TOEFL TPO -1 Writing Task 1 Sample: Directions: You have 20 minutes to plan and write your response. Your response will be judged on the basis of the quality of your writing and on how well your response presents the points in the lecture and their relationship to the reading passage. Typically an effective response will be 150 to 225 words. Question: Question: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they cast doubt on the specific points made in the reading passage.

1.子项得分 Task fulfillment: 4 Organization: 4 Coherence and Cohesion: 4 Language Use: 3

2.预估分数 Estimated Score: 25

3.任务完成度 整体来说，你的文章在任务完成度方面表现不错，基本上涵盖了阅读和听力材料中的主要观点。但是，有一些建议可以帮助你进一步提高：

1. 在引述阅读和听力材料时，尽量使用自己的话进行总结和解释，避免直接复制原文。

2. 在讨论每个观点时，尝试提供更多细节或例子来支持你的论述。

示例1（改进前）：The lecturer, however, asserts that the age of the material can not tell us when the portrait was painted because some artists used old Vellum to create new artworks. 示例1（改进后）：The lecturer contends that relying on the age of the vellum is not sufficient to determine when the portrait was created, as it was common for artists to use older vellum for their newer works.

示例2（改进前）：Without clear fingerprint the historians can not say certainty. 示例2（改进后）：Due to the lack of a clear fingerprint, historians cannot confidently assert that it belongs to Da Vinci.

4.文章结构与组织 在文章结构与组织方面，你的表现也相当不错。文章有明确的结构（引言、正文和结论），每段都集中讨论一个具体的观点。然而，有一些建议可以帮助你进一步提高：

1. 在引言部分，尝试更明确地指出文章的主题和目的。

2. 在段落之间使用更清晰的过渡词或短语，以帮助读者更好地理解你的观点。

示例1（改进前）：The author of the article argues that a Portrait was sold at auction belongs to Da Vinci. 示例1（改进后）：The reading passage posits that the Portrait of a Young Fiancée, which was sold at auction, is a work of Leonardo da Vinci.

示例2（改进前）：However, the lecturer challenges the argument by stating that if the portrait was painted by pastels, the color will had some tiny cracks. 示例2（改进后）：On the other hand, the lecturer counters this claim by asserting that if Da Vinci had indeed used pastels for this portrait, there would be visible tiny cracks in its color surfaces.

5. 语法批改

The author of the article argues that a Portrait was sold at auction belongs to Da Vinci. While, the lecturer disputes the claims mentioned in the article. His position is that the portrait was painted by other people much later.

Firstly, the reading passage states that historians analyzed the substance used to draw the portrait, and the substance reveals that it was pastel. Pastels were a new invention during Renaissancethe Renaissance(This rule identifies whether the article 'the' is missing in a sentence.) and Da Vinci was the first artist to use the pastels. Besides, the dress and hairstyle belong to that period. However, the lecturer challenges the argument by stating that if the portrait was painted by pastels, the color will had some tiny cracks. The older portrait will crack and reduce the smoothness. But this portrait is still smooth, so the portrait was painted much more recently.

Secondly, the author suggests that a material called Vellum is favored by Da Vinci and scientists found that Vellum was made between 1440 and 1650 which means it was old enough to have been used by Da Vinci. The lecturer, however, asserts that the age of the material can not tell us when the portrait was painted because some artists used old Vellum to create new artworks. The portrait may be painted in 18th. Besides, Da Vinci dislikes the Vellum, as none of his artworks waswere(Detects potentially wrong usage of "was") painted on the Vellum.

Lastly, the author puts forth the idea that artistthe artist(This rule identifies whether the article 'the' is missing in a sentence.) pressed a finger onto the chalk in the drawing. The fingerprint was compared with a fingerprint on another work that was unquestionably created by Da Vinci. In contrast, the lecturer argues that the fingerprint is not clear. The surface of the portrait is a suitable textile for pressing a fingerprint. Without clear fingerprint the historians can not say certainty.

Section Title: 6.文章修订

The article posits that a portrait sold at auction, titled "Portrait of a Young Fiancée," was created by Leonardo da Vinci, based on several pieces of evidence. However, the lecturer disputes these claims and contends that the portrait was likely painted by someone else much later.

Firstly, the reading passage states that historians analyzed the substances used in the portrait and found them to be pastels, which were a new invention during the Renaissance period. Da Vinci was known to be the first artist to use pastels, and the dress and hairstyle depicted in the portrait belong to that era. The lecturer challenges this argument by stating that if pastels were indeed used, there would be tiny cracks on the color surfaces due to aging. The older a pastel artwork gets, the more its surface cracks and loses smoothness. However, this particular portrait remains smooth, suggesting it was created more recently than during Da Vinci's time.

Secondly, the author suggests that Da Vinci favored a material called vellum for his artworks. Scientific testing indicates that the vellum used for this portrait dates back to between 1440 and 1650 – old enough to have been used by Da Vinci himself. The lecturer counters this claim by asserting that an artwork's age cannot be determined solely based on its material; artists have been known to use old vellum for creating new pieces. Furthermore, historical evidence suggests that Da Vinci actually disliked using vellum; none of his surviving drawings are on this material.

Lastly, the author presents evidence of a fingerprint pressed onto chalk in the drawing which matches another fingerprint found on an undisputed work by Da Vinci. The lecturer refutes this point by arguing that the fingerprint is not clear enough for comparison due to chalk being an unsuitable surface for capturing fingerprints accurately. As such, experts cannot definitively conclude whether or not both fingerprints belong to the same person, casting doubt on the portrait's attribution to Da Vinci. (331 words)

The author of the article argues that a Portrait was posits that a portrait sold at auction belongs to Da Vinci. While, auction, titled "Portrait of a Young Fiancée," was created by Leonardo da Vinci, based on several pieces of evidence. However, the lecturer disputes the these claims mentioned in the article. His position is and contends that the portrait was likely painted by other people someone else much later. later (Changed "argues" to "posits" for variety and added the title of the portrait for clarity).

Firstly, the reading passage states that historians analyzed the substance substances used to draw the portrait, and the substance reveals that it was pastel. Pastels in the portrait and found them to be pastels, which were a new invention during the Renaissance and period. Da Vinci was known to be the first artist to use the pastels. Besides, pastels, and the dress and hairstyle depicted in the portrait belong to that period. However, the era. The lecturer challenges the this argument by stating that if the portrait pastels were indeed used, there would be tiny cracks on the color surfaces due to aging (Changed "will had" to "would be" for proper grammar). The older a pastel artwork gets, the more its surface cracks and loses smoothness. However, this particular portrait remains smooth, suggesting it was painted by pastels, the color will had some tiny cracks. The older portrait will crack and reduce the smoothness. But this portrait is still smooth, so the portrait was painted much created more recently. recently than during Da Vinci's time.

Secondly, the author suggests that Da Vinci favored a material called Vellum is favored by Da Vinci and scientists found that Vellum was made vellum for his artworks. Scientific testing indicates that the vellum used for this portrait dates back to between 1440 and 1650 which means it was – old enough to have been used by Da Vinci. The lecturer, however, asserts that the Vinci himself. The lecturer counters this claim by asserting that an artwork's age of the material can not tell us when the portrait was painted because some cannot be determined solely based on its material; artists used have been known to use old Vellum to create vellum for creating new artworks. The portrait may pieces (Changed "may be painted in 18th. Besides, 18th" to "creating new pieces" for clarity). Furthermore, historical evidence suggests that Da Vinci dislikes the Vellum, as actually disliked using vellum; none of his artworks was painted on the Vellum. surviving drawings are on this material.

Lastly, the author puts forth the idea that artist presents evidence of a fingerprint pressed a finger onto the chalk in the drawing. The drawing which matches another fingerprint was compared with a fingerprint on another found on an undisputed work that was unquestionably created by Da Vinci. In contrast, the The lecturer argues refutes this point by arguing that the fingerprint is not clear. The clear enough for comparison due to chalk being an unsuitable surface of the portrait is a for capturing fingerprints accurately (Changed "a suitable textile for pressing a fingerprint. Without clear fingerprint the historians can textile" to "an unsuitable surface" for clarity). As such, experts cannot definitively conclude whether or not say certainty.both fingerprints belong to the same person, casting doubt on the portrait's attribution to Da Vinci.

8. Mind Map

Mind Map:

- Introduction
  - Portrait of a Young Fiancée
  - Claimed to be by Leonardo da Vinci

- Evidence from Reading Passage
  - Use of pastels
    - New invention during Renaissance
    - Da Vinci known to use pastels first
  - Vellum material
    - Dates back to between 1440 and 1650
    - Da Vinci favored vellum for his artworks
  - Fingerprint evidence
    - Matches fingerprint on undisputed Da Vinci work

- Lecturer's Counterarguments
  - Pastels and aging process
    - No tiny cracks on color surfaces in portrait
    - Suggests more recent creation than Da Vinci's time 
  - Vellum usage by Da Vinci disputed 
    - Historical evidence shows dislike for vellum 
    - None of surviving drawings on vellum 
  - Fingerprint not clear enough for comparison 
    - Chalk unsuitable surface for capturing fingerprints accurately 

9. Keywords