TOEFL TPO -1 Academic Discussion Writing Sample: Let's continue talking about consumer behavior. We have been discussing different ways people go about choosing what products to buy, and there are many potential sources of information and advice for consumers. In your opinion, which is the better strategy for making purchasing decisions. relying on advice from friends and family, or depending on information from online sources? Why?

1. 子项得分

• Relevance and Contribution to Discussion: 4.5

• Clarity and Elaboration of Viewpoint: 4.0

• Language Use and Grammar: 3.5

2. 预估分数

24. 3 任务完成度

你的文章在回答问题方面做得不错，但还有一些需要改进的地方。首先，你需要更详细地解释为什么朋友和家人的建议比在线信息更可靠。此外，你可以提供更多具体的例子来支持你的观点。最后，在语法和词汇方面，你需要注意一些错误，并尝试使用更丰富的词汇和句子结构。

Example 1: Instead of "The reason for this is that people are able to see the product that family and friends advised in person and make sure the real effect of a company.", you could write "One reason for this is that people can personally examine the products recommended by their friends and family, which allows them to verify the actual quality and performance of these items."

Example 2: Instead of "In this case, people will be cheat by the wonderful advertising and not be able to see the real function of the company", you could write "In such cases, consumers may be misled by persuasive advertisements, preventing them from accurately assessing the true capabilities of a product."

4. 文章结构与组织

从文章结构和组织角度来看，你的文章整体上表现良好。然而，有一些建议可以帮助你进一步改进文章。首先，在引言部分，你可以更明确地陈述你的观点。其次，正文段落中可以使用更清晰的过渡词来引导读者。最后，为了使文章更具说服力，你可以在结论部分总结你的观点并重申论据。

Example 1: For a clearer introduction, you could write "In the age of abundant online information, it is still more beneficial for consumers to rely on advice from friends and family when making purchasing decisions."

Example 2: To improve transitions between ideas, you could use phrases like "Firstly," "Moreover," and "In contrast" to guide the reader through your argument. For example: "Firstly, advice from friends and family is often based on personal experience with the product."

5. 语法批改

From my point of view, making purchasing decisions relying on advice from friends and family is a better strategy. The reason for this is that people are able tocan see the product that family and friends advised in person and make sureensure the real effectimpact of a company. Consequently, they can avoid the situationsituations of false advertising. For instance, when people try to buy a computer, they will both check the information online and ask advice from their friends, theyfriends. They may be able to see a fake advertisement online. The company may spentspend a great proportion of their budget inon boosting their productsproducts, such as paying the celebrities huge amountamounts of money to endorse their products and devoting less money into product research. The computer that customer receivedreceives may have a different usinguser experience from the advertisement. In this case, people will be cheatcheated by the wonderful advertising and not be able to see the real function of the companycompany.

Section Title: 6 Article Revision

In my opinion, the better strategy for making purchasing decisions is to rely on advice from friends and family. The primary reason for this preference is that individuals can personally examine the products recommended by their loved ones, ensuring a more accurate representation of the item's quality. This approach helps consumers avoid falling prey to deceptive advertising tactics.

For example, when purchasing a computer, individuals often consult both online information and advice from friends. By doing so, they can potentially identify misleading advertisements. Some companies may allocate a significant portion of their budget to promoting their products through celebrity endorsements or other marketing strategies while neglecting product research and development. As a result, the actual user experience may differ significantly from what was advertised. In such cases, consumers may be swayed by enticing advertisements without fully understanding the product's true capabilities. By seeking input from friends and family who have firsthand experience with the product, buyers can make more informed decisions and avoid disappointment in their purchases. (172 words)

From In my point of view, opinion, the better strategy for making purchasing decisions relying is to rely on advice from friends and family is a better strategy. ¶ (reason: it's more personal and trustworthy). The primary reason for this preference is that people are able to individuals can personally examine the products recommended by their loved ones (explanation: they can see and test the product that family and friends advised in person and make sure themselves), ensuring a more accurate representation of the item's quality. This approach helps consumers avoid falling prey to deceptive advertising tactics (reason: they have a reliable source of information).

For example, when purchasing a computer, individuals often consult both online information and advice from friends. By doing so, they can potentially identify misleading advertisements (explanation: friends' experiences can help spot fake ads). Some companies may allocate a significant portion of their budget to promoting their products through celebrity endorsements or other marketing strategies while neglecting product research and development (reason: companies might prioritize marketing over quality). As a result, the actual user experience may differ significantly from what was advertised (explanation: ads might not reflect the real effect of a company. Consequently, they can avoid the situation of false advertising. For instance, when people try to buy a computer, they will both check the information online and ask advice from their friends, they product performance). In such cases, consumers may be able to see a fake advertisement online. The company may spent a great proportion of their budget swayed by enticing advertisements without fully understanding the product's true capabilities (reason: ads can be misleading). By seeking input from friends and family who have firsthand experience with the product, buyers can make more informed decisions and avoid disappointment in boosting their products such as paying the celebrities huge amount of money to endorse their products and devoting less money in product research. The computer that customer received may have a different using experience from the advertisement. In this case, people will be cheat by the wonderful advertising and not be able to see the real function of the companytheir purchases (explanation: trusted advice leads to better choices).

Title: 8 思维导图

1. Purchasing Decisions
   a. Advice from friends and family
      i. Personal examination of products
      ii. Accurate representation of quality
   b. Avoid deceptive advertising tactics

2. Example: Buying a computer
   a. Consult online information and friends' advice
      i. Identify misleading advertisements
   b. Companies' marketing strategies
      i. Celebrity endorsements
      ii. Neglecting product research and development
   c. Actual user experience vs advertised capabilities

3. Benefits of seeking input from loved ones
   a. Informed decisions
   b. Avoid disappointment in purchases

Title: 9 关键词