this fungus, posing a threat to the forests in the Western United States. The passage proposes several methods to address this problem; however, the professor in the lecture casts doubt on their effectiveness and practicality.

Firstly, the passage suggests that stopping P. ramorum spores from spreading could control the reproduction of the fungus. Encouraging hikers to wash their shoes and installing new bike scrubbers could prevent human-assisted spreading. However, the professor counters this idea by explaining that other types of spore dispersal exist, such as water-assisted spreading. Rainfall can carry spores long distances, making this form of dispersal difficult to control.

Secondly, the passage mentions fungicidal chemicals that can help oak trees defend against P. ramorum infection by reducing its likelihood. The professor, however, points out that these chemicals only provide protection for several months. Consequently, protecting oak trees would require injecting these chemicals into every single tree in the forest every few months—an impractical and costly endeavor.

Lastly, clear-cutting is introduced as a method involving cutting and burning all infected trees and surrounding vegetation to prevent fungal spread. The professor argues that this approach is problematic because some tree species are too rare to cut down indiscriminately. Furthermore, he contends that clear-cutting's ecological damage outweighs the harm caused by P. ramorum infection.

In light of these arguments presented by the professor in the lecture, it becomes evident that the methods proposed in the passage may not be as effective or practical as initially suggested for combating P. ramorum's impact on forests in Western United States. (283 words)

A fungus called Phytophthora ramorum can infect trees and cause serious damage to oak trees. Many infected oak trees died of Phytophthora ramorum. The fungus was die (revised for verb tense consistency) due to this fungus, posing a threat to the forests in the Western United States. The passage listed some possible proposes several methods to address this problem. However, problem; however, the professor in the discussion offered an opposite opinion that all these methods are ineffective and not practical. lecture casts doubt on their effectiveness and practicality (revised for clarity and conciseness).

Firstly, we can stop the the passage suggests that stopping P. ramorum spores from spreading to could control the reproduction of the fungus. By suggesting Encouraging hikers to wash their shoes and installing new bike scrubbers, we can scrubbers could prevent the human-assisted spreading. ¶ The However, the professor contradicted counters this idea by offering the fact that there are explaining (revised for clarity) that other kinds types of spores spreading like spore dispersal exist, such as water-assisted spreading. The rainfall Rainfall can carry the spores a long distance. This kind distances, making this form of spreading is hard dispersal difficult to control.

Secondly, there are some kinds of fungus-fighting the passage mentions fungicidal chemicals that can help oak trees to defend against the P. ramorum fungus, which can reduce the probability of infection. However, the professor pointed infection by reducing its likelihood (revised for clarity). The professor, however, points out that this kind of these chemicals can only protect them provide protection for several months. Therefore, in order to protect the Consequently, protecting oak trees, we have to inject trees would require injecting these chemical every few months to chemicals into every single tree in the forest, which can be very expensive. forest every few months—an impractical and costly endeavor (revised for clarity).

Lastly, the passage clear-cutting is introduced as a method that is called clear-cutting which refers to involving cutting and burning all the infected trees and the trees around them surrounding vegetation to prevent the spreading fungus. However, the fungal spread (revised for clarity). The professor mentioned that there are argues that this approach is problematic because some tree species that are too rare to cut down. Besides, the down indiscriminately (revised for conciseness). Furthermore, he contends that clear-cutting's ecological damage outweighs the harm caused by P. ramorum infection.

In light of cutting down trees is much more heavier than the damage of fungus.these arguments presented by the professor in the lecture, it becomes evident that the methods proposed in the passage may not be as effective or practical as initially suggested for combating P. ramorum's impact on forests in Western United States (revised for clarity and conciseness).

8. Mind Map

1. Introduction
   - Phytophthora ramorum
   - Threat to oak trees
   - Passage's proposed methods
   - Professor's doubts

2. Stopping spore dispersal
   - Hikers washing shoes
   - Bike scrubbers
   - Professor's counter: water-assisted spreading

3. Fungicidal chemicals
   - Reducing infection likelihood
   - Professor's counter: short-term protection, impracticality, cost

4. Clear-cutting method
   - Cutting and burning infected trees and vegetation
   - Professor's counter: rare tree species, ecological damage

5. Conclusion
   - Ineffectiveness and impracticality of proposed methods

9. Key Words