TOEFL TPO -1 Academic Discussion Writing Sample: One advertising strategy that companies often use is to ask celebrities, famous entertainers, or sports figures to promote their products. However some experts believe that it is more effective to have ordinary people talk about the product. Which of these two advertising strategies do you think is better?

1. 子项得分

Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5 Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0 Language Use and Grammar: 4.0

2. 预估分数

26. 3 任务完成度

整体来说，这篇文章较好地回答了题目，并提出了有力的观点。然而，为了更好地完成任务，建议在以下方面进行改进：

1. 提供更多具体的例子来支持观点。

2. 对于反对观点（使用名人作为广告代言人）进行简要讨论和反驳。

示例1（改进支持观点的例子）： 原文：...a product, such as a shower gel, which promoted by commons can well show that this product can solve hygiene or other issues well for most people's lives. 改进：For instance, a shower gel advertisement featuring ordinary people from different age groups and backgrounds can effectively demonstrate how the product addresses various hygiene concerns for a wider audience.

示例2（讨论和反驳反对观点）： 原文：无 改进：While using celebrities in advertisements may initially grab viewers' attention, it does not guarantee that the product will be relatable to the general public. Celebrities often lead luxurious lifestyles that are far removed from the experiences of ordinary people, making it difficult for consumers to connect with the product on a personal level.

4. 文章结构与组织

文章的结构和组织方面表现良好，包括引言、正文和结论。然而，在以下方面可以进行改进：

1. 在引言中更明确地陈述论点。

2. 在正文中使用更清晰的过渡词或短语来连接不同的观点。

示例1（改进引言中的论点陈述）： 原文：In my perspective, it is more effective to have ordinary people talk about the product as advertising strategies than asking famous people to promote products. 改进：I firmly believe that using ordinary people in advertising campaigns is a more effective strategy than relying on celebrities to promote products.

示例2（改进正文中的过渡词或短语）： 原文：...Moreover, based on the shared problems that the ordinaries may face in their lives... 改进：Additionally, considering the common challenges faced by ordinary individuals in their daily lives...

5. 语法批改

(Whitespace repetition (bad formatting))In my perspective, it is more effective to have ordinary people talk about the product as advertising strategies than asking famous people to promote products. Although famous people may have a strong fan base which can make it useful to promote products by utilizing their social influences, ordinary people, who have common backgrounds and living standards as public, can more efficiently and easily appeal to the public’s credulity and emotions. In other words, stemming from price level, products that are promoted by commons can well show that their prices are appropriate and affordable for most people. Moreover, based on the shared problems that the ordinaries may face in their lives, a product, such as a shower gel, which promoted by commons can well show that this product can solve hygiene or other issues well for most people's lives. Furthermore, I concur with Paul’s assertion which largely aligns with my opinion that people can get a better idea from looking at a large sample space but not just some unique models, especially in the clothing area. It is always a problem for people to buy clothes because they have difficulties deciding which size and color to choose. However, most models are very thin and good in skin color, which is not the common case among ordinaries. In contrast, by using commons as'(Unpaired quotation marks) models’(Unpaired quotation marks), people can get a better insight into which one is better and suitable for them, which can make the advertising strategy more successful. (Whitespace repetition (bad formatting))As a result, applying ordinary people to promote products will be a more effective advertising strategy than using famous people based on its universality.

Section Title: The Effectiveness of Ordinary People in Advertising

In my perspective, utilizing ordinary people as the primary advertising strategy is more effective than enlisting famous individuals to promote products. Although celebrities may have a strong fan base, which can be advantageous for product promotion through their social influence, ordinary people with relatable backgrounds and living standards can more efficiently and convincingly appeal to the public's trust and emotions. In other words, products promoted by everyday individuals can better demonstrate that their prices are appropriate and affordable for most consumers. Moreover, based on shared experiences and challenges faced by the general population, a product (such as shower gel) promoted by ordinary people can effectively convey its ability to address hygiene or other common issues.

Furthermore, I concur with Paul's assertion that people can gain a better understanding of a product when it is represented by a diverse sample rather than just unique models, especially in the clothing industry. Selecting appropriate clothing sizes and colors often poses a challenge for consumers. However, most models possess atypical body types and flawless complexions, which do not accurately represent the general population. In contrast, using ordinary individuals as 'models' allows potential buyers to gain better insight into which options are best suited for them, ultimately making the advertising strategy more successful.

Consequently, employing ordinary people to promote products proves to be a more effective advertising strategy than relying on famous individuals due to its universal appeal. (242 words)

In my perspective, it utilizing ordinary people as the primary advertising strategy (this phrase is revised to emphasize the focus on ordinary people as the main approach in advertising) is more effective to have ordinary people talk about the product as advertising strategies than asking enlisting famous people individuals to promote products. Although famous people celebrities may have a strong fan base base, which can be advantageous for product promotion through their social influence (this part is rephrased to make it useful to promote products by utilizing their social influences, ordinary people, who have common clearer and more concise), ordinary people with relatable backgrounds and living standards as public, can more efficiently and easily convincingly appeal to the public’s credulity public's trust and emotions. In other words, stemming from price level, products that are promoted by commons can well show everyday individuals (revised for better flow) can better demonstrate that their prices are appropriate and affordable for most people. consumers. Moreover, based on the shared problems that the ordinaries may face in their lives, a product, experiences and challenges faced by the general population (rephrased for clarity), a product (such as a shower gel, which gel) promoted by commons can well show that this product can solve ordinary people can effectively convey its ability to address hygiene or other issues well for most people's lives. common issues.

Furthermore, I concur with Paul’s Paul's assertion which largely aligns with my opinion that people can get a better idea from looking at a large gain a better understanding of a product when it is represented by a diverse sample space but not rather than just some unique models, models (rephrased for clarity), especially in the clothing area. It is always a problem for people to buy clothes because they have difficulties deciding which size and color to choose. industry. Selecting appropriate clothing sizes and colors often poses a challenge for consumers. However, most models are very thin and good in skin color, possess atypical body types and flawless complexions (revised for better flow), which is do not the common case among ordinaries. accurately represent the general population. In contrast, by using commons as' models’, people can get a ordinary individuals as 'models' allows potential buyers to gain better insight into which one is better and suitable for them, which can make options are best suited for them (rephrased for clarity), ultimately making the advertising strategy more successful.

As a result, applying Consequently, employing ordinary people to promote products will proves to be a more effective advertising strategy than using relying on famous people based on individuals due to its universality.universal appeal (rephrased for conciseness).

Title: 8 思维导图

1. 介绍

   • 普通人与名人广告效果的比较

2. 名人广告的优势

   • 强大的粉丝基础
   • 社会影响力

3. 普通人广告的优势

   • 可信度与共鸣
   • 价格适中与可负担性
   • 解决日常问题的能力

4. 行业应用：服装行业

   • 多样性与真实性
   • 更好地选择尺寸和颜色

5. 结论

   • 普通人广告策略更具普遍吸引力

Title: 9 关键词