TOEFL TPO 13 Writing Task 1 Sample: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they oppose the specific points made in the reading passage.

1.子项得分 Task fulfillment: 4 Organization: 3 Coherence and Cohesion: 3 Language Use: 3

2.预估分数

22. 3.任务完成度

整体来说，你的文章回答了题目要求的问题，但在某些方面还有改进的空间。首先，在引述听力内容时，应更加详细地解释听力中提到的观点，并强调它们是如何反驳阅读材料中的论点的。此外，在语言使用方面，尽量避免重复单词和表达，以增加文章的多样性。

示例1： 原文：On the other hand, the professor refutes that it is more likely to make the fossils more exposures to the public because the business make lots of fossils available for sale, which allows schools and museums to buy them. 改进：On the other hand, the professor argues that commercial fossil trade actually increases public exposure to fossils because it makes a large number of fossils available for purchase, enabling institutions like schools and museums to acquire and display them.

示例2： 原文：With out no doubt, scientists will not miss these great chance to search them. 改进：Undoubtedly, scientists will not miss this valuable opportunity to examine these fossils before they are sold.

4.文章结构与组织 你的文章结构基本完整，包括引言、正文和结论。然而，在组织方面还有待提高。首先，每个段落应更明确地关注一个特定观点，并提供支持细节。此外，需要在段落和观点之间加入更清晰的过渡，使文章更具连贯性。

示例1： 原文：Firstly, according to the reading passage, it will be more difficult for the public to see fossils due to the fossils business. 改进：Firstly, the reading passage claims that the commercialization of fossils makes it more difficult for the public to view them.

示例2： 原文：Finally, the professor disputes the reading passage's view that when fossils are unburied by commercial collectors, collector may not notice how fossils lie in the ground. 改进：Finally, addressing the reading passage's concern about commercial collectors potentially destroying valuable scientific evidence, the professor presents a counterargument.

5. 语法批改

In the reading passage, the author posits that the sale of fossils by private collectors has some disadvantages for several reasons. However, in the lecture, the professor holds a dissenting opinion, asserting that the sale of fossils brings some benefits either.

Firstly, according to the reading passage, it will be more difficult for the public to see fossils due to the fossils business. On the other hand, the professor refutes that it is more likely to make the fossils more exposures to the public because the business make lots of fossils available for sale, which allows schools and museums to buy them. Therefore, the public could see fossils easier.

Furthermore, while the reading passage states presents that scientists could have lessfewer(fewer with countable nouns (less)) opportunities to access fossils and miss some discoveries, the professor argues that before fossils sold, they need scientists to identify, so they will be passed on scientists hands first. With outWithout(with out (without)) no doubt, scientists will not miss these great chance to search them.

Finally, the professor disputes the reading passage's view that when fossils are unburied by commercial collectors, collectorthe collector(This rule identifies whether the article 'the' is missing in a sentence.) may not notice how fossils lie in the ground. She points out that commercial behavior will make more fossils found, which is definitely better than being buried, even if there is some location information missing.

Section title: 6.文章修订

In the reading passage, the author asserts that the sale of fossils by private collectors has several disadvantages. However, the lecture presents a contrasting perspective, emphasizing the benefits of fossil sales.

Firstly, the reading passage claims that due to the fossil business, it will become more difficult for the public to view these ancient remains. Conversely, the professor contends that commercial fossil trade is likely to increase public exposure to fossils. This is because numerous fossils become available for purchase, enabling institutions such as schools and museums to acquire and display them for public viewing.

Furthermore, while the reading passage suggests that scientists may have limited access to important fossils and potentially miss crucial discoveries, the professor argues that this concern is unfounded. Before a fossil can be sold, it must be scientifically identified by experts in the field. Consequently, even if a fossil is destined for private ownership, it will pass through scientists' hands first, ensuring they do not miss out on any significant findings.

Lastly, the professor challenges the reading passage's assertion that commercial collectors may overlook crucial details about how fossils are situated in their original locations. The lecturer posits that despite some potential loss of contextual information, commercial fossil collection ultimately leads to more discoveries than would occur without it. This increased rate of discovery outweighs any drawbacks associated with incomplete data on a fossil's surroundings or position in the ground. (238 words)

In the reading passage, the author posits asserts that the sale of fossils by private collectors has some disadvantages for several reasons. disadvantages. However, in the lecture, the professor holds the lecture presents a dissenting opinion, asserting contrasting perspective, emphasizing the benefits of fossil sales (Changed "asserting that the sale of fossils brings some benefits either. either" to "emphasizing the benefits of fossil sales" for clarity and natural tone).

Firstly, according to the reading passage, passage claims that due to the fossil business, it will be become more difficult for the public to see fossils due to the fossils business. On the other hand, view these ancient remains. Conversely, the professor refutes that it contends that commercial fossil trade is likely to increase public exposure to fossils (Changed "make the fossils more likely to make the fossils more exposures to the exposures" to "increase public exposure to fossils" for proper grammar and natural tone). This is because the business make lots of fossils numerous fossils become available for sale, which allows purchase, enabling institutions such as schools and museums to buy them. Therefore, the acquire and display them for public could see fossils easier. viewing.

Furthermore, while the reading passage states presents suggests that scientists could may have less opportunities to limited access fossils and to important fossils and potentially miss some crucial discoveries, the professor argues that before fossils this concern is unfounded (Changed "states presents" to "suggests" for clarity and natural tone). Before a fossil can be sold, it must be scientifically identified by experts in the field. Consequently, even if a fossil is destined for private ownership, it will pass through scientists' hands first (Changed "scientists hands first" to "scientists' hands first" for proper punctuation), ensuring they need scientists to identify, so they will be passed on scientists hands first. With out no doubt, scientists will do not miss these great chance to search them. out on any significant findings.

Finally, Lastly, the professor disputes challenges the reading passage's view that when assertion that commercial collectors may overlook crucial details about how fossils are unburied by situated in their original locations. The lecturer posits that despite some potential loss of contextual information (Changed "location information missing" to "loss of contextual information" for clarity), commercial collectors, collector may not notice how fossils lie fossil collection ultimately leads to more discoveries than would occur without it. This increased rate of discovery outweighs any drawbacks associated with incomplete data on a fossil's surroundings or position in the ground. She points out that commercial behavior will make more fossils found, which is definitely better than being buried, even if there is some location information missing.ground.

8. Mind Map

Mind Map:

- Introduction
  - Reading passage: disadvantages of fossil sales
  - Lecture: benefits of fossil sales

- Point 1: Public access to fossils
  - Reading: limited public viewing
  - Lecture: increased exposure through purchases by institutions

- Point 2: Scientists' access to important fossils
  - Reading: limited access, missed discoveries
  - Lecture: identification by experts before sale ensures scientific access

- Point 3: Contextual information about fossils
  - Reading: loss of crucial details due to commercial collectors
  - Lecture: increased rate of discovery outweighs drawbacks of incomplete data

9. Keywords