TOEFL TPO -1 Speaking Task 1 Sample: A university plans to offer several new students a $5000 scholarship. Some people believe the scholarships should go to students with the highest academic performance. Others believe that students with the greatest financial need should receive the scholarships. Which do you agree with and why? Be sure to include details and examples to support your opinion.

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A university plans to offer several new students a $5000 scholarship. Some people believe the scholarships should go to students with the highest academic performance. Others believe that students with the greatest financial need should receive the scholarships. Which do you agree with and why? Be sure to include details and examples to support your opinion.

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1.子项得分

交付 (Delivery): 2
话题发展 (Topic Development): 2
语言使用 (Language Use): 2

2.预估分数

总分: 19

3.表达在交付方面，发言者的语速较快，有时会出现停顿。建议发言者在练习时注意语速和停顿，以便更清晰地表达观点。此外，发言者需要注意正确的发音，以避免拼写错误。

4.话题发展在话题发展方面，发言者提供了一个观点，并给出了一个例子。然而，回答内容较简短，缺乏详细的解释和论证。建议发言者在回答问题时尝试提供更多相关的细节和例子，以便更充分地支持自己的观点。同时，注意保持回答内容的连贯性和组织性。

5. 语言使用

Original:

I agree that students with the greatest financial needs should receive their scholarships. This is because those who are in financial burdens are desperate for money. For instance, back in sophomore year, I was in financial burden at that time. I have to do the part-time job after a whole day study, which is really tired at that time and I don't have enough time to study. If I got a scholarship at that time, I may have more time on studying and better preparing in the examination. That's all.

Revised:

I firmly believe that students with the greatest financial needs should be granted the scholarships. Allocating these funds to those in dire financial situations can significantly alleviate their burdens and allow them to focus on their academic pursuits. For example, during my sophomore year, I experienced severe financial constraints. Consequently, I had to work part-time after a full day of studying, which left me exhausted and unable to allocate sufficient time for my academic preparation. Had I received a scholarship at that time, it would have enabled me to devote more time to my studies and better prepare for examinations. In conclusion, prioritizing financial needs in scholarship distribution can greatly impact students' academic performance and overall well-being.

I firmly believe that students with the greatest financial needs should be granted the scholarships (revised for a stronger statement). Allocating these funds to those in dire financial situations (advanced vocabulary) can significantly alleviate their burdens and allow them to focus on their academic pursuits (natural flow of statements). For example, during my sophomore year, I experienced severe financial constraints (proper grammar). Consequently, I had to work part-time after a full day of studying, which left me exhausted and unable to allocate sufficient time for my academic preparation (smooth transition). Had I received a scholarship at that time, it would have enabled me to devote more time to my studies and better prepare for examinations (strong supporting example). In conclusion, prioritizing financial needs in scholarship distribution can greatly impact students' academic performance and overall well-being (strong conclusion).

Corrected:

I ~~agree~~ firmly believe that students with the greatest financial needs should ~~receive~~ be granted the scholarships (revised for a stronger statement). Allocating these funds to those in dire financial situations (advanced vocabulary) can significantly alleviate their ~~scholarships. This is because those who are in financial~~ burdens ~~are desperate for money.~~ and allow them to focus on their academic pursuits (natural flow of statements). For ~~instance, back in~~ example, during my sophomore year, I ~~was in~~ experienced severe financial ~~burden at that time.~~ constraints (proper grammar). Consequently, I ~~have~~ had to ~~do the~~ work part-time ~~job~~ after a ~~whole~~ full day ~~study,~~ of studying, which ~~is really tired at that~~ left me exhausted and unable to allocate sufficient time ~~and~~ for my academic preparation (smooth transition). Had I ~~don't have enough time to study. If I got~~ received a scholarship at that time, ~~I may~~ it would have enabled me to devote more time ~~on studying~~ to my studies and better ~~preparing~~ prepare for examinations (strong supporting example). In conclusion, prioritizing financial needs in ~~the examination. That's all.~~scholarship distribution can greatly impact students' academic performance and overall well-being (strong conclusion).

思维导图


- Preference or Opinion
  - Financial needs should determine scholarship recipients

- Main Point
  - Students with greatest financial needs are desperate for money

- Supporting Examples
  - Personal experience: part-time job during sophomore year
  - Impact on studies: lack of time for preparation and exhaustion

- Conclusion
  - Scholarships would provide more time for studying and better exam preparation

关键词

Word	Phonetic Symbols	Parts of Speech	English Definition	Simplified Chinese Translation	Sample Sentence
Desperate	/ˈdɛspərət/	Adjective	Feeling or showing a hopeless sense	绝望的	Many students are desperate for financial aid to continue their education.
Burden	/ˈbɜːrdn/	Noun	A heavy load, especially a mental one	负担	The financial burden on students can affect their academic performance.
Exhaustion	/ɪɡˈzɔːstʃən/	Noun	Extreme tiredness	疲惫	Working part-time after a full day of studying led to exhaustion and poor exam preparation.
Scholarship	/ˈskɒlərʃɪp/	Noun	A grant or payment made to support a student's education, awarded on the basis of academic achievement.	奖学金	Receiving a scholarship allowed me to focus more on my studies without worrying about finances.
Preparation	/ˌprɛpəˈreɪʃn/	Noun	The action of making something ready for use or consideration.	准备	With more time for preparation, I could have performed better in my exams.

补充示例
Sub-opinion: Scholarships can reduce stress levels. Explanation: Financially struggling students often face high stress. Supporting Example: A friend who received a scholarship experienced a significant decrease in stress and improved mental health.
Sub-opinion: Scholarships can improve academic performance. Explanation: Students with financial needs can focus more on their studies without worrying about money. Supporting Example: A study showed that students who received scholarships had higher GPAs than those who did not.
Sub-opinion: Scholarships can increase graduation rates. Explanation: Financial support helps students complete their education without dropping out due to financial issues. Supporting Example: Universities with higher scholarship funding have higher graduation rates.
Sub-opinion: Scholarships can promote social mobility. Explanation: Financial aid enables students from low-income families to access higher education and improve their future prospects. Supporting Example: Many successful professionals attribute their achievements to receiving scholarships during their studies.
Sub-opinion: Scholarships can encourage community involvement. Explanation: Students who receive scholarships may feel motivated to give back to their communities. Supporting Example: Scholarship recipients often participate in volunteer work and community service projects, contributing to society's overall well-being.