TOEFL TPO 17 Writing Task 1 Sample: Summarize the points made in the lecture, being sure to explain how they challenge the specific points made in the reading passage.

1.子项得分 任务完成度：4 组织：4 连贯与衔接：4 语言使用：4

2.预估分数

25. 3.任务完成度

你的文章在回答问题方面做得很好，但还有一些可以改进的地方。首先，在引用听力材料中的例子时，可以更具体一些。例如，你提到了城市中鸟类数量增加的例子，但没有详细说明这是如何发生的。此外，在讨论农业对鸟类影响时，可以提供更多关于新作物如何减少对鸟类栖息地破坏的信息。

示例1： 原文：“According to him, although the population of certain types of birds will be in decline, other types will increase.” 改进：“According to him, although the population of certain types of birds will be in decline, other types such as pigeons and seagulls will increase due to the availability of food sources in urban areas.”

示例2： 原文：“He further explains that the increase of the agriculture will result from the introduction of a new crop which will provide more food for humans.” 改进：“He further explains that the increase in agriculture will result from the introduction of new high-yield crops, which produce more food per unit of land and thus reduce the need for converting wilderness areas into farmland.”

4.文章结构与组织 你的文章结构清晰，包括引言、正文和结论。每段都集中讨论一个特定的观点和支持细节。然而，可以在段落之间添加更明确的过渡词或短语，以帮助读者更好地理解文章的逻辑。

建议1：在引言部分，可以使用过渡词汇如“首先”、“其次”和“最后”来概述文章将讨论的三个主要观点。 示例：“The lecture challenges the reading's arguments by stating that urban growth can benefit some bird species, new agricultural practices will not necessarily harm bird habitats, and the future use of pesticides may be less harmful to birds.”

建议2：在正文段落中，可以使用过渡词汇如“然而”、“相反”和“此外”来强调听力材料与阅读材料之间的对比。 示例：“However, the professor refutes this view, arguing that urban growth has provided a larger and better environment for other types of birds, such as seagulls and eagles. In contrast, the reading passage contends that the expansion of human populations and settlements has caused the disappearance of birds' natural habitats.”

5. 语法批改

The reading passage and the listening comprehension discuss the possibility of a decline in birds’ populations with the increase in human population and the spread of pesticides. While the reading contends that this will definitely bring the decline in the number of birds in the United States, the lecture challenges this by suggesting that the support for fewer and fewer birds into(This rule identifies wrong preposition usage.) exist is not convincing. Firstly, the writer claims that the expansion of human populations and settlements has caused the disappearance of birds’ natural habitats. Therefore, the bird population is likely to decrease. However, the professor refutes this view, arguing that urban growth has provided a larger and better environment for other types of birds, such as seagulls and eagles. According to him, although the population of certain types of birds will be in decline, other types will increase. As a result, it is not universally true that the overall bird population will decrease. Secondly, the writer asserts that the size of the bird populations will continue to decline in rural areas because more and more habitats will vanish for the agricultural use. In contrast, the professor maintains a different opinion, stating that it is not the way assumed by reading. He further explains that the increase of the agriculture will result from the introduction of a new crop which will provide more food for humans. Therefore, there is no need to destroy the birds’ habitats in rural areas for agriculture. Finally, the writer states that the increasing use of pesticide will kill or harm birds inadvertently and this trend will continue. Contrary to the reading’s view, the professor believes that it is an incorrect projection of the future. In other words, people have been aware of the negative impacts of the pesticides and have designed two mechanisms to deal with this problem. First, new pesticide which will bring less harm to the birds will be developed. And second, there is an ongoing trend to popularize pest-resistant plants which are unattractive to pests. Consequently, people will reduce the use of pesticides and there will be less harm to the birds at all.

Section Title: 6.文章修订

The reading passage and the listening comprehension discuss the possibility of a decline in birds’ populations with the increase in human population and the spread of pesticides. While the reading contends that this will definitely bring the decline in the number of birds in the United States, the lecture challenges this by suggesting that the support for fewer and fewer birds in existence is not convincing.

Firstly, the writer claims that the expansion of human populations and settlements has caused the disappearance of birds’ natural habitats. Therefore, the bird population is likely to decrease. However, the professor refutes this view, arguing that urban growth has provided a larger and better environment for other types of birds, such as seagulls and eagles. According to him, although the population of certain types of birds will be in decline, other types will increase. As a result, it is not universally true that the overall bird population will decrease.

Secondly, the writer asserts that bird populations will continue to decline in rural areas because more and more habitats will vanish for agricultural use. In contrast, the professor maintains a different opinion, stating that it is not as assumed by reading. He further explains that increased agriculture will result from introducing new crops which provide more food for humans. Therefore, there is no need to destroy birds’ habitats in rural areas for agriculture.

Finally, the writer states that increasing pesticide use will inadvertently kill or harm birds and this trend will continue. Contrary to reading’s view, however, professor believes it is an incorrect projection of future outcomes. In other words, people have become aware of negative impacts from pesticides and have designed two mechanisms to deal with this problem: first developing less harmful pesticides; secondly popularizing pest-resistant plants which are unattractive to pests. Consequently reducing pesticide use results in less harm to birds overall. (312 words)

Revised essay: Section Title: 7.文章批改

The reading passage and the listening comprehension discuss the possibility of a decline in birds’ birds' populations with the increase in human population and the spread of pesticides. While the reading contends that this will definitely bring the about a decline in the number of birds in the United States, the lecture challenges this by suggesting that the support evidence for fewer and fewer birds in exist existence is not convincing.

Firstly, the writer claims that the expansion of human populations and settlements has caused the disappearance of birds’ birds' natural habitats. Therefore, the habitats, leading to a likely decrease in bird population is likely to decrease. populations. However, the professor refutes this view, arguing that urban growth has provided a larger and better environment for other types of birds, such as seagulls and eagles. eagles (reason: improved clarity). According to him, although the population of certain types of birds will be in bird populations will decline, other types will increase. As a result, others will increase; thus, it is not universally true that the overall bird population populations will decrease.

Secondly, the writer asserts that the size of the bird populations will continue to decline in rural areas because more and more habitats will vanish for the due to agricultural use. In contrast, the professor maintains a different opinion, stating that it is not the way as assumed by reading. reading (reason: improved clarity). He further explains that the increase of the increased agriculture will result from the introduction of a introducing new crop crops which will provide more food for humans. humans (reason: improved clarity). Therefore, there is no need to destroy the birds’ birds' habitats in rural areas for agriculture.

Finally, the writer states that the increasing pesticide use of pesticide will will inadvertently kill or harm birds inadvertently and this trend will continue. Contrary to the reading’s view, the reading's view (reason: consistency), however, professor believes that it is an incorrect projection of the future. future outcomes (reason: improved clarity). In other words, people have been become aware of the negative impacts of the from pesticides and have designed two mechanisms to deal with this problem. First, new pesticide which will bring problem: first developing less harm to the birds will be developed. And second, there is an ongoing trend to popularize harmful pesticides; secondly popularizing pest-resistant plants which are unattractive to pests. Consequently, people will reduce the pests (reason: improved clarity). Consequently reducing pesticide use of pesticides and there will be results in less harm to the birds at all.overall.

8. Mind Map

1. Introduction
   - Reading passage: Decline in bird populations
   - Lecture: Challenges the claim
   

2. Expansion of human populations
   - Reading: Disappearance of natural habitats
   - Lecture: Urban growth provides better environment for some birds
   

3. Decline in rural areas
   - Reading: Habitats vanish for agricultural use
   - Lecture: New crops provide more food, no need to destroy habitats
   

4. Pesticide use
   - Reading: Increasing harm to birds
   - Lecture: Developing less harmful pesticides and pest-resistant plants
   

5. Conclusion
   - Contrasting views between reading and lecture

9. Keywords